blog
Out of context: Reply #73399
- Started
- Last post
- 76,751 Responses
- garbage3
Incoming combo meal of blood:
So I'm a shit talker, especially to my dogs. The bulldog is incredibly frustrating at times, the running throwaway line over the years is for crimes like breaking into the trash can is "fuck you, hope you get butt cancer".
Welp, Molly got butt cancer. She had surgery 2 weeks ago, which was followed by 10 days of a leaky tap of black assblood, slowly turning red. It looked so much like oil that I rewatched "There Will Be Blood".
I'm an antinatalist. Props to you parents out there, because I have no idea how you do it.
I changed so many bloody diapers, was on call to walk her every few hours because the vet said her shit would just "slip out", we got a babygate to seal her off in the kitchen to save the rugs, constant policing on butt-scrubbing because there was a risk of her breaking her stitches and having to go back to square one. I had to thieve my sleep in 3-4 hour incriments.
She's finally out of the diapers, things are coming back to normal. Then her pathology reports come in, and it turns out they missed the fucking margins. Chemo is suggested. Fuck.
Blood Story Chapter 2:
I'm taking a staycation while the missus is house-sitting at her brother's place. He's got a lot of chickens and turtles.
Sunday morning I wake up and there is blood fucking everywhere. Sheets, pillow, everything covered in cold wet blood. Immediately assume Molly got out of her crate and cuddled next to me in the night.
Nope, locked in her crate. Ran to a mirror and checked for a nosebleed. Nothing. Checked Leo Moneydog. Nothing. There's just blood everywhere.
Welcome to a comedy of errors.
The night before I was watching the UFC PPV. When fights are boring I tend to half-watch, work on my tumbles, get a good workout in.
It appears that the robot vacuum robot found some bits of broken wine glass and dropped them on the living room rug en route to self-clean. I sliced my tricep open, didn't feel it, Izzy won, quick shower, went to bed, and rolled around with a glass splinter in the back of my arm all night, and had a rude awakening like the guy from The Godfather, except in my head I was thinking it was bulldog assblood.
That's all. Bonus Molly and out.
- She’s a cutie, hope she recovers soon!scarabin
- How did you not notice you had a shard of glass in your arm?drgs
- It was like a glass splinter. Tiny shard of one of those delicate wine glasses. It didn't start doing damage until I was rolling around in my sleep.garbage
- Cut me up from the inside, painted my bed with my bad sleep habits.garbage
- Thanks, IKEAscarabin
- https://www.youtube.…drgs
- lol, it was actually some fancy crystal stemless glass that is paper thin. And yes on the Rambo. Once I finally found the wound it was superglue and bandage.garbage
- @garbage please hug her for me, and send my best wishes and faith in that this huge fucken parabola won't be the part of her life for long.********
- I cut an artery on my left ankle while i was trying with deal with an itch with my right leg. wasn't noticing it until I felt like i'm standing in oil. no pain********
- it was some super thin brandy glass, what broke on the previous night********
- Same situation for me, just a wild thing to wake up to. Will give Molly a spirit squeeze for ya.garbage
- Damn. Hope everyone turns out okay. Nothing at all like kids btw.monospaced
- You're right, dogs occasionally have redeeming qualities, https://www.youtube.…garbage
- I think it was more about using that plural :D********


