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Out of context: Reply #68743
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- nocomply11
It's looking highly likely that my wife is going to leave her job at a university and come work for my business. It's something we've talked about for many years now.
Having both of us try to work our own separate full-time jobs just isn't working.
We have 2 kids (3.75 and 10 months). They're both in full-time preschool/daycare, and it's costing us tons.
My wife has a fairly rigid 9-to-5er. But I run my own business so I'm flexible with my time. As a result, I'm only working about 3/4 time right now because I'm trying to be a part-time stay-at-home dad, and a full-time self-employed business owner.
My wife is no longer happy at her work and it's bringing unneeded stress into the household.
We're maxed out every day. Our careers are competing with each other and causing both of us to basically tread water that's up to our noses instead of working to get ahead in life.
My business has a much higher earning potential than her job, but it doesn't come with the health insurance benefits that we need in the US.
The plan is for us to restructure our lives so that I work more hours. We'd cut day care for the little one and have grandparents or a babysitter watch him 3 days a week so that my wife can help me with project management, client communication, invoicing, admin, etc... all of which she would be amazing at and would save me tons of time.
Our older son would drop down to 3 days a week in preschool as well to save some funds.
We'd have to purchase our own health insurance, which I still need to figure out. Any kind of retirement savings would have to temporarily go on hold.
This change would totally transform our lives. It's kind of the scariest thing I've ever done, but I seriously think it could work. We'd have to live on a super-tight budget to start, but I know it would make everyone in our family much happier. Working together towards a common goal is the life that we want.
If it doesn't work, my wife is open to getting another job somewhere else.
So right now it's looking like we're going to give it a shot.
Wish us luck!
- good luck - sounds like you know what you're doingFax_Benson
- good luck!microkorg
- Good luck, see if you can have grand parents help you for the first part of transition. Cut that daycare to 0 for the first month.eryx
- wait, but free tuition for the kids!Gnash
- Yeah the loss of the free college tuition thing is tough, but her plan was never to be there for the next 14 years anyway.nocomply
- Or she can get another university job in 5-10 years.nocomply
- good luckmugwart
- I did this with an ex. It was great while it was great (~3 years). It wasn't after it wasn't. I'm still struggling because of that decision in so many ways.SteveJobs
- Hope your work and relationship succeed!SteveJobs
- Thanks! Our relationship is strong. We've known each other for over half our lives now. We communicate well. Been together almost 14 years.nocomply
- What's funny is that we never doubted how working together would affect our relationship. For both of us it just felt right.nocomply
- best of luck. you'll never regret giving a go.Gnash
- Good luck! Be sure to treat yo'selves when u can.bezoar
- godspeed, good sir!showpony
- I'm in the same boat. 2 kids in daycare is brutal. My wife and I started driving for Lyft to make extra $$. So far so good. Best of luck to you!brandonp
- good luck! you can do it!SimonFFM
- I don't know you but you sound like you have a plan. And keeping fixed costs like childcare down is a good start. Good look and don't forget: Have fun togetherLongcopylover
- Work ruins everything.robthelad
- Sounds good. Kids will love it. Tight budget is good - makes you waste less, consume less, appreciate more.shapesalad
- We've been doing something similar for the past 8 years or so; 1st son 4 years ago, 2nd 2 months ago.
Personally things are amazing...ideaist - ...Professionally things move between "okay" and "not so great" on a month-to-month basis.ideaist
- I think a strong relationship will be tested (as our was/is), BUT if you're honest, communicate well and are on the same page it can be done.
: )ideaist - Godspeed. best of luck. make it happen.umbee54
- Good plan - My wife quit when she had our first kid. We have a small house, small budget but she does so much with so little with our two kids.stoplying
- Thanks everyone! It's inspiring to hear your words of encouragement. We are totally oscillating between being scared as fuck. Like, "What if we can't do it?"nocomply
- And then total optimism, like "We can't make it work! It's possible. Our lives will be so much better."nocomply
- D'oh... "We CAN make it work" Hope that's not a freudian slip.nocomply
- You sound extremely stressed outcannonball1978