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House Abuse 7979 Responses

Last post: 4 months ago | Thread started: Jul 21, 08, 11:31 a.m.

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  • detritus

    One of my best chums is going to Italy with his bord for a few days and has left me with his house keys so I can pop 'round and water his plants*.

    In the vein of office pranks involving silver-foiling everything in a cubicle, what can I do to make his return home more memorable than his crappy holiday?

    Actually, the silver foil example was crap - I'll only want to spend a minimum of time abusing his house/trust/sense of privacy - what pranks can I pull with 15 minutes of effort?

    1) Shit in the fridge.
    2) Don't water the plants... ha ha ha!

    * yes, I am that old.

    Jul 21, 08, 11:31 a.m. – Permalink
  • Llyod

    grow up

    • God bless you.– Antonelli1/3
      Thanks, that's particularly sterling advice coming from you, Llyod.– detritus2/3
      nice.– Jaline3/3
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    Dog-earJul 21, 08, 11:33 a.m. – Permalink
  • doesnotexist

    how about do something nice? asshole.

    • I am doing something nice, asshole.– detritus1/3
      haha, shitting in the fridge = nice? my mistake!– doesnotexist2/3
      Of course I'm not going to shit in his fridge, jesus man - that phrase is just a QBN meme!– detritus3/3
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    Dog-earJul 21, 08, 11:33 a.m. – Permalink
  • Ravdyk

    swap the interiors of the rooms?

    • haha, that would be pretty great actually! i don't remember the fridge being in the? wait!? what room am i in?!– lvl_131/2
      this snds awesome. swap the lounge for the bedroom.– airey2/2
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    Dog-earJul 21, 08, 11:34 a.m. – Permalink
  • harlequino

    Can't go wrong with a couple dead hookers strategically placed. Like in front of the tv, with the remote in hand.
    "Hahaha! She's not supposed to be there! LOLZ!"

    • she makes a better door than she does a window– 7point341/5
      Hmm. This could end up expensive. Could I get the same effect from dead kittens?– detritus2/5
      Yes. On the extreme side, but sure.– harlequino3/5
      D'oh! Kittens don't watch TV!
      Hmm.. maybe if I put condoms straggling out of their bottoms?      – detritus4/5
      Now you're talkin.– harlequino5/5
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    Dog-earJul 21, 08, 11:34 a.m. – Permalink
  • canuck

    Re -arrange all the shit in his cupboards.

    • I was kinda thinking about swapping all the food can covers. K, adding that to the list.– detritus
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    Dog-earJul 21, 08, 11:35 a.m. – Permalink
  • Llyod

    do an ass pennies with the silver ware

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    Dog-earJul 21, 08, 11:36 a.m. – Permalink
  • mjg

    make him a romantic dinner for his return with candles and wine

    • PIITB!– Antonelli1/2
      what they choose to do afterward is up the them....– mjg2/2
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    Dog-earJul 21, 08, 11:36 a.m. – Permalink
  • 7point34

    fart on a cake?

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    Dog-earJul 21, 08, 11:36 a.m. – Permalink
  • ninjasavant

    swap out all of his wall decoration with artistic nudes

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    Dog-earJul 21, 08, 11:37 a.m. – Permalink
  • grayhood

    super glue all his interior doors and cabinets shut.

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    Dog-earJul 21, 08, 11:37 a.m. – Permalink
  • Antonelli

    clog his drains with your pubes.

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    Dog-earJul 21, 08, 11:37 a.m. – Permalink
  • ninjasavant

    sell his house

    • lol... I wish I had the balls (/money to pay for it all :)
      Perhaps after the next million..      – detritus
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    Dog-earJul 21, 08, 11:38 a.m. – Permalink
  • Llyod

    set fire to the house

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    Dog-earJul 21, 08, 11:38 a.m. – Permalink
  • vanilla_cam

    saran wrap over the toilet is always a hit when he comes home and pisses all over the floor...

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    Dog-earJul 21, 08, 11:38 a.m. – Permalink
  • jasontroj

    • <----I'd love to be in a party with him in charge.– omgitsacamera1/2
      I never noticed the naked kid– Llyod2/2
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    Dog-earJul 21, 08, 11:38 a.m. – Permalink
  • D_Dot

    Bolt a nude picture of yourself over his bed

    • Actually - this has got legs - I could photograph myself, nude, frottaging all his cookware, but not give him– detritus1/7
      the photos for a couple of weeks..– detritus2/7
      < hahhaa– canuck3/7
      hahaha ya that sounds better. sauce pan jock strap.– D_Dot4/7
      Friends of a friend made a calendar of nude pics of themselves in a house the were looking after...– locustsloth5/7
      ...and gave the owners the calendar– locustsloth6/7
      Nice, locust. I'm ..slightly.. uncomfortable with the idea of purposefully leaving nude pics of me with a best chum though!– detritus7/7
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    Dog-earJul 21, 08, 11:38 a.m. – Permalink
  • pencilpants

    glue everything to the ceiling

    • My Dad did that to someone back in the 80s, when he worked down in the Falklands– detritus
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    Dog-earJul 21, 08, 11:38 a.m. – Permalink
  • harlequino

    badger in the toilet.

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    Dog-earJul 21, 08, 11:40 a.m. – Permalink
  • omgitsacamera

    Get a melon and stick it somewhere so it stinks up the place.

    BETTER: A durian fruit.

    • Hidden Durian = nasty!!– eegrek
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    Dog-earJul 21, 08, 11:40 a.m. – Permalink
  • detritus

    Anyone got a recipe for mixing up some theatrical cum?

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    Dog-earJul 21, 08, 11:41 a.m. – Permalink

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