Jokes in poor taste...
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- kingsteven0
What's worse than a cardboard box?
Paper tits
- whatsup0
that's our word... you can't use that word
- sine0
Why are wedding dresses traditionally white?
To match the kitchen appliances...
- georgesIII0
Jeffrey Dahmer was a dry guy.
- GeorgesII0
Go back to suckinh Steve Jobs' dick.
B-but he's dead!
exactly.
- GeorgesII0
Am I the only one posting here,
you guys should share the jokes, instead of hoarding them
- kap0r0
What do orphans get at Christmas?
Lonely.
- hotroddy0
The Iranian Ambassador to the UN had just finished giving a speech and walked out into the lobby of the convention center where he met U.S. General Patraeus.
They shook hands.
As they walked the Iranian said, "You know, I have just one question about what I have seen in America ."
The General said, "Well, anything I can do to help you, I will."
The Iranian whispered, "My son watches this show called Star Trek and in it there is Chekhov who is Russian, Scotty who is Scottish, Uhura
who is black and Sulu who is Japanese, but no Muslims.My son is very upset and doesn't understand why there aren't any Iranians, Iraqis, Afghans, Syrians or Pakistanis on Star Trek."
The General laughed, leaned toward the Iranian ambassador, and whispered back,
"That's because it takes place in the future".
- elahon0
Two tramps were walking along the railroad tracks one day and one tramp said to the other, "I'm the luckiest guy in the world".
"Why is that?" said the other tramp.
"Well, I was walking down these tracks last week and I found a £20. I went into town and bought a case of wine and was drunk for three days."
The other tramp said, "That was pretty good, but I think I'm the luckiest guy in the world. I was walking down these very tracks about two weeks ago, and just up ahead was a gorgeous naked woman tied to the tracks. I untied her and took her up there in the trees and I had sex with her for two days."
"Jesus", said the first tramp. "You are the luckiest guy; did you get a blow job, too?"
"Well", the other tramp said, "No, I never found her head."
- elahon0
Mike and Bob had just finished the first nine holes in their round of golf, and it was obvious that Mike was having an awful day.
"Gee Mike, you're just not your old self today. What's the matter?" asked Bob.
Mike, looking pretty glum, said, "I think Connie's dead."
"My God! That's terrible," said Bob, "but you said you only THINK your wife is dead. Aren't you sure?"
"Well, I just don't know" responded Mike, "the sex is still the same, but the dishes have been piling up all week."
- dasohr0
ever see stevie wonder's wife?
neither has he ...
- panacea0
So there are two guys in their late seventies who are headed out to their deer hunting blinds in the woods. To get to their blinds, they cross a paved road, and walk into the timber about a quarter of a mile. They cross the road, and get on the trail. After a moment or two of walking, one guy turns to the other, and points to the road, saying, "Wow, would you look at that?" The second guy turns to see a very large funeral procession make it's way down the road that they had just crossed. The hearse creeps by slowly and solemly followed by a long line of flagged cars, and the second man slowly removes his hunting cap, he bows his head, and points his rifle toward the ground.
Seeing what his friend has done after noticing the funeral procession, the guy says, "Wow, that sure is respectful, you know. You stand there, and take off your cap, and spend a moment of your hunting time to honor the dead. Wow, that's really something for you to do. I'm impressed." And his friend looks up and says,
"It's the least I can do. I was married to her for 42 years!"
- JOSF0
With your donation of just £2 a month. You can help buy mosquito nets that will stop over 1 million mosquitos from contracting HIV in africa this year.
- CALLES0
every now and then i walk my boss and slap him in the ass saying "Great team Work" and walk away. while he talks to people
but then again he comes in and farts in my room
- cruddlebub0
what do spinach and anal sex have in common?
if you were forced to have it as a child, you'll hate it as an adult.