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Out of context: Reply #76791
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- Ianbolton21
I've spent the last year or so struggling so much with addiction and today I just feel bored and finally seem happy with that feeling. Like, I'm happy to sit and do nothing. At peace with myself.
- Cheer up Ian! <3OBBTKN
- just sitting and being happy with yourself is a challenge in our modern times!Chimp
- Keep up the good work - I'm rooting for you!stoplying
- Husband is coming up on 1200 days sober. Still dealing with it, but dealing with it.i_monk
- Good luck Ian, steady as you goGardener
- Currently doing a detox as well. Boredom is the WORST lol. I'm looking forward to being happy with boredom. Hang in there Ianny.garbage
- when I am in a crisis the idea of boredom feels like a luxury, and i remember that every time I'm feeling bored or dejected. Well done for recognizing it.DaveO
- Health is wealth; been their brother!!!
X
Oideaist - 1.5 years without a drop of alcohol. Longest steak since I was a teenager!fooler
- You got this.Longcopylover
- Input or substance?Nairn
- I suffer both.Nairn
- Sorry, I shouldnt've asked.Nairn
- Correction, 2000 days.i_monk
- Nairn, substance. Primarily weed and alcohol. And it's okay to ask. I need to be open about it, as hiding it has been my issueIanbolton
- Nothing to be ashamed of. I'm technically not an alcoholic, but anybody can develop an SUD. I don't have the gene where I can't stop, but..garbage
- ..I have insanely high tolerances. Several years back I was drinking a handle a day. I don't get hangovers, I never feel or seem drunk when I drink.garbage
- So when I quit, my body woke me up with a seizure and a hospital trip where I got full DTs and attacked the ER staff. (fun stuff, I know)garbage
- That was years ago, and since then I've been a responsible drinker with no issues.. until some close friends passed, and I realized I was drinking as a crutch..garbage
- ..the past couple months. Plan on being fully dry by the 3rd. Corny, but if you need a shoulder give me a shout. We got this.garbage
- I getcha Garb. That's mad how you ended up in hospital having a seizure. Is that the first time when you realised you had a problem?Ianbolton
- Mine started in Lockdown with coke. I isolated myself so much that i was using drink and drugs to be happy in my own company.Ianbolton
- And since then, being alone felt like i was sooooooo alone. And i needed to get out my head. I took antidepressants to ease some of the anxietyIanbolton
- But instead of doing that, it made me not care about anything. Existential dread kicked in and i ended up in hospital last November as i wanted to end it allIanbolton
- I don't have a problem with alcohol; I have a problem with me. I forget what the doctors told me, but I have some weird gene polymorphism that leads to..garbage
- ..easy processing. I'm still totally functional, don't really have cravings or anything. But the time I was really not paying attention..garbage
- (lost a friend, general malaise) and just thought I could taper down, got bored with the tapering process and quit cold turkey.garbage
- Collapsed on the floor, then went full DT to the point where I was in 4 point restraints. Fucking embarassing.garbage
- But honestly my bigger problem was just not caring. I can mentally quit any time, but I caught myself slipping in the past few months..garbage
- ..then quitting for a few years. Coke though.. had a brief fling with coke and immediately realized that might be a problem and quit.garbage
- (Last bit was supposed to be "dialing it back in the next week, then quitting for a few years.")garbage
- But offer still stands if you need to reach out, I'm an ear.garbage