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- PonyBoy0
ewwww!! WHAT THE FUCK are you doing, Wyatt?!!
I'm on Ep 5 of Season 3 of Ozark... have a vomit receptacle on hand @ about 38:00.
Just doing what I feel is my duty to the public... you have been warned. <3
- ty :)sted
- Ageist!thumb_screws
- But seriously, blurghhhh.thumb_screws
- Continuity0
One unexpected unpleasant consequence of this whole quarantine business is the number of exes/women I've dated reaching out. Eek.
- what what did you do?pango
- Reply drily and neutrally. No need for these ships to try and sail back to port.Continuity
- ya. i agree.pango
- Gardener12
my lockdown plan for the next few weeks involves recording mixes of my 7" singles, all pretty random with well known tunes alongside the odd stuff and then broadcast them on Friday nights. I have already started mixing and can tell you that the first one will feature Nick Nicely, Banana Splits and Chas & Dave, amongst other hits.
- colin_s2
i'm wondering what april fool's day pranks are going to go too far this year
- Nairn0
I dearly wish Britain's unter-Royals would just stfu with their hearty assurances and encouraging tweets, etc.
We dearly need a clear out after this is all over.
Celebrities too, probably.
- Never a better time to get rid of the whole lot of them.PhanLo
- kate mcann urging people to stay inside broke mekingsteven
- Oh noes, she did?
Heyzeus Kristo.Nairn - Motorised guillotine for all!OBBTKN
- I am one of the 'boot lickers' (as phanLo puts it) to a degree, wherein I see a certain value to at least some of the cunts. But most of them should go get jobsNairn
- For some reason, some people need Betters to look up to. I don't get it, but meh, it serves a purpose. And yeah, Tourism, although that can be set in historyNairn
- Just saying this as a Basque friend was totally aghast when I and a mutual friend weren't utterly against the existence of the Royals, OB :)Nairn
- drgs4
My company is implementing 50% temporary lay-off for all employees.
It's 40% lay off for me, ie I will be working 3 days a week.For the 40% lay off time the government is paying full salary for the first 20 days, and after that ca. 70% of full salary (so its 100%*60%+40%*70% = 88% of my salary).
Because communism
- drgs3
1. You ever do drunk online shopping late at night, forget about it and then receive a surprise package a few days later?
I just received a home test kit for Helicobacter Pylori, bacteria which causes stomach ulcers. (I don't have Helicobacter Pylori.)2. Went for a bike trip yesterday. My front wheel looked flat, so I decided to reach out and give it a squeeze to see how much air is in there... while pedaling.
I don't know if it's the corona virus, I think I am losing my mind... On top of this I had diarrhea two days ago.
- time to challenge you at chess! might be my only chance to get somewhere past the mid-gameKrassy
- yeah, I ordered a replacemnt bulb for my long-unused lava lamp, to give my daughter something to look at in these housebound times.Nairn
- I completely forgot, til I received an email notification that it'd had been sent a couple of days after. Except, I managed to put the wrong address and tel #Nairn
- So I'm highly unlikely to get it any time soon. Well done, me.Nairn
- (well, address was right - but, it was my studios, where there's no mailbox (yeah, I know). Also, order system had picked up an old tel # No idea how.)Nairn
- studios are shut so no mail unless someone happens to be here and hears a knock at the door, no delivery.
Quel désastre.Nairn - Isn't Helicobacter Pylori indicative of other problems though - what had you been reading that night otherwise?Nairn
- I think I was looking for a corona test kitdrgs
- How odd - they've just written to me saying they'll re-send, so I've asked them to send to my home. Thank you, QBN God?Nairn
- Masks train you not to touch your face. Actual virus transfer by air is exceedingly rare unless you are in a room with anwagshaft
- oops...wrong thread.wagshaft
- Nairn3
It's too late now, but I think I might consider making up Pandemic Packs for sale in preparation for the next one.
As in - not cashing in nastily, but making some nice box set thing with all the hygiene-based necessities - gloves, masks, alcohol and wipes, etc. Perhaps some illustrated booklet with advice and links to resources. Each box 'a fortnight' or 'a month' or whatever.
Fuckit, perhaps I should look into how well organised the British prepper market is - it's pretty much saturated in the States.
