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Out of context: Reply #70948

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  • mg334

    My wife tripped on a rug in our hallway early yesterday morning and went eye-first right into a door jam. Got a pretty good bruise on her eye. She was exhausted from working late the night before and was pretty much sleepwalking. She was carrying our son, too; luckily he landed on his feet.

    We’re both wondering how ridiculous or plausible this sounds lest anyone in our neighborhood or coworkers she’s video-chatting with think “oh, her husband hits her...” :(

    • it doesn't matter how it happened, unless a woman saw her fall, people will think you hit your wife. no one will believe either of you.imbecile
    • I know, and that's truly ridiculous.mg33
    • indeedimbecile
    • Just tell everyone you punched her in the face. No one will think you're a liar. Problem solved!!!!
      ********
    • saw a coworker of mine on a video chat yesterday. he fell jogging last week, 30 yards from his house, and WRECKED his left eye.mg33
    • above his eyebrow there's about a 2 inch gash, probably half an inch in height. Doc said plastic surgery is needed and he's definitely going to have a scar.mg33
    • All I could think was "nobody ever thinks women hit men... he's in the clear, unlike me in our situation."mg33
    • totally. gashed my head on the hood, working on her car one day. no one ever asked if she threw something at me.imbecile
    • that's it you're a wife beater! LOLrenderedred
    • Being envious of someone who may need surgery for ‘being in the clear’, seems like you care more about what others think about you than anyone's wellbeing.sr_rosa
    • the discussion is the perception of others. no one wants to be in a setting where they feel they're being wrongly judged for incorrect speculation.imbecile
    • he can hope for the health of his neighbor while simultaneously worry his neighbors may think something ill of himself or his family.imbecile
    • No one can control the image others have of them.sr_rosa
    • Look at the upside. Now that everyone believes you are already hitting her you can actually start hitting her.deadsperm
    • Does everyone assume that? And if they do, how fucked up is it that domestic violence is common enough that that's the first thought?Fax_Benson
    • Domestic violence is not that common. People believe it is because women are always complaining and posing as victims.deadsperm
    • If they learned to shut their trap domestic violence would be even less common.deadsperm
    • easy, ask her to punch you in both eyes, at least you can say you had a fight and she wondmay
    • ˄ this.
      ********
    • A kiss with a fist is better than none
      https://youtu.be/SkS…
      Gnash
    • “Oh that? She fell and hit her eye on a door handle. Throw me another beer, toots!”monospaced
    • So many old lowbrow jokes coming back... What's the difference between a woman and a computer? You can punch information into a computer.mg33
    • ^ The darker punchline is "you only have to punch information into a computer once."mg33
    • Why do I feel so much worser typing that out at 42yo than I did in my 20s?mg33
    • Because now it hits home.deadsperm
    • You're what we call a "COVID-beater" in these parts.utopian
    • Just watch. Tomorrow your kid will break their arm riding their new bike. Then both of your loved ones will have visible injuries for all to see.monospaced
    • Damn Mono, you're not too far off on that possibility... My daughter just learned to ride her bike without training wheels YESTERDAY.mg33
    • I know, that's why I was saying it. I'm actually laughing because it could happen waaaaay too easily now :)monospaced
    • @mono you're a witch :)renderedred
    • https://m.youtube.co…drgs
    • "tripped on a rug".BusterBoy

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