girlfriend or career
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- joelski
So here is the deal. I work as a freelance designer in sydney...i have my own studio and a handful of clients that gets me by and hire other contractors when I get more jobs then I can handle...the work is O.K but I feel I need to be inspired....local scene here is really adversing focused not design agency focused the industry is too small and there is only a handful of good design studios that wold expect you to work for peanuts...but thats another story
I have been seeing this girl for a year an a half...I am pretty sure i want to marry her..first chick in a long time I am sure about...I really do love her....... but we are at different stages of life....just before I met her I won a green card to the US lottery and i guess my dream was to work for 2 years in NYC for an experience...I am 30 years old she is 23....she just found out she might get in to medicine in canberra 4 hour drive from me....she doesn't know if she should take it...but I don't want her resenting me if she doesn't....I don't think I would move there as canberra is kind of a dead city and it would effect our relationship....So do I ditch the girl and move to nyc and try my luck there...even though this could be the love of my life....or stick around and try do the long distance thing seeing here every 2 weeks for the next 4 years and stay in sydney with my average job or move in to adversting...obviously NYC is a dream but not enough to resent her for making me stay though....
on another note can you guys send me some links to brand/design (across media) focused agencies based in NY I don't want to work in advertising doing banner campaigns i NY...places similar to method.com and hyperakt design group
thoughts???
- PSYKHO0
In this country, you gotta make the money first. Then when you get the money, you get the power. Then when you get the power, then you get the women.
- Scarface! Yeah!fyoucher1
- Ohhh another Lykis listener!
For those who do not know him, he is a Talk radio DJ www.blowmeuptom.com
Listen to just one hour of this guy!TheeOtherJuan - That line is from Scarface, the movie. Not from a talk radio dj.fyoucher1
- Tom Lykis is the definition of disgusting, sexist, self-centered fat slob of a forever single man.mg33
- I'd rather not listen to boring ass tom lykis or however you spell his name.Point5
- ********0
unlucky mate, that's a shite decision to have to make.
- anairn0
Plenty more fish in the sea.
- kelpie0
not to be a cunt, but the 'every 2 weeks for 4 years' thing is unlikely to work. 6 months, maybe a year, but any longer and I reckon you're fucked mate. good luck on your decision.
- totally agree. I've been in such situation and it worked out just beacuse we saw each other quite frequentlyFariska
- mia_free0
there may be a problem if your even asking yourself this (?)
- TheBlueOne0
Think of where you'll be in two years in either case..what will you regret most?
- You don't want to end up resenting her, even though it doesn't sound like she is stopping yourodzilla
- amongthemasses0
Money first. Play later.
- 23kon0
Hard decision
if its meant "to be" though then the living/studying/working apart and seeing each other every week or whatever will work.
- chossy0
ask her to put it off for two years she is young, then once you have done the NYC thing if she does not have a new carreer in NYC move back so she can do her medicine job :) piece of piss good luck, love changes everything love makes all the rule love changes changes everything don't move too fast if you want your love to last love lasts love her.
- +1alicetheblue
- If she's in medicine, this is terrible advice, chossy - she'll need as much time as she can to make something of herselfanairn
- and, quite why it should be her out of the two who has to put her career on hold, i just don't understand.anairn
- because she is younger that is why, it is only two years.chossy
- If she's intending to be anything 'above' nurse level, these are the years in her life she needs to get her head down.anairn
- ..er.. 'down'.
anairn - I disagree. She should get into it right away, or she'll be old by the time she is finished.Jaline
- bullshit old, she is 23, thats a good few years younger than me, get her to come with you homes :Dchossy
- D_Dot0
You're young, she's younger. Things will change, and you'll regret not taking the leap. End it on a good note, and maybe you can try again in a few years.
- Rushmore0
A few of my thoughts in no particular order:
- Long distance relationships don't work in the long run.
- If you are unhappy with work you will be unhappy with your life and that will eventually strain your relationship with this girl.
- A girl is not worth giving up a dream for.
- And long distance can work. My wife and I did 2 years apart before marriage - we made it through.TheBlueOne
- thats a hard calljoelski
- in general LDR's don't work most of the times.. of course you are an exceptionJordy
- i did 4yrs away just after i started seeing my missus . been married for 8yrs now..._me_
- alright i'll give you that one.. i know plenty that broke up LDR, including meJordy
- How did you meet your wife though, tBO? I seem to recall your circumstances were a bit different to hometown girl..anairn
- kezza_20
There are some great ad agencies in Sydney.
I would move to NYC personally. She is prepared to move away from you for her job, so clearly doesnt feel the same way you do anyway. I'd be a selfish as she's being. lots of women in NYC.
23 and 30 is a bit of a gap in terms of what you want out of life.
- joelski0
thats some good advice rushmore....
- ********0
Careerfriend.
- SkyPoo0
There's a practical limitation to your plan. If you go and work in NY you can expect only one working week off as holiday in any financial year for your first two years, then two weeks in your third and fourth. Not much time for taking 13 hour flights to Canberra and back.
Ditch her. Make the move. Look at it rationally, not with your heart. She's young and will change. You might follow her to a dead end town and get lost there forever.
- ********0
pics of the girl please, so we can descide for you.
- OSFA0
Gosh! haven't you guys seen romantic movies or Sex and the City? Make the move dude, and love will reunite both somewhere one day and you'll live happily ever after...
OR, talk to her, after all, you have to know where she stands. She's probably made up her mind about leaving and you're going crazy thinking about this.
BTW, we need pics in order to elaborate....
- dyspl0
my advice is quite influenced by the fact I didn't get & H1B visa and missed a hige work opportunity.
I'd say there's so many people trying the green card lottery, and you have won one. Don't miss that.