- do itmoldero
- Research the Japan earthquake kit market - they have similar packs. Each house has one. Backpack to grab incase of earthquake, all you need to survive. inc foodshapesalad
- https://www.youtube.…shapesalad
- Can you make something for an impact event? You'll be an instant billionaire!
https://en.wikipedia…utopian - Comet Atlas on it's way...robotron3k
- zarkonite4
"INTRODUCING THE ONE CLUB COVID-19 JOBS BOARD"
https://www.oneclub.org/articles…
Sharing because this might come in handy for a lot of us...
- NBQ007
The earth was created 4.5+ billion years ago. And then QBN.
I love you all.
- kingsteven3
my bin collections have been a bit off for the last fortnight. the recycling didn't get picked up and then the food/garden waste got moved from wednesday to monday. the council say it's back to normal tomorrow (recycling day again). i will keep you all updated on the situation.
- Nairn0
I doubt this will be a popular post, but -
Is it just me, or are Studio Ghibli flicks generally a bit.. shit?
We've been going through them on Netflix and they're not quite as amazing as either I remember (in those I've seen) or most people harp on (those I'd not seen).
Sure, the art's mostly beautiful and some of the worlds and imagination are fantastic (looking at you, Spirited Away), but I basically fall asleep half way through them or get to the end credits and wonder why the fuck I just wasted a couple of hours of my life. Mind you, I do this with quite a few movies these days. Perhaps my attention span has been neutered by tech.
We're going through in a weird order, but I'm kind of hesitant to watch My Neighbour Totoro again in case it's just as much bilge as Porco Rosso or Castle in the Sky, both of which I thought were, well - bad.
- "my attention span has been neutered by tech." you are a true wordsmith!stoplying
- I'd be very surprised if I've not simply regurgitated that having read it elsewhere, but these are trying times, so I'll take it :)Nairn
- falling asleep watching films = getting oldBluejam
- Mononoke still holds up. My niece n nephew love the shit out of Totoro... but yea it's kinda boring. Ghibili does something to kids imaginations.inteliboy
- Miyazaki is a genius but not going to set out to watch them. Totoro blew my mind when i was 10 + saw Spirited Away on TV not so long ago and it still stood up.kingsteven
- Spirited Away was a trip visually and to some degree conceptually, but was an incoherent, almost school-kid writ, arbitrary pile of twaddle otherwise.Nairn
- haha go and make a cup of tea over the bit where the boy, that is ALSO a dragon confesses to ALSO being "the river you lost your shoe in when your were young"kingsteven
- Archive bump - what did you mean by ' go and make a cup of tea over'? But yeah, shitlike that was impenetrable. Like schoolkid story-writing.Nairn
- oh i mean, the films are great up until the end where he tries to tie together the story. you may as well change the channel/ make a cup of tea/leave the roomkingsteven
- aah, right - I thought it was some peculiar Nornism I'd never come across, or something, haha :)Nairn
- hah, i definitely have a strong connection with making tea as a unit of procrastination. it's like something roy walker would say to lead in to an ad break :Dkingsteven
- robotinc6
My wife and I are expecting in Sept. The last year and a half of our lives have been crazy building up to this (moving back across the world, repatriating, new jobs, bought a house, had a miscarriage).
I'm both super excited to be expecting, and frightened about covid. We have a prenatal visit in another week, but need to weight the risks of coming in vs the exposure. We also need to figure out our plan if one of us gets sick. We have a fragile social network in our new city.
Anyone else pregnant right now?
- Nope, but I echo your concerns about support networks now we have a 13 month old - we have no family in LDN and the friends who we'd trust fucked offNairn
- abroad to look after their parents etc weeks ago, when they saw the writing on the wall.Nairn
- Also - congratulations!
Spend the next 6 months sleeping! :)Nairn - Also expecting September. New York City. Life is so intense. I rented & sanitized a car because we don't trust an Uber to the clinic right now.nb
- Congrats too, nb!
Good luck to the both of you - hope you've got a good mattress for when She gets big and can't sleep well!Nairn - Me, expecting in May. Luckily my wife is on pregnancy leave and i'm working at home.
Stay safedmay - Hoping for the healthiest and safest outcomes for you guys. Congratsstoplying
- Congrats! And yes, put your body in hibernation til septOBBTKN
- That felt good to write, and better to read the comments. Many thanks!robotinc
- Please explain how one gets sleep these days.nb
- nb-1
(from the NY Times)
We think of digital information as near perfect now, but in 100 years or so, some kid doing a very obscure assignment for a history class is going to spend at least a couple hours deciphering this kind of lazy writing.
