Crit Me (II)
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- 13 Responses
- tenpointtwo
Second round of abuse. Give me your worst
- kyl30
that guy probably get 'stuff' done but not 'shit'. maybe a more active or hip lookiing person. and the pink? Not sure about that in the main image. looking better though
- RoyBoy0
More corporate. Stay true to the demographic.
:)
- jevad0
MUCH better! about 100x!
LOL @ 'we gets shit done'...I take it thats not what you showed the client?
The images are again a bit dull and unillustrative...have you hit getty or stone up?
I'd still like to see a little more made of the menu, something maybe like this:
http://www.tarkentonfinancial.co…
On teh right track though...
- jevad0
that html text is nasty by the way
give it line spacing of 16 or 17px and stick to verdana 10/11px, or maybe tahoma...
- ArtDirector0
nice improvement
- forcetwelve0
yeah that web text is yuk.
as jevad said - tahoma 11pt or something, and give it some air.pink and grey - that's been done.
i'd never put any kind of obscenity on a site no matter what?
"we get it done" ???
- photovoltaic0
- This is an improvement on the first round, however:
a. consider what you really want the site to say in terms of applying a company standard. although this might be a small company, they might not want to imply that. so far the site definitely reads 'small upstart company'. Also, is this site cohesive with all other applications, ie printed collateral? it really should be inclusive to a standing cohesive package.
b. there are too many rounded edges being applied. i think it should be applied to a box that should stand out, maybe in the area which houses the logo, and no where else.
c. Reconsider your colors. Blue and pink will work in a Ralph Lauren ad, but the colors don't represent a commercial/corporate entity. I don't mean it has to be blue and yellow or blue and grey, either.
d. The use of photography lacks. Though this is just presumably a trial effort, consider using photography you would actually use, depth and again, in line with the company profile.
e. The typography needs refining. It would be good if you received an outline of what is to be on the site, allowing you to gain some sort of hierarchy. this will allow you to decide on an appropriate typeface and size.
Hope this helps.
- davi-t0
Looks better.
No-go on the pink.
Body copy should be to the right instead of the left. Move the old dood to the right.
Make the guy appear outside of the boundaries..maybe his feet are outside of the gray bounds. give it some life.
Kill rounded edges. Make em sharp. This is corporate.
That aliased font looks like shat.
Paper airplane and gradient don't work.
Colors are kinda weird. think corporate.
Make a grid and follow that. shits all over the place.
- spendogg0
the pink makes me think of Pepto.
- Sven_sk0
i don't like the old guy on the home page. i thinks he's kinda creepy.
- tenpointtwo0
thanks for the feedback. Yeah, I didnt show the client this iteration. so I'm guessing the pink isn't working? I was trying to push it away from typical corporate, but I dont want it to get into the realm of immaturity.
thanks again
- uhohseangettio0
It looks mirked too me
- Bill_Perkins0
FIX THE MASTHEAD
The blue is nice, but throw some sort of gradient over it, fade it one way or another, make it do something that feels dynamic. Add a little texture too.