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So my mom cracked the news that she and my stepdad are on the path to divorce after 20 years. Stepdad (who I haven't talked to since labor day) says he wants kids and id leaving my mom.
Man, I remember my mom and dad splitting when I was a kid and how damaging that was to me, but this time I just feel for my mom. It's a shitty thing no matter which way you look at it. Hopefully it doesn't get ugly.
mine just stopped living together but remained married till I was in my teens, then my dad got remarried,
still they remained in good terms and I guess that helped us not feeling the divorce like the cases I see on "reality TV"
My parents' relationship started losing the plot when I was around 12; they finally split when I 16. I didn't feel like there anyone I could talk to about whilst it was all happening during those 4 years, and in the aftermath, so I kept it all bottled in. Fucked me up proper, both as a teenager and as an adult.
- Mmm. Pre-caffeine typing.Continuity
- did you tell them? when I asked both mine, they said, they still loved each other, just that they couldn't hack it anymore..GeorgesIV
- Well, it was clear my parents actually didn't love each other anymore, so that made asking them pointless.Continuity
my folks have been happily married for over 40 years but we don't speak. i partially want to say ... be happy you still have a relationship with them. but i'm also sorry that they are in their own way, going through heart break.
Sorry to hear that but if one wants kids and the other doesn't then it has to end :( hopefully it happens as amicably as these things can.
Damn son... sorry to hear. Shit is always tough on someone.
My and ex never got married but we have a little girl, it was tough for a while but now we are really good friends and hang out always do stuff as family as we realise she is a product of our time together and she is the more important thing in our lives and we must always remember her well being is way above ours... And she is one of the happiest 6 years olds you will every meet.
Sorry to hear your news cannonball. My mum and dad split up when I was 5, mum re-married when I was 10 only for her new husband to leave her for my big sister (honestly).
Learn from their mistakes and do everything you can to stay positive for you, your family, and your mum especially. Sadly my mum has passed away now , but the remaining years of her life were her best. Love her, distract her, keep her positive. The key thing is to learn from their mistakes and do everything in your power to not let your marriage end this way, if, or when you get married.
Having my own kids now, me and my wife have been through some tough times, just stick at it, life gets better.
A least you get a Playstation 4 out of it.
1st divorce I was only 1 yr old, but that's when my biological parents split.
2nd divorce was my Mom divorcing my scumbag ex-stepdad when I was 14.
3rd was my Stepmom divorcing my junkie father this year after he bounced for 2 mos to get doped out of his skull and wouldn't return calls from friends or family.
Let's talk when you get to three!
Mine divorced when I was 3 so I don't remember anything regarding that.
so your mom and stepdad have been married 20 years and they're just talking about kids now? She's already been through the 'having and raising kids' phase in her life; I'm assuming you're an adult (35 - judging by your username?).
I'm 34, my mom is 60 - probably wouldn't even be healthy for her to try and have a kid, not to mention the slim chance of conception after 40.
but - sorry to hear about the split. my parents divorced when I was 11 and it fucked my brother and me up quite a bit.
My parents split when i was 14, it didn't affect me because all they did was fight anyway. My mom was a controlling church nut and my dad was a carpenter/craftsman genius who kept constantly busy in any project he could find just to avoid their crazy confrontations. As a kid I was for the divorce, I felt bad for my dad and what he had to deal with, and I couldn't wait for the day I was able to leave that controlling environment. I cant say that for my sister though, she was younger and didn't really know what was going on, she was more concerned with being popular in school (fuckin 80's) but apparently it affected her and she blames my dad till this day, Where I felt for my dad since I was a kid, he lives with me now, he had a bad stroke, I take care of him 'n shit, fuck old folks homes, those are for white peoples parents.
- I'm white and my family has already taken care of our elders. Old folks homes are places you put someone you want to forget aboutd_rek
- want to forget aboutd_rek
- < im gonna put my mom in that shit, hahah, kidding,moldero
- thats good though, shows a lot about someone who takes care of the weak, especially when they took care of usmoldero
This is all too sad for a Friday.
my parents split too when i was a teenager. shit happens.
Parental Divorce Deluxe ©
it sucks, plain and simple.
my mum and dad split when i was 15, and at the time i didn't get on with my pops at all. So for me it was kind of a blessing, my mum is great and was easy to live with, but for all my siblings it was horrific. i am second eldest of 6 kids (8 if you include my step dads) so to watch all the younger ones getting cut up was terrible.
my mum got together with my now step dad, who coincidentally is the father to my eldest sister (they were togther before my mum met my dad, got preggers and my step dad was forced to leave my mum via his splendid parents) and they are still together now. silver linings and all that.
i am a step dad myself. my partner is 5 years older than me, she has 3 kids from her previous chap. it is not easy. he creates most if not all the issues we go through, but we wont be beaten by his jealousy (self proclaimed).
You're about my age, right CannonBall?
So how old is your stepdad now? Seems like he might be a little late to catch the baby bus, which is fairly selfish in itself, particularly so where your mum's concerned.
Sorry to hear - I just hope your Mum can find someone .. well, I'm in no position to say 'better', but less-selfish, perhaps.
Step-dad seems to resemble a douche-bag. Maybe drag your mom around to see some old friends/family? Keep the morale up! =)
All jacked up stories... wtf!
Same EXACT thing happened with my mom/stepdad 7 years ago (they were married for 25 years). Just be super-supportive of your Mom and try to spend as much time as you can with her. Step-dad was a real dick (left for a girl 10 years younger than me!). My mom was really depressed, just (somewhat) getting over it now. The thing with her is, all 5 of her kids are grown up now, all have their own kids and don't live so close anymore, older sister died of cancer a cpl years ago, and she lives all alone now and has to support herself. We all help as much as we can but I think the most important part is to spend time with her and let her know she still has family.
I always wondered why parents waited until we were teenagers to finally give up on each other. like thanks you two, i wasn't developing or becoming my own person now. yeah sure, you guys can argue over me in court then just ignore me when you start dating your new spouses. fuck you both.
totally not a bitter child of divorce.