ban gay marriage

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    BY RON GROSSMAN

    Chicago Tribune

    CHICAGO - (KRT) - When President Bush last week
    pronounced marriage "the most fundamental
    institution of civilization," he was in good company -
    at least rhetorically. That link has been proclaimed
    every time marriage has gone through changes, as it
    has frequently done throughout history.

    The Roman statesman Cicero held that "the primary bond
    of society is marriage," suggesting an immutable
    institution. In fact, it has always been shaped by
    social currents, sometimes progressive, but often not.

    Through the ages, the institution of marriage has been
    unfair to women, has banned the union of people of
    different races or religions, and has typically been
    far more concerned with property rights than romantic
    love - a very modern notion.

    Now, as gay marriage has ballooned into a major issue
    of the presidential campaign, historians and voters
    alike are reflecting on an institution that truly is a
    foundation stone of society - for better and for
    worse.

    "Since the 19th century, people have treated family
    and marriage as the litmus test of society," said
    Michael Grossberg, an Indiana University professor who
    submitted a friend-of-the-court brief on behalf of
    several historians to the Massachusetts Supreme
    Judicial Court, whose ruling in favor of gay marriage
    triggered the national debate.

    "Those who fear social change see any change in
    marriage and the family as a disaster," Grossberg
    said.

    Ironically, the most enduring aspects of marriage tend
    to be the very opposite of those qualities its most
    vocal defenders associate with it. Romance,
    companionship, the warmth of family life, were rarely
    connected with marriage until recent times. In the
    beginning, it was chiefly an economic institution.

    An engagement party in ancient Greece was a commercial
    transaction, said Marilyn Yalom in "A History of the
    Wife." "It was essentially an oral contract, made
    between the man who gave the woman in marriage -
    usually her father - and the bridegroom," Yalom wrote.
    "The bride was not present."

    In this country, the conception of marriage as a
    transaction between father-in-law and son-in-law meant
    a woman went from being economically dependent on her
    father to the same status vis-a- vis her husband.
    Under a legal theory called "coverture," the married
    pair became one - the husband.

    American wives couldn't own property - even that which
    they inherited from their parents - until various
    states gave them the right between 1839 and 1887.
    Before then, even the wages a working wife earned
    belonged not to her but her husband.

    Husbands could physically discipline their wives, as
    long as they used what was euphemistically called
    "moderate correction." If that, or anything else,
    prompted women to leave home, their husbands would
    advertise the fact in newspapers, right alongside the
    ads Southern plantation owners placed for the return
    of runaway slaves.

    ---

    The U.S. Supreme Court was loath to tamper with that
    tradition of the man as lord and master of the
    household as late as 1911, when it rejected the idea
    that a wife could sue an abusive husband. The justices
    called the very thought "revolutionary," "radical and
    far reaching."

    Little wonder then, that the 19th century abolitionist
    and feminist leader Lucy Stone said, "Marriage is to
    woman a state of slavery."

    And although clerics and statesmen praised marriage's
    civilizing virtues, the institution wasn't always
    available to all Americans.

    Black Americans couldn't be legally married in the
    antebellum South. The idea was seen as threatening to
    slavery, upon which the region's economy depended.
    Even long after the Civil War, blacks and whites
    couldn't marry each other in many states. In the
    Western states, where anti-immigrant fever was high,
    Asians and whites were barred from marrying each
    other.

    In 1967, when the U.S. Supreme Court finally voided
    those "anti-miscegenation" statutes, as they were
    called, 16 states still had them on their books. Even
    then, South Carolina didn't remove its statute until
    1999.

    America's marriage laws and traditions had a long
    prehistory by the time they came to this country,
    observed Harvard historian Nancy Cott, author of
    "Public Vows," a study of marriage and public policy
    in American history. Ultimately, they trace to
    Christian roots.

    When the Roman Empire became Christian in the 4th
    century, the church took charge of marriage. Chief
    among the rules it set for the institution was that
    marriage had to be for life - though earlier cultures
    had provisions for divorce - and monogamous.

    Curiously, that later rule finds no sanction in the
    Old Testament, a text from which Christianity derives
    its moral code. The Jewish patriarchs and kings were
    polygamous - Solomon alone is said to have had 700
    wives. Sephardic Jews, who lived in Arabic countries,
    continued to practice polygamy until well into the
    Middle Ages. Eventually the "ketubah," Judaism's
    wedding contract, held a groom to taking an oath that:
    "he shall not marry another while he is married to the
    present bride."

    Christianity's victory also put homosexuality beyond
    the moral pale.

    The Greeks, the ultimate founders of our civilization,
    didn't have the same qualms about same- sex
    relationships, though historians are divided over the
    extent of homosexuality in ancient Greece.

    Richard Saller, a University of Chicago historian,
    observes that in the ancient Greek city of Thebes,
    homosexual unions were considered not a danger to the
    state, but its last line of defense. The elite force
    of the Thebean army was the Sacred Band, a battalion
    of 150 gay couples, never beaten until it fought to
    the last man against the Macedonians. After the
    battle, King Philip of Macedon came to where their
    bodies lay, reported the ancient writer Plutarch.

    "Perish any man who suspects that these men either did
    or suffered anything that was base," Philip said.

    The Roman Empire flourished for hundreds of years
    after a notable pair of high-society same-sex
    marriages. The Emperor Nero fell madly in love with a
    boy named Sporus.

    "He married him with all the usual ceremonies,
    including a dowry and a bridal veil, took him to his
    house attended by a great throng, and treated him as
    his wife," noted the ancient biographer Suetonius, who
    also reported that Nero tied the knot a second time
    with a male marriage partner.

    Christianity's marriage rules passed into English
    common law and from that into the legal systems of the
    early United States. Thus, Christian doctrine was
    embedded into American law, despite the constitutional
    provision for separation of church and state, Cott
    observed.

    The leading 19th century treatise on the U.S. law of
    marriage defined it as: "the civil status of one man
    and one woman united in law for life."

    Cott noted that in the 19th century, Western
    colonialists and missionaries went around the world
    imposing monogamy on cultures where it was not native.
    The U.S. did the same, forcing Native Americans to
    give up their traditions of multiple marriage. Fear of
    Mormon polygamy held up the admission of Utah to the
    union.

    ---

    Since the era of World War II, Americans' conception
    of marriage has been rapidly changing, said Princeton
    University historian Hendrik Hartog. Women entered the
    workforce, making them less dependent on men. Birth
    control made it practical to separate sex and marriage
    from procreation. Romantic love, a theme that had been
    acquiring emotional power for a century, became more
    the norm.

    "Marriage became identified with individual human
    happiness," said Hartog, author of "Man and Wife in
    America." "Social conservatives haven't been happy
    with that shift, but they've lost at every stage of
    the game."

    Among those stages, he said, were divorce-law reforms
    that made it possible for couples to end unhappy
    marriages and, should the parties wish, try again for
    happiness with another partner.

    Hartog thinks the gay community's push for same-sex
    marriage is a logical extension of the idea of
    marriage as a vehicle for self-fulfillment. Yet he
    wouldn't hazard a guess on the outcome of the current
    battle.

    One thing seems sure, though: People will always
    wonder and worry about the well-being of marriage.

    The pioneering sociologist Edward Westermarck, who
    wrote the first serious study of marriage roughly a
    century ago, had an ornithologist colleague who,
    reflecting on divorce and adultery, concluded that
    humans are morally inferior to winged species that
    mate permanently.

    "He is so filled with admiration for their exemplary
    family life," Westermarck said, "that he
    enthusiastically declares that `real marriage can only
    be found among birds.' "

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