- Maybe "lazy" is too harsh.nb
- It’s short and succinct and correct.monospaced
- But not timeless.nb
- lol, oooooooooo kkaaaaay thenmonospaced
- "others made memes" flol
band name right therehans_glib - the late capitalists communicated only in cliche and shared points of cultural reference, often in the form of anecdotal quotes or 'tweets'kingsteven
- Am I the only one who thinks a flashing red and white Empire State building would be the last thing emergency workers would want to see on their days off??robotron3k
- Why would you ask that bobo?monospaced
- deathboy-3
fuck. get appraisal pictures and looks like builder still fucked up my goddamn island. drawing and meetings and even looking at an example and saying yes, but this will be square and them saying yes... not end of the world horrible. probably should just be happy to move in before the credit/construction freezes. but jeez with drawing and explicitly stating back to me the square vs curved...
- cool story bropango
- are they not all so cool. you dont need to add thatdeathboy
- Anything can be a kitchen island if you’re brave enough.shapesalad
- if you emailed him the spec I'm surprised you didn't end up with a staircase. No offence.Fax_Benson
- Did you sent him 50 short emails, instead of just trying to write a single, concise explanation?dmay
- If it's anything like your understanding of capitalism, what you're calling an island is actually a built in banquet or something.i_monk
- extremly cool story bro, yaawnnneverscared
- lol guys, funnymonospaced
- Got an apology. Theyd be happy to fix 5k of shit. But eh it's fine. They'll toss a few g to the backyard for being easydeathboy
- Sometimes acknowledging mistakes and working through them is beneficial for both partiesdeathboy
- I think the cabinet install is a bit sub par for my tastes however tile looks superb. Got a couple things to fix. But overall the house is soliddeathboy
- cool coolpango
- sarahfailin0
Where's all the april fool's shit this year?
- Krassy0
where are the QBN April Fool's logos?
- doggydoggdog0
What's with rips in jeans?
Distressed used to be a thing but how do you even wash these?
- Imagine working in the factory in Asia and having to put holes in new clothes?doggydoggdog
- Okay boomer?
My mom asked the same thing in the early 90smonospaced - i thought people don't wash jeans.pango
- I got sent home for wearing jeans like this to school in the late 80's.fooler
- Bangladesh guys get paid $1 a week to use sanders to grind and wear down those newly made jeans. It's not even eco friendly. But it is Retard Friendly.shapesalad
- I believe you wash them at 30c, keep dark and whites separate and follow the instructions on your preferred laundry detergent regarding quantity required.shapesalad
- Attached by wolvesmisterhow
- This is my sense of humor! Right on, QBN!SimonFFM
- mg330
I was going to do an April Fool's joke on our community's NextDoor app, but the world right now... I don't think anyone would find this funny. I was going to post:
Subject Line: Where do I pour all this used cooking grease if I don't have a storm drain on my street to pour it down?
Message: I have a dozen coffee cans filled to the brim with cooking grease, and I used to do what my dad did when I was kid and just pour them down as storm drain to reuse the cans.But we don't really have gutters or storm drains on my street. What should I do with this?
--
I know there are some people on NextDoor who would get my sense of humor, but everyone's so tense these days, doesn't seem wise.- I don't know this joke is so fricken hilarious you should maybe go for it. If not, you're depriving the world of A-material gold standard priceless humor! :)nb
- Done. Changed my name to Cliff Shiffman. LOLmg33
- eh? this is way to subtle for me. what am i missing? anything?scruffics
- I was being sarcastic. My point being that no one gets jokes on forums.nb
- Including mine, apparently.nb
- So. I got nbs joke no problem. Still not getting yours mgmonospaced
- LOL
at people not getting the joke. including me. XDpango - bennnsplain plsrenderedred
- PonyBoy-4
where's that bernie sanders tiger meme? saw it here on qbn yesterday but can't find it...
- https://i.kym-cdn.co…nb
- nah... it's related to that tiger documentary that just came out... something about it not being fair that some people get 100 tigers when the rest can afford 1PonyBoy
- probably saw it elsewhere...PonyBoy
- found it!
https://i.imgur.com/…PonyBoy - ha!robotron3k
- Wow that's a real let downnb