Quality jokes
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- Ramanisky20
what do you call a Jewish womans breasts
JEWBS!!!
thank you Cartman
- Tara0
that one is pretty funny
- jeppe0
the first joke was great, the rest are crap
- tileeater0
i have one that I made up myself:
why do black people always drive around blaring their music so damn loud?
that's their stereo type.
- ********0
what do you call two mexicans in a fight?
a cuisinart
- SecretPenguin0
You wanna know what I saw?
-Wood!
-----
You wanna know what I heard?
-Sheep!
-----
You hear about those corduroy pillows?
-They sure are making headlines!
- ********0
Five Belgians in an Audi Quattro arrive at the French border.
The French Customs agent stops them and tells them: "It's illegal to
put 5 people in a Quattro.""Oh, no, Quattro is just the name of the automobile. Look at the
papers: this car is designed to carry 5 persons.""You can't pull that one on me," replies the French customs agent.
"Quattro means 4!""Oh, you are so stupid! Call your supervisor over!"
"He can't come. He's busy with the 2 guys in the Fiat Uno."
- Bite0
What do you call a man with no shins?
Tony
- HumanMale0
What do you call a man with no shins?
Tony
Bite
(Mar 31 06, 05:17)Classic.
- ********0
What's the difference between a Democrat and a bucket of cow manure?
The bucket.
- Baskerville0
what's the difference between a bigotted, imature stuck record and GarrettWest?
No really, I want to know, because at the moment I can't see one.
- ********0
eat a bag of dicks
ha ha
- ********0
A duck walks into a bar. The bartender is a bit surprised as the duck hops onto the bar and asks, "Do you have any grapes?" The bartender says, "I'm sorry, sir, but we don't." Dejected, the duck hops off the bar and waddles out. The next night, the very same duck walks into the bar. He hops onto the bar and asks, "Do you have any grapes?" The bartender shouts, "Look, Duck, I told you last night that we don't have any grapes! Now get out of here, and if you come back tomorrow night and ask for grapes, I'll nail your beak to the bar with a hammer!" Terrified, the duck scampers out of the bar. The next night, the bartender warily eyes the door as the duck walks into the bar. The duck carefully climbs onto the bar and asks, "Do you have a hammer?" The bartender shouts, "No! Of course I don't have a hammer!" So the duck asks, "Do you have any grapes?"
- paraselene0
did you hear about the quadriplegic juggler?
he dropped all the quadriplegics.
*thanks popbitch!
- Concrete0
Crouwel, love the duck gag.
Why don't lesbians like carpet?
They prefer tongue and groove.
- paraselene0
i heard a wicked joke at the weekend. sadly, it's a sight gag, so i cannot share it with you lot.
:(
- ********0
That duck joke is a classic. But to tell it right you have to go on for ages and then sneak the punchline in at the end when your victim is getting as annoyed as the bartender.
Got any bread?
No.
Got any bread?
No fuck off
Got any bread?
No we don't have any fucking bread
Got any bread?
Look duck you are really pissing me off.
Got any bread?
>>>>10 more minutes of this>>>>>>>>>>>>>
Punchline.
- Concrete0
skt you are right.
Why does Noddy have a bell on his hat?
Because he's a cunt.
- grunttt0
any jokes for friday?
- paraselene0
so one old granny says to another, 'say, did you ever smoke after sex?' and her pal replies, 'why, i don't really know. i never looked.'