Marriage.
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- ok_not_ok0
I don't want to be the one saying this but..GROW SOME BALLS MAN!
Getting divorced from this woman will be the best thing that will happen to you and your kids. Do you want your kids to grow up in a family where love is absent and all they see fighting, bickering and mom putting dad down all the time?
Kids are resilient and tougher than we think. Yes it will be tough for a few months but they will understand that things happen for a reason and for the better.
This is your chance to prove to yourself and show your kids that you're the MAN of the house and their LIFE!
You have to take care of yourself first before you can take care of anyone else.
- "will be tough for a few months"? What are you, 12? No offense but your advice sucks.monkeyshine
- <scarabin
- why, because it's difficult?scarabin
- Yeah i'm 12 with 2 daughters.
So you would rather have your children be exposed to daily fights and put downs?ok_not_ok - Fighting parents are worse than divorced parents.CyBrainX
- no they're not. i hated watching my parents fight. glad they divorced.CanHasQBN
- oh, nevermind CyBrain. i read it backwards.CanHasQBN
- JoeGrizzly0
Blog post on the ordeal if anyone wants to read it.
http://mathewsims.tumblr.com/pos…
I just want to thank everyone for their input. I really can't love this place enough.
- has she read that?scarabin
- no.JoeGrizzly
- you should consider asking her to read that, even if you edit it first.Amicus
- monkeyshine0
"why, because it's difficult?" - if that was about my comment that ok's advice sucks...no. Because it's shallow and unrealistic. It's idiotic to tell someone to bail on their marriage so they can be the man of their house and their life. Yeah, do that after you've tried everything else...that's being a man.
- Are you single?ok_not_ok
- Nope...14 yrs. no kids though. My parents divorced...twice (yes, to one another). Relationships are work.monkeyshine
- to me unrealistic is putting two people that hate each other into a room and expecting them to suddenly be all lovey 'n' shitscarabin
- See..you turn out ok..right? lol
It does take work..but it seems like the other party doesnt want to cooperate.ok_not_ok - I agree. hate & anger/ resentment aren't the same though. Maybe this is salvageable - we don't know.monkeyshine
- truescarabin
- Ramanisky20
I don't get why people get married in the first place..
It's not for everyone .. Most find this out when it's too late.Good luck to you Joe.. I hope it turns out good for you and your family.
- JoeGrizzly0
Thanks so much.
- CALLES0
i dont have experience on this. but try to keep your chin up and if it goes down... well time can do wonders...
- moldero0
take a break, and take it slow, separate b4 you divorce, some time apart will work wonders, ive been separated from mine for almost a year. things are finally looking like we might have a chance, If we didnt have a young daughter it would have been different, we would have just said "fuck you" to each other and split. but with kids its a game changer, your life is no longer about you anymore, the only thing that matters is your kids. take it slow, take some time, dont play the blame game it will just make shit worst. good luck seriously, shit sucks.
- focus all your anger here: http://www.qbn.com/t…moldero
- See? Good advice. ;)monkeyshine
- garretttt0
you gotta find the right one...
- capn_ron0
Man, i wish i could tell you it didn't happen to me. But it did. You are going to have some serious introspection to deal with, which is good. The main advice i can give you is to realize it is okay to feel sad and upset. Just understand that those feeling are not going to last forever and they will slowly happen less and less. There is no easy solution, and it sounds like you have a lot of thoughts going into this already. So do what you feel is right and you won't regret it in the long run. I'm sorry man, but either way it goes, you're still alive and have the world ahead of you.
- BusterBoy0
My marriage is fine at the moment, but if it ever got to the stage we were headed for divorce, I would always put my kids first. I just could NEVER stomach the thought of my kids only seeing me on my 'designated day'. I also could never stomach the thought of any other man having an influence on the upbringing of my children. NEVER.
Consequently, I would probably just elect to stick it out until my kids were old enough to take care of themselves, as hard as that may be.
- ali0
I recommend reading this book it will help you and your wife in making the decision about whether the relationship is worth saving or giving up on and may give you both different perspective on the situation. Some things can be fixed, but it takes much effort from both partners to change and if your wife is being stubborn then it may be really hard for you to save it. I think it's more important that your kids respect you and that you are happy so you can give them all the love they need than to stay in a negative environment. Otherwise your relationship problems may become their relationship problems.
- TheeOtherJuan0
<------THREE WEEKS TODAY DIVORCED.
- watchamakalit0
I think were on the same boat...
just hang in there...wait till the wife wakes up.
then bang her!
- pauli0
Dude, this is an easy fix.
- pauli0
The first thing you must understand is that the world around you is an illusion.
- pauli0
If you were to get a divorce today, you would replace your wife with a woman who would inevitably reenact the current scenario. So, thought a divorce would relieve you of some of the current pressure and guilt, the problem lies far deep than you can ever realize.
- pauli0
The problem with most Men today is that they have a very skewed understanding of the true nature of Women. A Woman is as hard or as easy as your Skill Set that you possess to control the situation that she presents to you.
- pauli0
The second thing you MUST UNDERSTAND is by the looks of it, she is most likely (not positively) fucking someone else.
By the looks of what you've written, it looks like your wife is show ALL the telltale signs of a Woman is taking in another Man's Programing, ie, THE DICK!
- pauli0
I would snoop around just a little, to be sure she's not Fucking Some other dude! I would put my money on that trip to "grooming school" is a trip to "grooming" school. This usually happens when a "modern" woman starts to experience taste of the American Work Environment.
- You know, deep down inside I was thinking the same... as bad as it soundsOSFA