IKEA Accident
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- CALLES
I hate Stores.. i mean i hate them... i get itchy, annoyed, pissed off. So my girlfriend is moving... which means that i'm the one doing most of the moving... Anyways so we go to IKEA... Holy Shit... Kill me now. Anyways i got lost like 3 times and when we go to the lower level to the "Self Service" whatever.
Wait beofre that... me and my friends decided to wear yellow in case we get lost... mind you non of off have been there so we didn't know every worker uses yellow also... we lost each other in 10 minutes
Anyways.. we get this shelf thing and we have a little cart... Those things are fast... but as we are picking it up my friends text me that they are about to pay... so my girlfriend is pushing the cart and i get in a hurry and i start pulling it
She: Dont pull it
Me: Now we gotta go... they are about to pay and i want to get out of here...i keep talking next thing i know
She: Alfredo.... Alfredo!!!
She: ALFREDO!!! ALFREDO NOOO!!!when i realize whats going on i see the cart zipping past me since i am pulling it from the front the part where you push it is the front part now.... so i try to stop it with both my hand and since the wood is heavy it's actually pulling me and its dragging me with it..
Since she has been screaming my name for 20 something seconds everyone has stopped and they are looking at my every single move. there is a circle around me and finally i was able to slow down the thing but not before a plank of wood smacking an old lady right on the side of her head!
Stranger Girl Behind My Girlfriend: Oh No ALFREDO:
20 something stranger chuckling away
i will never go back
- Amicus0
hehe...
nice way to waste 2 minutes of my morning...
- tasty0
Wear matching shirts as to not get lost
...is this a youth group you call friends?
- CALLES0
no... more like stoners
- johndiggity0
ikea outings are no joke. you have to treat it like a surgical military strike. get in, get to the target, get out. stay too long and they will have you eating meatballs and saying hej!
- d_rek0
Pics or it didn't happen.
- Amicus0
I think he got the military strike part... just the wrong target.
- CALLES0
from the 55 second
- harlequino0
Good title for this story:
"Recipe for IKEA Alfredo"
- CALLES0
oh yeah.. i forget to say tha my girlfriend let it go cuz i was pulling... those thing can run fast!
- CALLES0
story of my life... it was a sunday and me trying to do what "normal people" do... i was trying to "join society"
- JackRyan0
You got to give and take, I mean how many of your IKEA visits ended in one of the bedroom displays like, "ALFREDO!!!...YES!!!...OH ALFREDO...YESSSSSSS!!!"
- waterhouse0
+1 on getting high before going to IKEA
- VectorMasked0
is there something wrong with me...???
Last time I went to Ikea... about 2 yrs ago with my ex-gf, I felt like I was in Disneyland. Couldn't leave and didn't want to leave and wanted to buy tons of shit.
Do I need help?
- its a trap for adultsCALLES
- and it made you want to have a baby too?waterhouse
- YES! Yes it did!! I almost got it ON! with my gf right fucking there and planned to make pancakes in their kitchens!!!VectorMasked
- Jesus christ! they are the devil!
I now see the light brothers!!!VectorMasked
- designbot0
I'm with you. Every time I would go into that place I would get pissed off. There is always way too many people in there...you can't even stop to look at something without stopping the constant line of people flooding through it.
And the worst part of all is putting the stuff from IKEA together. My wife and I bought this 2-drawer little bedside table thing and there was like 200 pieces! Took forever to put together.
What happened to the old lady?
- I love putting that kind of shit together!! screws here and there! oh yes... it just is fun for me.VectorMasked
- she is fineCALLES
- boobs0
Whenever I go to Home Depot, or Lowe's, I'm always worried those fuckers are going to drop a load of planks on me.
IKEA is a terrible firetrap. They must have paid millions in bribes to have such a huge place with no exits.
- harlequino0
If you were wearing yellow, like the IKEA employees, you could have said, "OMG, lady! I'm so sorry, I'll get my manager!" and then slip out in the comotion.
- OnesandZeros0
ohh man... I went to that IKEA last time I was in town. What a fucking mad house. You know... IKEA... kinda cool, nice, cheap stuff, but I am not impressed by their stores whatsoever. They are overly confusing and panic inducing. The food also blows.
- haha! you don't like the $1 breakfast :)designbot
- they should just give it awayOnesandZeros
- CALLES0
it was very confusing.... i tried to escape the madness and outsmart the store just to end up in the same place and the prices looking cheaper