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Out of context: Reply #69881

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  • fadein1122

    Okay, I rarely post anything personal on here anymore. Probably my own fault for being such a bell-end in the past. But hey ho, I'm not one to dwell on the past.

    Anyway, I set myself a new challenge this year. Something I have had inside me since childhood / early teens.

    I grew up loving film more than anything (even more than art which came close second). Film was massive in my house growing up. I watched 100’s of films. My dad sold furniture most of his life and did a deal on a sofa with the local video shop owner - unlimited rentals for us. I was like a sponge. There were little restrictions on what I could watch either. Roeg's Don't Look Now as a youngish child has stuck with me my entire life, what were my parents thinking ha? But I am grateful, it's a masterpiece as were a lot of the other films I watched growing up.

    And a big chunk of my youth was spent making films on a camcorder. Editing them with the camera and one VHS player. They weren't very good but I loved it and had the bug.

    I always hoped I would be either an artist or a filmmaker. The former seemed more achievable back then.

    I went to art school, then studied fine art at university, loved it, but there was always that nagging filmmaker inside me so I ended up doing a lot of video work on my degree. Quite odd video installations. I also loved painting but always felt it was a little pointless as 'the means of production' were changing so fast (digital media was really taking off at this time) so I started using video as a 'painterly' medium. I created long videos of abstract morphing forms. Basically digital paintings that slowly changed over hours. Barely noticeable unless you sat there for a long time. I was happy with those.

    I got my degree but then fell into graphic/web design because I had spent most of my Fine Art degree using the new digital tools available. I never felt comfortable as a designer, I still don't. I was never trained in graphic design. But it has been my main source of income for the last 20+ years. Career wise, I'm a jack of all trades, master of none if I am honest.

    I have always carried on with my art on the side, some years more productive than others. I did a solo show many years back which went well. But I kind of chickened out of that dream as I always liked having money, never a lot but enough to get by. Chasing the art dream would have meant a lot of sacrifices, I think I still regret that decision now.

    Anyway, the reason I am posting. I set myself a task this year - to finally complete a film script. I have tried many times and failed many times. None of my ideas really hooked me to the point where I could sit day after day and complete them. The last couple of years I had an idea that did stick. I spent at least a year building it inside my head. It grew and grew. Characters came to life. The plot became real. I thought to myself I need to do this now. I'm in my 40's, time isn't on my side. Especially to change direction with 2 children to support. But I thought I would give it a go and glad I did.

    I'm happy to say I am 75% through the project. I am really pleased with it so far. It kind of spilled out of me. I'm sure working on these things becomes easier in your 40's. Way more life experience. Pretentiousness is low. Your inner voice is clearer. Screenwriting suits me as well, it's v.functional writing. It's about telling a story in a concise way.

    So the point of this post? I just think your 40's are a great time to achieve lifelong goals if you can make the time (i.e. many late nights). A few years ago I decided to achieve some music goals also (something I have also done pretty much my whole life). That went well but I know deep down there are many others better who have probably devoted more of their lives to it and are more deserving.

    I haven't completed the project yet but I know I will. And will anything come of it? I hope so, it's definitely a product of the times (in an unexpected way) but I will also be happy if it doesn't. Just doing/completing something I have always wanted to try will be enough.

    It would take balls of steel to share it on here when complete, not sure I could but who knows.

    Sorry for the length of this post but I thought I would share my thoughts as I would love to hear any other members' experiences of screenwriting if you have any? Or of achieving major goals in your 40's.

    Thanks.

    p.s. What thread to put this in? midlife crisis or blog... either really but blog will do :)

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    • tl/dr - chase your dreams, it's never too late.fadein11
    • hey if you ever want someone to read it or bounce off, yell out.inteliboy
    • nice one, that would be cool.fadein11
    • "not one to dwell on the past" then writes a ridic long post on my past, I'm still and likely will always be a bell-end :)fadein11
    • Stay hungry. Your soul is in tact.DRIFTMONKEY
    • Good luck with this, I can relate to how you got there, and I'm doing my own explorations of what I can do post-advertising.Continuity
    • You are not starting from scratch,you are connecting the dots backwards, something you have been preparing all your life https://youtu.be/D1R…drgs
    • Like, 40-what?Khurram
    • 45fadein11
    • That's reassuring. Nice one. Thanks for this.Khurram
    • @drgs, yep exactlyfadein11
    • Wow awesome. Love storytelling, made my first stop motion film at 7, made films off and on since then. You're not late in life your on time.robotron3k
    • I've got a script I've been sitting on for 4 years, still needs work but complete. I'm intrigued your script is "a product of the times" I would also love to rerobotron3k
    • Read if you'd like more eyes on it. A friend gave me footage of a doc they want salvaged. It's a project about a cotton-picking Vietnam war hero, I may dorobotron3k
    • If we can get things in order. I would say working in film as an adult is the ultimate playtime ever invented. Keep on!robotron3k
    • I read your recent post on your interest in filmmaking. if only off site communication was easier :)fadein11
    • re: "product of the times" - of course everything is but I think this story tells Britains (or Englands) current situation in an interesting way.fadein11
    • And nope it's not an autopilot liberal narrative. That's exactly what I didn't want to do. One of the main characters is the exact opposite of that.fadein11
    • I'd be lying if I said this place hasn't been an important influence.fadein11
    • I am making it sound like a political story, it's not really but it is the backdrop. Anyway... thanks for the comments. Took me hours to decide whether tofadein11
    • post or not...fadein11
    • great post, fade. Get it done.Fax_Benson
    • Cheers fax, you know I love you :)fadein11
    • been waiting all my life for someone to have the balls to capture and portray the beauty and complexity of thursday night cottaging behind the lidl, staffordPeterPancake
    • thank u, fadein :)PeterPancake
    • Great post fadein...and Fuck Adobe!utopian
    • Awesome post, really hope you share here when complete. Hugely inspired / moved by your story!mantrakid
    • Deadly man - sounds really exciting - well donepedromendez
    • Super cool! Hope to see it when you're finished.bezoar
    • Tell us when it hits the screen. I'll pay to watch, I promise.Longcopylover
    • Firstly, congrats on finding the spare time to do this between the day job and being a father to two kids! ;)microkorg
    • It involved a lot of late nights. And I would be finished by now if I had enough time! Really busy with day job right now so it's on hold for time being.fadein11
    • Thanks for all the positive comments.fadein11
    • Best advice i’ve received From getting into that is just think of a script as 3-5 pages at a time. Easier that way.antimotion
    • Also, I highly recommend spike lee and Mira Nair’s masterclass. Lee’s is really down to earth brass tacks and hers is more sophisticated, but so inspirational!antimotion
    • Yep - totally agree on treating it as small chunks. It's pretty daunting at the start. Mapping it out for a long time helped as well. Thanks for the tips. Willfadein11
    • check out those talks also.fadein11
    • I like QBN for posts like this one! I encourage you Fadein to continue.Bennn
    • Haven't watched those Masterclasses but did have a sub for a year on that site. Some great classes! Worth it esp if u can get a deal!microkorg
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