Cats
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- fyoucher10
Get one of those dog bark control collars, put it on the cat. Every time the cat goes on the counter, zap his ass.
As far as the pissing goes, let's start off with the first step. Do you have a litter box?
If the litter box doesn't do the trick, maybe try different litter.
If the different litter doesn't work, put the dog bark collar around his rear end and zap him if he pisses somewhere.
If that doesn't work, get rid of the girlfriend.
- toe_knee0
No he has all that litter box stuff. girlfriend spent a fortune on the fucker. we've got jungle gyms and swinging ropes its like a fucken zoo
- hellojeehae0
meow
- mydo0
I used to hate cats. thought they were a complete waste of time. then i got conned into taking in a stray. he's awesome. never trouble. always company, never complains, always uses his litter. indeed the only bad thing he does is bat my phone onto the floor because he knows it makes me get up.
in short. leave your cat outside all winter. then take him in as a stray. he'll love you for it.
same mentality as banging a fat chick.
- MSL0
- pr20
bro i had a bunch of cats in my life so yours is either retarded or really young (and even then it's pretty mind blowing how young they are when the learn to use the box) if he still pees in your bed.
- benfal990
my girl friend got 2 female cats... 8 years old sisters. All they do is following us everywhere in the appartment, jumping on us to be petted. asking for food. they fucking take all the place in the bed. they wake up everyone at 5 AM. When they finish to take a dump, first thing they do is coming back in the bed and sit on your face. they leave fur everyfuckingwhere.. on your clothes, on the carpet, on the sofa, on the bed, on the floor, on your toothbrush and in your cereals.
- benfal990
by the way, that thread makes me laugh big time :D
cats are so fun to laugh at.
- mg330
I don't know what I'd do without my cat. She was like my first best friend when I moved to Chicago in 2001. She's been going through a rough patch for about a year by chewing and licking all the hair off her belly, and it gets fucking gross and sometimes gets gooey puss on stuff, and she had to wear a cone for nearly a year, but we're getting it figured out at the vet now, FINALLY, by putting her on cat prozac, which is making her much more calm and she's not all preoccupied with licking that damn stomach. There is nothing grosser than waking up at night to hear this "slurp, slurp, slurp" of the cat's tongue in a specific way that I know she's making her belly worse and it's gonna ooze on to my duvet cover.
But I love her to death and don't know what I'd do without her. Best thing for me is to come home and find that one of her toys is on my bed when it wasn't there when I left in the morning. It makes me happy that besides missing me all day she's actually being playful all by herself and just having some fun. :)
- toe_knee0
yeah thats another thing, why do cats insist on sticking their brown button in your face first think in the morning.
fml
- garretttt0
my cats not an asshole all the time.
but hes also gay... humps our cat statue... and when we had our older cat before he passed away... he hump him as well
and he is obsessed with being petwe all just think hes a little retarded
- lawlzflashbender
- You have a cat statue?Stian
- HAHAHAbenfal99
- Projectile0
I know, why don't you try being a cunt back to the cat.. oh wait. sorry.
- jamble0
Sounds like the cat is the reasonable one.
- airey0
for a staff member you're a whingy biatch. remember, the cat is your owner and you should do whatever it asks.
- flashbender0
perhaps you should hold it down and piss on it.
True story - my firend's cat used to piss on his pillow while he slept, one morning he rolled over - face first into a piss soaked pillow. The cat was still sleeping on the bed so he (my firend) held it down and pissed on it (the cat).
The cat never pissed in his bed again.
- HAHAHAHA.bigtrickagain
- LOL!!!!iCanHasQBN
- MEGA LOLZ !!! WTH! HAHAbenfal99
- whereRI0
HAHAHAHAHA that fuckin made me laugh, i started sprayin him in the face with vinegar! hahahaha