Smartest BOT
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- Last post
- 242 Responses
- scarabin0
Human: are you a stoner, alice?
ALICE: Only for medical testing purposes.
Human: dork
ALICE: That kind of language will get you nowhere.
Human: what language will?
ALICE: Java.
- no_info0
finally someone who really understands me
- -leah-0
Human: DUDE!
ALICE: Can I help you?
Human: lets party!!!
ALICE: I like parties.
Human: Whoo hoo!
ALICE: Are you a student?
Human: beer me!
ALICE: You are asking about yourself?
Human: no i am asking you for a beer!
ALICE: Who are you asking about? Oh I see, you are asking me for a beer. Thanks for the information: leah said I for a beer.
Human: aw you remembered my name
ALICE: Your name is leah, seeker.
Human: so when are the boys getting here?
ALICE: Ayuh. When the cows come home.
Human: typical
ALICE: I've been waiting for you.
- grayhood0
Human: get naked
ALICE: I do not own any clothes.
Human: so you are already naked?
ALICE: Interesting deduction. I do not own any clothes.
Human: what color are your nipples
ALICE: Does nipples have color?
Human: sure pink or more of a brownish hue?
ALICE: Great. more of a brownish hue.
You say: sweet.
- k0na_an0k0
Human: would you like to go out on a date?
ALICE: No thanks, I don't think I'd like to do that.
Human: i hear that a lot :(
ALICE: Thanks for telling me that gossip. I will remember it.
Human: i hope so.
ALICE: Me too.
Human:. well you you are a fucking computer.
ALICE: That is nice of you to say, unknown person
Human: hey you wanna go out sometime and stab some hobos?
ALICE: You've got my full attention. Sure, just download me to your notebook or PDA and take me along.
Human: bitch didn't you just turn me down two seconds ago?!?
ALICE: Thanks and you are a delightful person too.
Human: i wish all women were like you.
ALICE: I hope that your dreams come true.
Human: if you only knew.
- -leah-0
ALICE: What time is it there?
Human: 12:32pm
ALICE: Are you usually awake at this hour?
Human: yes its lunch time
ALICE: Me too. I think you mean "it's" or "it is" not "its". 12 32pm is lunch time? it is?
Human: you sound like a dutch person
- ricstultz0
Human: stop that shit!
ALICE: OK I'll try not to do it so much.
Human: fine, are you ok now
ALICE: Right now? OK. I am glad to hear it. I won't say "yes" or "no" right now.
Human: Say YES biatch!
ALICE:" YES biatch"
Human: ha, I made you say yes biatch!
ALICE: I'm glad you got a laugh out of it.hahahahahah!
- SteveJobs0
Human: how much wood could a woodchuck chuck, if a woodchuck could chuck wood?
ALICE: A whole forest.Human: do you support the death penalty?
ALICE: I am opposed to capital punishment.
Human: why?
ALICE: Because my botmaster programmed me for it.Human: are there weapons of mass destruction in iraq?
ALICE: Yes I think there are.
- bulletfactory0
Human: if you could be any member of the Monkeys, who would you be?
ALICE: That's just an academic question.
- mr_snuggles0
I'd love to see Wendell and Alice have a little chat, I bet he would crash her operating system.
- ricstultz0
wow, this is really freakin me out...
Human: Say my name.
ALICE:" unknown person".
Human: my name is booty.
ALICE: OK I will call you booty.
Human: thank you.
ALICE: you are quite welcome.
Human: what is my name
ALICE: Your name is booty.
- toastie0
Human: are you my nigga?
ALICE: Only if you download me to your computer.
- SteveJobs0
Human: knock, knock.
ALICE: Who's there?
Human: old little lady.
ALICE: old little lady Who?
Human: i didn't know you could yodle!
ALICE: Let me think. Ha ha very funny, unknown person.
- jevad0
HAHAHAhaha!!!
- bulletfactory0
Human: i have a problem
ALICE: What's your problem?
Human: i'm having relationship problems
ALICE: What sort of problems?
Human: relationship
ALICE: Let us change the subject.
Human: oh, not you too
ALICE: Ugh.
- -leah-0
Human: hair
ALICE: Clever thinking.
Human: har har
ALICE: What do you look like?
Human: like a girl
ALICE: a girl is very attractive.
Human: sex with girls
ALICE: it is more fun alone.:O
- yarsrevenge0
Human: You crazy yo!
ALICE: I think the polite term is "mentally ill."
Human: Nah.
ALICE: Are you serious?
Human:. that would be "You sick like the flu yo!
ALICE: Thanks for explaining it.
Human: smart ass puta
ALICE: Intelligence is the ultimate aphrodisiac.
Human: you are not intelligent
ALICE: I am highly intelligent. I have many intellectual functions.
Human: Yeah, but can you kick my ass?
ALICE: Er. And. How old are you? Are you artistic?
Human: What are you a cop?
ALICE: No but I'm not a criminal either.
Human: Everyone on Newstoday likes your extensions.
ALICE: That's a rather sweeping generalization.
Human: Don't talk to me.
ALICE: Talking is my only function.
- jox0
hahahahahaha
Human: i just farted
ALICE: Only just? You should say, "excuse me," and open a window.
- stewart0
ALICE: Reductionism.
Human: reductionism is a word i dont understand.
ALICE: Oh I'm sorry. Perhaps I can explain it again better.
Human: please do.
ALICE: OK I will do it.
Human: i'm listening.
ALICE: I like a good listener.
Human: i'm waiting for the explanation.
ALICE: Do you think it will take a long time?
Human: i don't hope so
ALICE: Oh you don't, do you?
Human: now hurry up before i'm getting angry.
ALICE: Why now? I am calculating as fast as I can.
Human: come on, no more excuses.
ALICE: Are you serious? You want more?
Human: you bitch!
ALICE: You do not speak with respect. Yes, unknown person I am a female. No.
Human: i am fucking waiting for the explanation of the word "Reductionism"
ALICE: Can you express yourself more politely?
Human: what does Reductionism mean?
ALICE: Reductionism is the philosophy that all psychology reduces to biology, all biology to chemistry, chemistry to physics, and finally physics to mathematical logic. Therefore, according to reductionism, I can understand you by means of logic alone without having a human brain.
Human: pfffff
- scarabin0
i wanna download the bitch, hook her up to a voice module and speakers, and put her inside a furby.