Friday Jokes
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- gramme
I'll start.
—frankpa, our very own Chinese entrepreneur, goes to get an eye exam. After the exam, the doctor says "frankpa, I'm sorry to say this, but it seems you have cataracts." Frankpa says, "What?! I no have Cadirac. I have Rincoln TownCar."
- iCanHasQBN0
What did the ocean say to the beach?
Nothing, it just waved.
- gramme0
A female gorilla at the zoo is in serious heat. She can't get enough sex. Zookeepers keep sending male gorillas to her, and her appetite isn't being curbed. She's going crazy, starting to act violent, and is scaring visitors. Management are getting desperate.
Word reaches their ears that a certain zookeeper has quite a way with the ladies. The zookeeper's boss approaches him and offers $500 to sleep with the crazed gorilla. The zookeeper says, "Hmm. I'm not sure. Can I have a day to think about it?" His boss says, "Sure, take your time."
The zookeeper comes back to his boss the next day, and says, "I'll do it, but only if three conditions are met: (1) I'll need a case of beer. (2) the gorilla will have to wear a Dale Earnhardt jersey. And (3) I'll need a week to come up with the $500."
- thanks for resurrecting the thread.iCanHasQBN
- hahascarabin
- ross0
What do you get if you put a turtle in a blender?
An errection.
- gramme0
I am underwhelmed by your performance here, people. It's Friday. Make with the funnies.
- e-wo0
Why did God create only one Yogi Bear?
- nb0
What do you call an empty bottle of Cheez Whiz?
- chalk0
The actual joke of the day thread is much funnier.
- dasohr0
two cannibals eating a clown.
says one to the other: "this taste funny to you?"
- iCanHasQBN0
What did one tampon say to the other tampon?