clients vs. designers
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- keshuyu
this is too funny.
--------------------------------...
"I cant' read the type"[10 point Universe]
"I still cant' read the type. Our audience is 40-50 year olds"
[12 point Universe]
"That's better, could you bump it up one more time"
[14 point Universe]
"Perfect......why is the logo so small?"
--------------------------------...
Them:
"I want the images to be in .wav-format. Our secretary's brother says that's
the best format for websites."Me:
"That's audio format, not for images."Them:
"Could you please try, I want to see how it looks."--------------------------------...
"not too ghetto, not too fancy, do you get it? and i want a diamond in the
middle, but like a unique one, a diamond no body has seen before, can you
pull that off?"--------------------------------...
Boss:
"k, can you develop some comps for us?"Me:
"sure, what type of site is it?"Boss:
"we don't know yet."Me:
"okk...do you have any content i can look at to get an idea?"Boss:
"no not yet, just make it look professional"--------------------------------...
Me:
"i hear you have some comments on the proposal."Client:
"yes, the website...i can't believe it will take that long (cost so much),
surely you can just copy and paste the design from our brochure into a web
window?!"Me:
"its a little more complicated than that i'm afraid."Client:
"my son has a website."--------------------------------...
"i don't want 'Microsoft Internet Explorer' at the top of the window, you
have to get rid of it?"--------------------------------...
Me:
"Ok, if you could draw up a rough outline of what you want on the site
(sections, maybe some rough copy, etc) and I'll start getting some ideas
together."Client:
"Sure, great! This is going to be great!"(three weeks pass)
Client:
"How's the site coming along?"Me:
"Well, I haven't received anything from you yet. All I know is that you want
a website, but you have given me no idea as to what you want in it or what
you might want it to look like."Client:
"Ok, yeah, I'll get on that right now and send it ASAP."(two weeks later and still nothing)
Client:
"How's the site coming along?"Me:
"Great, almost finished!"--------------------------------...
(on what to name client's company):
"I don't know, whatever you decide"--------------------------------...
"At one point I controlled the entire atlantic fleet of nuclear subs. Do you
know what kind of pressure that is? ....and you think being up 81 hours give
YOU the right to be stressed?"--------------------------------...
AND FINALLY BUT NOT LEAST...
"Can we make the logo morph into a Unicorn and dance away?"
--------------------------------...
- AD0
nice post - funny stuff
but seriously whats so wrong with a logo morphing into a dancing unicorn - I mean its not too ghetto and not too classy - put a dimond on the unicorn and it would be perfect
- k0na_an0k0
no shit i JUST heard another one to add to the list...
Me: So what do you think of the jpg concepts I posted on the web?
C: They take too long to load and why did you give me 3 home pages in different color?
Me: They are just concepts of your home page like I said last week. I designed 3 different concepts so you could choose one that suits you the best and we could go from there.
C: YOU MEAN MY SITE ISN'T LIVE YET?!? I'VE BEEN SENDING OUT EMAILS INSTRUCTING PEOPLE TO GO THERE ALL WEEK!
Me: *Trying not to laugh. Well, if you choose one of the home page designs I can then start building your site according to the timeline stated before of 1 week.
C: BULLSH*T! You're telling me it's going to take you a f*cking week!?! Isn't there just a button or program on your computer that will turn it into a website and have it work in the next 5 minutes? I just told a friend to go to the site.
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No shit. That just happened 5 minutes ago. I am stunned.
- Bio0
sounds like a winner k0na.
so when ARE you gonna have my site ready, bitch?
hahahah.
- k0na_an0k0
AAAHAHAHAHAHA!
- Gorbie0
Jesus christ.
Those are some of the worst things I've ever heard.
Horrible.
All of them.
Horrible.
- BonSeff0
thats hillarious Kona
the mysterious interweb..here's one from me to client:
"hey man, where's that fucking check you mailed last week?"client:
____radio silence_____
- mrdobolina0
Seff, send sal and rocco over to the clients office.
- BonSeff0
i heard they went witness protection, fuckers
- ********0
funny cus its true good stuff kesh... let me add
c: so can we have out logo in 3d spinning on the corner
me: sure i just need a file of the original logo art work
c: uh...its on the broshure(gets a broshure) here it is
**Broshure has a picture of there door sign with a logo
- mrdobolina0
nah I think they are back in prison, they were running meth with sammy the bull in AZ.
- BonSeff0
and that chick with meth-hair right?
- mrdobolina0
she was the queen bee of the operation.
- unformatted0
haha, mine made the top 10 comments! woo woo!
- robert0
First off the client is paying so you should give them what they want.
If you goto McDonalds and order a cheeseburger they wont give you a hot dog because they think it looks better!
Try to think inside the box while working for corporate clients and you will go further.
OR
You can pick and choose your clients so you only work with people that share your vision. GOOD LUCK in doing that!
- mrdobolina0
in that same respect robert, you dont tell a plumber how to fix your sink.
- ********0
but u tell him that crack kills
- taragee0
LOL
- robert0
True but that is a tad bit different then buying a product.
Paying for a service is one thing... If your paying for a database you don't give a fuck what tools the DBA (plumber) uses.
But if a CEO is buying a newly designed website (marble counter tops, w/ chrome faucets) you better believe he will get everyone in his family to crit your work!
- taragee0
robert is an undercover suit!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
haha
how is it not paying for a service???
- mrdobolina0
but if the family's opinion is shit, you have a right to be disappointed.