Roommate Stories?
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- spendogg0
When i was going to school I had this roomate who was dating this chick who was a little crazy and he would come home with these crazy fucked up notes on his car - he would find them at work and at home - it was all non sequiter "i know where you are and what you're doing" - then the word Prick and Asshole started being written on his car in shoe polish - for a solid week he was totally losing his mind and broke up with the crazy chick and it all stopped when he threatend to call the cops.
Turns out it was my girlfriend just fucking with him cuz he called her cousin a fat ass to someone and she overheard - that chick was awesome. I laugh everytime i think about that. ahhhh the good ol days.
- Jaline0
hahaha @ spendogg
- ross0
my roomate in school had the biggest penis hole ever.
Once, he dropped me of a high fence of a castle when we were drunkly playing "sercet agent".
He laughed and lit a cig and flicked it down to me.
i layed there with my knee folded the wrong way.
- ********0
I actually have a good story, but I was "that guy" and will not incriminate myself.
- shellie0
I actually have a good story, but I was "that guy" and will not incriminate myself.
morilla
(Jun 27 07, 12:27)Now that you've said that... We're all picturing the worst. the best thing you can do now is still it.
- mg330
OMG I totally forgot the other thing I'd do to the third roommate!
He wasn't in school, but worked full time. The main roommate and I were students, always made sure we had later classes to sleep in that year, but Lucas didn't know our schedule.
He and I shared a bathroom, he'd get up at like 5:30.
One time when I went to bed I left the shower running as hot as it would go and the light on in the bathroom with the door closed so it seemed like I was in there. We had amazing hot water, nonstop, never ran out.
All I wanted to do was for him to open the door and gag at how steamy and hot it was, but turns out he thought I was in the shower and waited around for nearly an hour before he stuck his head in there! :D
Not only was he late to work, the bathroom was so thick with steam and like a million degrees inside, he couldn't even get ready for work because he was sweating like a madman. I had made sure to close the AC vent as well and even put a towel at the base of the door with just enough removed to see that the light was on.
- shellie0
Spelling: *spill*
- _salisae_0
i lived with my brother sinclair for a little bit and he and his friend went out one night drinking whisky and driving his truck slinging his bat at mailboxes .. then his friend pulls out his gun and start shooting trash cans.
so i had just returned from class and had to study for an exam the next morning and they come rushing in and say to turn off all the lights and get down on the floor the cops are after them.
taken by surprise i go along .. we're all laying on the floor and the search light is roaming all over the house making it an impossibility to move.
after about 2 or 3 minutes my brother starts snoring! he and his friend had passed out and i'm left to wait out the cops with no means to study.
ha. that night sucked.
- ********0
it involves 3 days,23 ruffinols, public indecency, getting kicked in the head by a navy seal, 6 cops weapons drawn, a squatters warehouse, 24 hour bi night club and samurai swords.
long story, see if I can condense it.
- Jaline0
after about 2 or 3 minutes my brother starts snoring! he and his friend had passed out and i'm left to wait out the cops with no means to study.
ha. that night sucked.
_salisae_
(Jun 27 07, 12:33)hahaha
although I'm sure it would have been horrible knowing you had to study.
- ********0
Hahaha I liked how he passed out while hiding out from the cops, haha.
- shellie0
I always thought my ex roommate would have killed herself in the house while I was there if didn't go. It's crazy when someone tells you stuff like "I want to chop my arm off" with a straight face. She wasn't some weird goth looking chick either -- just some serious major instance problems. I don't know how she ever got as far away as she did from her parents. I've met them and they don't seem to be the type to kick a troubled daughter out on her own if she can't really take care of herself.
That whole situation still really bothers me. I wonder if she's still alive or whatever.
- canuck0
My roommate burned fries one night in the apartment. Anyway I was just about to leave for my teaching placement, when i decided to see what the funk was all about. I opened the oven and a wall of black smoke hit me like a kick in the face. I didn't have time to change. I just went onto my placement. All day, I heard the children whispering to each other, about the funky smell, I had acquired. One of them said, Mr. Cleary smells like BBQ.
Other roommate stories at a glance:
Returning one day to a male roommate dancing and singing to Britney spears in his under pants.
Returning to see a roommate fornicating on the kitchen table.
Having my roommates friends steal, property from the house.
Having roommates take large shits, and not flushing the toilet.
Finding suspicious body fluids in the shower.
Seeing a friend of a roommate take a piss in the fish tank.
- mrdobolina0
one time I was drinking 40's and puffing reefer with my roommates. We had a pretty major roof deck and a screen door, that when it was nice out, we would just leave wide open. We had this stray cat we took in named "Target"
A bird flew in the screen door and was in the house for about a millisecond and Target swatted that fucker to the carpet and it was dead. The whole scene was kinda surreal. we let the cat eat the bird on the roof.
- ********0
Hahah, not to turn the self-induced deathwish commentary into something funny ... but it reminds me of my friend’s friend who came to visit us one time.
We were all out having a good time (I am always having a good time and rarely notice or are if other people are not), and I got to talking to this girl and she pointed and went, "Do you know that kid?"
And I look and it’s my new friend, and say something to the effect of, "Yea, look at him, you’d think someone that ugly wouldn’t be able to talk to girls has hell frozen over?"
Not even to a chuckle, so I am like, okay fuck this... she goes ...
"Yea, he came over to me and my friend and said if one of use didn’t talk to him he was going to kill himself."
I fucking lost it.
What a line.
I never had the balls to use it myself.
After getting to know him better, I am sure he was only half joking. He is the type of kid who always wears basketball shorts underneath his pants ... just in case a game might happen, hahah.
- _salisae_0
he was raised on a farm if that helps clear things up
- ********0
I am going to Saint Clair on Friday to see my family for the weekend!!
I am so excited!
Your brother’s name somehow managed to make me even more amped, haha.
- rusty_hooker0
Your brother’s name somehow managed to make me even more amped, haha.
flavorful
(Jun 27 07, 12:52)GAY?
- ********0
Not that I need to explain to rusty_pirate_hooker, but his name is Sinclair, haha.
- ********0
I wouldn’t fuck your mom for practice.