Best overheard phrase
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- MrT0
Last weekend in a somewhat feral pub in rural Australia.
"... he had this pink singlet on, he looked like a freckle stretcher."
- scarabin0
i heard these from various girls while walking around burning man:
"you have a strap-on?"
"and then he peed all over my hat"
"have you seen my butthole?"
(this was asked more in a "well you should if you haven't" sort of way, rather than a "'cause i lost it" way)"i don't care about that shit, i just wanna piss and fuck"
at lightning in a bottle:
guy: "i'm no gynecologist, but..."
- cannonball19780
"Obama isn't on the ballot. How come I can't vote for Obama??"
- sherm0
in the office, at a meeting:
mgr: we should run a blog on hot MILFS
femme editor: as long as we keep that old ugly chick thats trending in the news now out of it. I don't find her sexy at all.
mgr: who <so and so?>
femme editor: Yea she definitely is not someone I would F
me: what have I done?
- cerberus0
For a better tomorrow.
- Ambushstudio0
A few days ago, a couple of teenage emo'ish kids on the street:
"I own like 3 pairs of silver shoes, but I always buy them way to small"
- raf0
I hope this translates to English well:
Teenagers in front of a school, filling in a crossword puzzle.
#1: "A person who doesn't believe in God"
#2: "A Jehova's?"
Long pause.
#1: "Nah... too long"
- dbloc0
Ah...go flick your bean, bitch.
- TheMagicSheep0
on the elevator this morning
dude 1/dude 2: polite small talk
dude1: so, does your, uh, boyfriend work here?
dude2: (slight pause) girlfriend...yeah, she's a producer.
dude1: oh ok cool
/conversation
- babaganush0
Ex girlfriend's mum after seeing Sigourney Weaver in a film
' OOh that's that woman from that film...what's it called...Monkey's In The Fog...'
- Jacque0
At a college cafeteria:
Girl 1: "She's from the Philippines?"
Girl 2: "Yeah, that's what she said. I don't think anyone knows where that is."
Girl 1: "I think we flew over the Philippines on our flight from Texas to California."
- rylamar0
Was cruising along today and I caught this conversation
Big Black Man: Hey girl, can I get some?
Little Hipster Girl: I'm sorry, that was my last cigarette.
Big Black Man: Girl, I wasn't talkin' bout no cigarette.
- vaxorcist0
In an elevator full of executives at an agency I used to work at:
"Why can't we just emphasize everything?!?"
- Knuckleberry0
lewis black & a horse:
http://www.squidoo.com/IfItWeren…
- WrappedInBooks0
Postal worker: If you wait till next week, we're getting stamps with pine cones on them.
Girl: Great!
Postal worker: Do you know what a pine cone is?
Girl: Yep!
- Raniator0
Someone who works here was at the sandwich van today and was buying soup. She then said "If I have one of these plastic spoons, will it melt?".
No shit.
- bjladams0
from a family member who has recently lost their job and weighing the possibilities:
"i've always wanted to start a social networking site. one that's aimed at like-minded thinking people. i dont think it would be that hard. you've done computer stuff- how hard can it be? - i took a course at uni about pagemaker. it'll be like facebook, but different- cause i dont like facebook. it'll be a huge success i reckon."
- pinkfloyd0
A women complaining about people getting in her way to get on the train:
"Whenever the train comes, people turn into fucken statues"