For the pun of it
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- nearestexit
Two hydrogen atoms meet. One says "I've lost my electron."
The other says "Are you sure?"
The first replies "Yes, I'm positive."
- k0na_an0k0
*horn
wah wahhh
- gramme0
my cymbals are broken, I can't even make the sound
*kicks drum set
- flavorful0
I put the P-U in pun.
- flavorful0
I also put the F-U in fun.
- nearestexit0
A vulture boards an airplane, carrying two dead raccoons. The stewardess looks at him and says, "I'm sorry, sir, only one carrion allowed per passenger."
- nocomply0
haha you guys are so punny!
- nearestexit0
Two fish swim into a concrete wall. The one turns to the other and says "Dam!"
- kinetic0
you'll all be going to the punitentiary for those
- JerseyRaindog0
why did the chicken cross the playground?
To get to the other slide.
- nearestexit0
A group of chess enthusiasts checked into a hotel and were standing in the lobby discussing their recent tournament victories. After about an hour,
the manager came out of the office and asked them to disperse."But why?", they asked, as they moved off.
"Because," he said," I can't stand chess-nuts boasting in an open foyer."
- Liam_J0
What do you call an arrogant insect?
A cocky-roach!
- TheBlueOne0
As Reynoldo lit the votive candle at the grotto for San Jose de los Platanos, and prayed for the healthy delivery of his first child, he heard a disembodied voice say, "Your daughter will be born 17 inches long,"
To which Reynoldo replied, "Do you know the weight, too, San Jose?
- elahon0
Mahatma Gandhi, as you know, walked barefoot most of the time, which produced an impressive set of calluses on his feet. He also ate very little, which made him rather frail, and, with his odd diet, he suffered from bad breath. This made him ....
A super callused fragile mystic hexed by halitosis.
- jox0
Hahhahaa, all of those are great ^^^
- nearestexit0
A woman has twins and gives them up for adoption. One of them goes to a
family in Egypt and is named "Ahmal." The other goes to a family in Spain;
they name him "Juan." Years later, Juan sends a picture of himself to his
birth mother. Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wishes she also had a picture of Ahmal.Her husband responds, "They're twins! If you've seen Juan, you've seen Ahmal."