fidelity
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- jblue0
Actually, I'm caught in the middle. I am friends with both. Although he doesn't know I know. I'd hate to see them split but she feels like a sucker. Can't help wondering if she's setting herself up.
- dippy0
It sucks. She sounds like she needs assurance that he'll never do it again. If he's not giving that to her at the very least, then something's wrong...
- Jnr_Madison0
3 months before, fuck, I'd drop kick them into touch.
- lifeinsodium0
there are no gaurantees about how one will act in the future.
although he might have been trying to do the right thing by being honest about this whole thing, he's put his wife in an awkward position because now she will continue to doubt him.
and her reaction is expected so surely he knew what he was getting himself into when he admitted to all those things. call me a crazy optimist but i see that as a positive sign. and that's what the wife should try to look at.
- dippy0
what lifeinsodium said.
although the husband has a responsibility as well. it doesn't just end with you saying you're sorry. you gotta walk the walk
- jblue0
Lifeinsodium, I hope you're a male. It gives me hope.
I remember reading an article once that said that around 50% of men will cheat on their wives/partners at some point. Don't know the numbers for repeat offences. But it was a shock to think that you only have a 50-50 chance of having a monogamous relationship.
- jevad0
"The first affair was after 3 years together (2 years before wedding) long before proposal. The attempted affair was 3 months before they got married"
and she still married him?!
Foolish
- jblue0
Jevad: have you never loved someone that much that you could give them another chance?
- -leah-0
he is SO going to cheat on her. there is a 95% chance he won't cheat again
- Jaline0
Yeah, I think he will cheat on her again.
- _salisae_0
you can't live in fear .. if he claims that it will never happen again she's gotta let it go
give her strength - not more paranoia
if there is ever evidence of it happening again - then it is an issue
- dippy0
and she still married him?!
Foolish
jevad
(Jan 23 05, 20:37)jevad, in her situation, being told of unfaithfulness 24 hrs before the wedding, that's just hard. I can understand why she went ahead with it anyway. doesn't make it okay, just saying it's a difficult situation.
- jevad0
"Jevad: have you never loved someone that much that you could give them another chance?"
The foundation of any healthy relationship is trust.
Once that is gone, there is NO way imho that the relationship will work.
Be assurfed - he will do it again, and she may say he trusts him...but she will always doubt, and she will never trust him 100% again.
She was a fool to marry him.
I have been on the recieving end.
- lifeinsodium0
oh come on! stop assuming he'll do it again. maybe he wont? maybe his wife will read these comments and divorce him and then he'll go kill himself?
i am not in a position to say if he'll do it again or if he won't because i don't know the guy. neither do most of us here. but the fact that he tried not to get away with it says something (good) about his character. and him trying to get with the other woman says something (bad) about him. so the score is 1-1 here.
jblue, your getting hope gives me hope. does that make sense? no? oh well...
- -leah-0
jevad i agree with you 100% and i too have been on the receiving end
- jblue0
I suppose their situation is unique. She once cheated on her previous partner and she regretted it. And she's vowed to never do it again. And hasn't. But guys are a different animal.
- jevad0
"oh come on! stop assuming he'll do it again. maybe he wont?"
he will
- -leah-0
But guys are a different animal.
jblue(Jan 23 05, 20:48)
b.s. it has nothing to do with man or woman.
- dippy0
agreed, leah.
- jblue0
I meant they don't see the infidelity the same way. That's a generalisation I know, but generally women cheat because they feel ignored and men cheat because they... well, I don't know why they do it. I was going to say because they want more sex than they are probably getting. But I know I'm going to get shot for that.