OJ Done Did It
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- TheBlueOne
..again...maybe...allegedly..
- Point50
Great publicity for Palace Station; that place is like the armpit of bigger named casinos out here.
- ********0
did cnn get a facelift? they changed the font , didnt they??
- k0na_an0k0
this just in.
very slow police chase down the strip. police chasing what appears to be a white... kia?!? oh oj... how far you've fallen.
- blaw0
it would be so funny if he got nailed for something like this and actually had to do time.
- CALLES0
I know... Orange Juice makes me wanna go to the bathroom tooo
- ********0
- ********0
"dull story..
but.. oh hallelujah"
how is that story any different than any other breakup? she fell for his BS
- ********0
now shes mad
- ********0
haha, guess thats true
- ********0
U.S To Pull Out Of Iraq
U.S. to Pull Out of Iraq, Come All Over It
BAGHDAD -- After more than two years of fucking the shit out of Iraq, the United States military is finally ready to pull out, and come all over the broken and exhausted nation.
"When we first saw Iraq, she was all oiled up, just laying there all helpless and vulnerable. I mean, she was practically begging to be fucked", said President George W. Bush as he gazed longingly at a map of Iran, adding, "Damn, she's hot. It's like twins or something!"
When the United States first inserted itself into Iraq, they stated the clear objective of finding Iraq's Weapons of Mass Destruction, which might have made the sexual act beneficial for both parties. But no matter how hard the US tried, or how many positions they did it in, they simply could not locate the Weapons of Mass Destruction and bring Iraq to a climax.
"This is without a doubt the worst sex we've ever had," said one Iraqi, "even worse than when Saddam fucked us. At least he'd apologize afterwards, buy some flowers and tell us he loved us."
A few months into the sex, people began speculating that the United States was too heavily intoxicated on hubris and greed to be able to perform adequately.
"Clearly they have no idea what they're doing," said Saddam Hussein.
Reports another Iraqi civilian: "They were pretty rough from the beginning, biting and pinching even our most innocent spots. But things got really weird when the United States started tying us up. They just wanted to do all this sick, freaky shit. I mean, you saw Abu Ghirab. We're used to having it a little rough, but we're not freaking masochists, for Allah's sake!"
Despite insistent claims of affection for Iraq, the United States started looking more and more like a rapist to many of the people observing the filmed broadcasts of the copulation.
"They can say whatever they want about human rights," said a French official, "but we can all see that the Americans are just using Iraq. They could have at least gotten permission to fuck her, like they did with Bosnia."
U.S. Officials report that the reason for finally wrapping up this marathon sex act is that we're running low on Viagra.
"We've got military recruiters all over the place, asking parents to send us more of their kids," said Donald Rumsfeld, "I guess no one wants to party anymore."
Now that the U.S. is finally ready to blow their load all over Iraq, certain American citizens have expressed concern about the military's recovery time.
"I just hope they can get it up again soon," said one Senator, "because it looks like all this sex in Iraq has sure gotten Al-Qaeda horny."
-Associated Press
- TheBlueOne0
Do you think his business cards read "Polygamist Prophet"?
- ********0
- Jaline0
This is what I think is going on:
- After murdering the two, he initially denied it so much to himself that he eventually believed he didn't have anything to do with the murders. This would've been effective to get past lie-detector test and to feel better about himself.
- Lately his conscience has been getting to him, resulting in him doing various things (either consciously or subconsciously) to allow himself to get caught.
- 4040
I disagree Jaline, OJ is a loser and he cant stop himself from doing stupid things. Hence mudering 2 people and robbing others at gunpoint.
- TheBlueOne0
"Now I address the court, let's have Mr. Simpson try on some of this alleged sports paraphanalia...go ahead OJ, try it on..."
*Simpson struggles into jersey too sizes too small
"Now if the court will look to this 'autographed' poster of my client..see here, this 'image' of Mr. Simpson is only three feet tall..now look at my client here, look at this healthy specimen of a upstanding man...is he three feet tall? Mmmm-hmmm...I don't believe so...
Now members of the Jury I ask you to listen to this tape..."
"You give me back my stuff, motherfucker..."
Now I ask, does this man seated here, who allegedly had 'acquired Mr. Simpsons 'memorabilia' does he look like someone that might, under different and varied circumstances 'fuck' someone who is a mother? I would asy probably...and finally, here in this corner is Chewbacca....
So, we have Chewbacca, a mother fucker, a tiny un;life like Simpson and a jersey that just won't fit...it is clear you must acquit...nothing further."