Your "Top This" Story?
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- mg33
Everyone has a go-to story for when they have to top someone else's tale of danger, excitement, awesomeness, etc.
If you're put to the test, what is your go to comeback story?
- scarabin0
when i was 15 my boy scout troop did desert survival training for two months before tackling one of the most difficult trails in the grand canyon, which required a special permit and meant that there basically wasn't a trail (and four inches of slippery gravel often separated us from a two-mile drop). despite our over-preparation we got lost, ran out of water and some of the boys started hallucinating. after 18 hours of desperately trying to reach the bottom to get to the colorado river we split into two groups. the weakest stayed behind and i and the remaining boys ditched our gear and set off for the river ourselves to filter water and bring it back. after dodging scorpions and stumbling around exhausted in the dark we finally did reach bottom, drank our fill, and managed to signal a passing helicopter while filtering more. a couple hours later it landed nearby and choppered us all out of there. we learned later in a newspaper article about us that two boys had died the week before on the same trail
- hardcoremydo
- Fuck That********
- ...and then you realised it was all a hallucination and you were still stuck dying of thirst?Projectile
- this story sounds an awfully familiar. Say an episode of I shouldn't be alive?!iheartfun
- I'm sure it felt a lot hotter for you seeing as how you were probably dressed in all black leather.sigg
- LOL @ segg********
- Get to da choppa!********
- ive seen that episode where the kid dies - I shouldn't be alivemegE
- Haha, Boy Scouts.********
- ********0
I was held hostage by Iraqi soldiers during the first Gulf War.
Top it.
- duckseason0
Tale of embarrassment:
Between the ages of 20-22 I used to go out A LOT. I had friends that were promoters, friends that hosted parties, and friends that threw parties. Essentially I had places to go every night of the week if I wanted, and could drink at a table with bottle service.
One of said nights, I went to a party in the East Village, not exactly sure exactly where exactly, anymore. Spent the night hanging out, talking, meeting new people, dancing, and drinking way too much. I ended up meeting a girl and hanging out with her the rest of the evening. Before I know it, it's 4am, the club is closing. She tells me she knows of a party going on at a hotel. I'm piss drunk and obviously wanting to stab this girls guts, so of course I go - I'm practically leading the charge to the hotel. We get to the door of the room and she suddenly remembers to tell me that it's an underwear party. Hmmm... what to do? After a few moments hesitation I said fuck it, and went in, clothes on the floor. I figure I'll just keep drinking and ultimately wont care. Looking around the room, I notice it's about two dozen girls and one other guy. Not too shabby, right? I go to ask for a drink - they only have redbull, no booze. At this point it is approaching 6am, I grab a redbull and go on my merry way. The night/morning goes on. I'm sobering up and, after four or five redbulls, just becoming tired and jittery. I end up sitting down on a bed. I notice there is a capgun on the bed, I pick it up. At this point I notice someone walking around taking pictures - it Bronques from Last Night's Party - Great... Then other dude at the party sits on the bed next to me - Great... At this point I see a flash - I just had my picture taken on a bed in a hotel holding a capgun in my underwear sitting next to another dude in his underwear... Whatever, none of my close circle of friends were into that scene, so I thought. I end up getting home around 9am, alone. Over the next days or so, I'm constantly checking LNP to see if that picture ended up on the site - but of course it did! Whatever - again, I thought no one i really cared about would ever see it. I walk into work a few days later and see said picture blown up and taped to the wall as well as numerous 8x11 copies posted all around the building. Jokes and jokes and jokes for days at my expense.
I learned that no matter how many girls are running around in their underwear at a party, if you get your picture taken with then one other dude while holding a capgun, there's no point trying to make an argument...
- please excuse spelling/grammatical errorsduckseason
- I will not, however, excuse "wanting to stab this girls guts."
+10 on that.mg33 - haha agree with mg33 on that onebigtrick
- that never happened, did it now?autoflavour
- wheres the pic?megE
- mg330
I watched a deckhand bite the nose off a 1 1/2 foot long sand shark in the Atlantic Ocean when I was about 14. I caught one while on a fishing trip, and the guy took it off my line, showed it to me, and put it up to his face and just bit the snout off, spit it out, tossed the fish into the water and goes "we hate those things, all they do is steal our bait."
I was f'ing blown away.
- mg330
I watched a deckhand bite the nose off a 1 1/2 foot long sand shark in the Atlantic Ocean when I was about 14. I caught one while on a fishing trip, and the guy took it off my line, showed it to me, and put it up to his face and just bit the snout off, spit it out, tossed the fish into the water and goes "we hate those things, all they do is steal our bait."
I was f'ing blown away.
- moldero0
Oh yeah? Well, I was hunted once. I'd just came back from 'Nam. I was hitching through Oregon and some cop started harassing me. Next thing you know, I had a whole army of cops chasing me through the woods! I had to take 'em all out--it was a bloodbath!
