Advice
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- autoflavour0
best advice i can give, dont turn to the internet for advice.
i know that is a bit of a self canceling statement, but seriously, find someone who actually knows you both, someone who can keep their mouth shut, and get their thoughts.
13 years is a good long time, and it shouldnt be disregarded.. but it is also NOT a reason to stick it out, purely because you have lasted this long.
- autoflavour0
also 13 years and you dont have even have shared accounts..
most people in 13 years are already married, had children, had an affair and divorced..
- moniker0
13 years is a long time.
You think you'll ever find another woman that's going to take your bullshit? You're a changed man now. Even if you managed to find someone else, who's to say the exact same thing won't happen 13 years from then?
Get married, have some kids, argue over the little shit, then get over it and repeat.
Welcome to fucking life.- It's true, life is like this, but I wouldn't throw in the towel yet, you could find someone that was in the same boat and connect********
- connect and get along nicely. Fuck that********
- It's true, life is like this, but I wouldn't throw in the towel yet, you could find someone that was in the same boat and connect
- autoflavour0
the worst thing you can do is stay in the relationship because you are afraid of not being in it..
being alone sucks, but being stuck in a loveless relationship, aint much fun either.
- ahli0
maybe consulting QBN isn't the greatest idea, but I think she's being an asshole; not inviting you to hang out? getting drunk? not pulling her weight? it would seem to me she is provoking you into action. Dump the bitch.
- moldero0
you lost me at "Citizen since: 2011."
- < THISmonospaced
- ha********
- LOL.. if you actually read this thread, you would have seen the fuck up.. Citizen since 2008autoflavour
- ah so its real, ok ill read.moldero
- He made it sound like he registered this fake username to hide his identity from people who know him on QBN...********
- CygnusZero40
The relationship has grown stale. It happens. You get bored of each other, start picking on each other. It's very common. Maybe it's time to move on if there's no way to find that spark again.
But try to end it properly, dont start getting into cheating and fucking each other over.
- jacklalane0
It seems like you have both grown apart and both aren't happy but possible in denial of the situation. As I have gotten older I have seem many long-relationships including my own crumble. It happens to everyone. When you are in your twenties your personality is still not fully formed, and you are still figuring yourself out. So growing apart after 13 years is no surprise. If there is no passion left and you are not having good sex that's a major red flag. Breaking up sucks, is messy, and you'll feel like shit for a good year but is probably the only remedy. You need to be honest to your partner and yourself put your cards on the table. Good luck and hang in there. This shit happens to many, many people.
- monospaced0
PIITB
- <monospaced
- Stay classy ben. :)TheBlueOne
- that's about as classy as it getsmonospaced
- DRIFTMONKEY0
You guys are sick of each other. People grow apart. It happens. Time to move on. Accept it. Be a man.
- but first ^monospaced
- says the man who cried during "ET"GeorgesII
- lol********
- moniker0
You're telling me it's only just happened after the 13th year?
You didn't notice shit was turning South a few years back?
- Horp0
I got into a relationship in my second year at art school. It lasted for eight years after that, living together as man and wife. Then it went the same way you are describing.
You don't have to kill it ruthlessly and walk away. You don't have to suffer for the rest of your life either.
You need to set an evening aside where you both sit down and talk it through, and you'll either both agree its over, or you'll both agree its worth saving. If the former, then its okay... you both feel the same way, and it can end amicably and swiftly without pain.
If the latter, then you'll have opened up a joint forum where you can discuss the problems honestly and identify the things you both need to do to fix stuff. Share more responsibilities, spice up the sex life, and share more social time. I reckon you also need to find some friends as well though... helps to keep stuff in perspective.
In my case, I instigated the talk, we both agreed it wasn't going anywhere, and we parted amicably. We actually continued living together for about three months as friends because we were still so close, just no longer in love.Its not as bad as you think it is.
- < well said.Jaline
- Thanks. Will you marry me now?Horp
- oh...uhh....err...um... think I need some space.Jaline
- Yeah, true. Me too.
* weeps.Horp - This advice, sounds like the work of a published writer.canuck
- The girls will be throwing themselves at you starting tomorrow.Jaline
- - we have to wait 'till tomorrow????alicetheblue
- Yeah, there's a rule.Jaline
- TheBlueOne0
Shared car, etc.
You have no kids. You have nothing really really tangible tying you to this person except routine and some pleasant memories.
There. I said it.
If you feel so confused about the situation that you're left to writing long anonymous paragraphs on the internet to hammer out your feelings - well - go out tonite, have a few stiff shots of whatever gives your spine some stiffness and get the fuck out of this downward spiral.
If the relationship was worth saving you'd have said those things to her two years ago. In person. Not anonymously on the internet well beyond the point it no longer matters.
No kids, no problem. It's all over but the shouting at this point.
Go. Don't look back.
- randommail0
2012 could be the end of the world.
Why live your last year like this?
- moldero0
Mods here got class, I see what you did there, right on.
- I actually took a screenshot of the original.employee
- way back machine work that fast?********
- its amazing how selective mods can beautoflavour
- Good work modsali
- 20020
Must be the holidays, hearing lots of girl friend problems.
- girlfriend problems are nothing compared to wife problemsTheBlueOne
- that's so 2002********
- exactly blue1moldero
- there's a reason I'm not yet married and it's because of those statements. Difficult, there's no way around it********
- CALLES0
Done this before... No clue what to give the other person for the holidays... Break up a few days before. Get back together a few days after. But i didn't care much about her
- never thought about that .. but it would totally work
autoflavour
- never thought about that .. but it would totally work
- CALLES0
But yeah seriously if both are feeling like this I don't know what would be going through my mind of the thought of being "engaged" gives me the shivers
- Iogout0
plenty o fucking fish in the sea.