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- kona1
Overall I think #1 has legs and I agree with the comments above.
Font and font weight need to be addressed.
The anchor is throwing me off. I don't care for the triangle points. Perhaps explore something a bit more like this...
I'd try and simplify the lighthouse top a bit as well.
Good luck and great first round!
- fyoucher11
Is this a sailing school? What's the significance of the anchor and lighthouse?
Not sure if I dig the anchor and lighthouse idea, the anchor feel a bit cartoonish compared to the lighthouse. Maybe the lighthouse is on top of the anchor rather than morphing into it.
It all feels a bit crammed and busy too, nothing really stands out, too much competition between elements -- i think mostly from the black ribbon in the middle. Perhaps think about simplifying things, like getting rid of the inner fills or even all the fills, less colors, and maybe think about another treatment for the stuff in the ribbon, maybe that's wrapped at the bottom.
I like the light rays from the light house but think the only one that might work well with print is the one up top where its not overlapping other important elements.
Not a bad start though
- Beeswax0
Thanks for all the great feedback.
Why anchor?
This is a University with ties to some Catholic tradition and network. Anchor is their symbol of Christianity, My initial idea was to create a hidden cross over the anchor with the lights of the lighthouse.Why Lighthouse?
The school is in Palos Verdes, a neighborhood of LA. Their landmark is this exact lighthouse.
The university is also situated on top of a hill overlooking the ocean.Their slogan is also happened to be "Direct us by thy light" (Tua Luce Dirige)
So I incorporated all these elements. Clients hasn't seen this yet, they might ask me to remove some of these main elements but I wanted it to be more definitive/descriptive of their location & ideals.
This is a rebranding project, their current name is Marymount California University, and there are 9 Marymount Universities with some of them being in California, they are tired of getting mixed by these other institutions, so this will be presented to their board with the hopes of persuading them to change the name of the school.
- dbloc1
Try green instead of brown. Looks like a desert island.