- meanwhile ill think of a real storymoldero
- that's 'Rambo' dude. You just described the plot of 'Rambo'.silentpost
- did they REALLY draw first blood? hmmmm?Projectile
- John, please log offgeorgesIII
- PonyBoy0
When I was 8 I fell out of a tree and fractured 6 vertebrae and my arm... my brothers put me in a wheel barrow and walked me about a 1/2 mile home - we waited about 2 hours for my mom to get home before I got to goto the hospital...
When I was in college I delivered pizzas... I literally walked into a porn in the making and was asked to join in w/two ladies... ... I pussied out.
Last year I got up to go get a coffee (gone 15 minutes from my home... max)... I return home to a bunch of cops and rescue workers pulling an SUV out of my bedroom. There was a woman in the driver's seat w/a bullet in her head... alive... yelling at the cops. They didn't even realize she had a 22 lodged in her brain until 3 hours later... ... it was her son who shot her in the head and ran... ... she survives and is doing well to this day... he's in jail of course.
- mydo0
at aged 15, I got arrested for a terrorist attack, that was actually a home made pipe bomb experiment that went wrong.
- dopepope0
I once told Elle Macpherson, to her beautiful face, if she married Darth Vader, her name would be 'Elevator'.
- lol, then what?prophet
- She didn't really laugh or anything, just gave me a blank stare.dopepope
- oh, too bad. i will imagine another scenario...prophet
- I'm amazed she didn't kick you square in the balls. walk off and then call you a fucking gimp geek.********
- It's not like models are known for their personality and sense of humor.jaylarson
- Aye, models don't laugh, gives them wrinkles.Juanmonk
- She sure isn't laughing in the picturePeter
- It's clearly shopped!Juanmonk
- hektor9110
couple of years ago some friends and i were celebrating a bachelors party at very very low-end a small town bar out of Monterrey Nuevo Leon Mex. Everything was going great we had rented a cabin up in the mountains with and awesome view and a nice grill. We got the prettiest girl at the bar, but apparently as we thought we were getting too much attention. Around 4 am my brother (who was just divorced a couple of days before) one the guest at the bar approach him, and i walked just right behind him. He took the cell phone off from the hands of my brother and asked him where are you guys from "im getting a lot of calls from my boss and they are nervous, they want to know who do you work for?" i told him that everything was cool we were just celebrating a friends bachelors party.... he gave the back the cell and walked away..... when i got inside the bar i found the my friends having a blast... i told them the situation and they were like fck that just dont stare at anyone lol i was like "dude just a couple of days ago they found two bodies beheaded WTF... he said ok lets leave by the time we were fixing to leave there was a group of mean looking guys right at us... we told the owner that we cool we mean no disrespect to anyone and he said i understand.. ( i dont want to type anymore guys)
- benfal990
I killed 6 people in 1997.
Top that.
- BannedKappa0
- he jumped on her right away. kind of a dick move.********
- LOLbenfal99
- fake23kon
- real...BannedKappa
- Client actually sounded cooler than the designer there. Nice use of sarcasm.toodee
- he jumped on her right away. kind of a dick move.
- bjladams0
spent a few months wondering around the kalahari- was held at gunpoint, almost stoned twice, had to kill animals for food and such- got married to a couple of the chiefs daughters during a ceremony one evening. saw some pretty crazy stuff as far as witch drs go. got chased out of a few villages at night by dudes with spears. caught a 12' croc. came face to face with a lion in the bush. ended up in india where i was beaten for being white- went to thailand for a few months. made my way across cambodia and into nam and back into laos for less than $50 over 3 weeks. took some literature into china for the underground schools and was taken prisoner by the military. and had many other fun adventures across europe, the south pacific and latin america... but the strangest thing has been loosing my hearing. gone totally deaf about 4 months ago and dr's cant figure out why.
- bjladams0
also snuck to the burma border to take some pics of a orphanage that had been taken over by the military. outlasted a hurricane off of cape verde, west africa. beat malaria. climbed a mt in colorado with nothing but a bottle of water and a granola bar in the snow. did 3 days of class 4 rapids with a class 2/3 boat and a spray skirt made of a coat hanger, plastic and duct tape. killed and ate a black mamba in the okavango delta. got into an alley fight with a drunk guy in germany who was following some chick. shot an ak-47 in nam. went train jumping in laos. came across a mt lion in the big south fork. learned to fly a cub piper in the everglades. and once supported the chicago bears for a game to make a friend- i'm a bit embarrassed of that one.
- mydo0
no one is going to top bjladams. i guess the thread ends here.
- mydo0
and it sounds like you need to see House.
- bjladams0
couple more and i'm off to bed:
spent a few nights under the stars in belize/guatemala with nothing but a machete. got caught in a rip in costa rica- learned to swim with the current. caught a shark, albeit it small. once went spelunking during a storm, got caught in a section of a cave where there was only about 6" air left and had to swim to the next chamber. won state, got mvp, homecoming king, got the girl- went to college and realized that none of that h.s. stuff amounted to anything, what i needed was a job. night.
- ********0
I should be dead on all account because of Jacques Cousteau.
I nearly had a head on collision on the motorway at 70mph because a car was on the wrong side of the motorway heading for me trying to escape from the police and I had no where to go but straight on.
I crashed my Kart at 80mph, went 15 feet into the air and nearly broke my back.
