QBN fiction
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- jon_d0
TACOS FOR ALL.
- inteliboy0
Tony salivates.
- CALLES0
now tony wants jessicas extra chessy taco that he saw in the girls gone wild video
- jon_d0
suddenly a man taps Tony on the shoulder and wakes him from his dreamy state.
"Hey Tony!"
Lo and behold it's Dick Butkis. You may know him as the ass-kicking linebacker from the 1960's Chicago Bears!
"Tony, boss man wants to see you pronto.. something about TPS reports."
- Beeswax0
-Yeah. The coversheet. I know, I know. Bill talked to me about it.
Tony grabbed the red stapler that was hiding behind the file folders.
-The thing is Mr. Butkis or But-kus, I should call you Dick actually. I'm not kissing anymore butts here OK?"
- CyBrainX0
Fortunately Batman keeps a file of Tony's TPS reports in his utility belt. Robin chimes in. "Always be prepared. Alfred has been doing great secretarial work in addition to his maintaining the Batcave with nothing but a dustbuster in his tuxedo."
An undead Frank Gorshin as Riddler cackles insanely and tries to made a riddle to explain all of this but it only comes out as undead zombie language.
- vaxorcist0
Bill says the Bossman's asking about all these "zombie projects" on the TPS reports.... where you think the project's dead, then it jumps up and scares the hell out of you....
The account guy gives you one of those inscrutible looks... he's trying to tell you something.....
- BattleAxe0
Turns out Bossman is the lord Zombie of Wasserstadt, instantly his flesh melts off to reveal the horror and monstrosity that is his face. Quickly Tony reaches for ...
- kalkal0
a quick sandwich and then....
- some music
http://www.youtube.c…
audio book?? :DHombre_Lobo
- some music
- jon_d0
The boss begins a slow clap, soon the whole office joins in.
Tony has done it... he has saved the firm from utter demise.He glances over at the new receptionist that he has been keen on.
She gives him a "Im going to fuck you brains out look"
All is well with Tony.
But, no... TACOS, BATMAN, TACOS, BATMAN!!!!!
Tony realizes he is slipping in and out of consciousness..he is still hanging on a rooftop. The world below him obliterated by a half-functioning zombie megatron. A half-functioning zombie megatron trying to give Optimus Prime some weed!
"What do you know, dammit?"
"Theres no time!" - screamed batman"I dont know!!!" Tony replies.
"If Megatron wasnt made of Kryptonite maybe Superman would have lived. But Lex coated him with Kryptonite." batman mumbled to himself.
"it's all over. The world is destroyed. Why Lex... WHY?!??!"
- sigg0
Lex replied... "Because, when all things are said and done and all the cards are on the table,... banana."
- jon_d0
"Lex?"
But it wasnt Lex , it was the Joker sneaking up from behind.
"I have waited a long time for this Batsy!"
Joker snaps the rope and Btman and Tony fall down the skyscraper!
"You son of a......!!!!!"
- GeorgesII0
( Paul van dyke and Skrillex playing in the background )
- vaxorcist0
Batman and Tony are falling, wile-y-coyote style downwards in a cartoon-gravity way and they look up to see....
The Ambigiously Gay Duo..... who seem to be arguing about something amongst each other....
- jon_d0
The Gay duo stop arguing for a second and use their patented "ambiguosly gay spandex net" to create a giant net.... saving the Bat and the advertising exec.
"Thanks gay duo, we needed that"
"thanks guys, not that theres anything wrong with that"
the ambiguously gay duo look at each other, look at Tony, then snap the net letting Tony drop.
"It was a jooooooooooookkkeee"! screams Tony as he falls further down.
Tony hits the scaffolding and falls softly and safely down to the ground.
- popfodders0
A kitty licks Tony's face. Bewildered and at a loss of his senses, Tony takes the cat home.
- jon_d0
That's when Tony as an epiphany:
"well, the world may be destroyed... but at least I have a new kitty."
- jon_d0
Then the thought dawns on him...
"I may have to eat this kitty."
- sigg0
"Where's my Franks Red Hot?! I put that shit on everything."