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Out of context: Reply #76714
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- monospaced9
I’m being actively recruited for a job, but there’s a catch, and it’s got me in a bit of a pickle.
I currently work in a (long term) contract position where I am the senior creative lead of a small but growing team, and it’s totally remote. Good culture, great flexibility, but lower pay and no benefits. Not sustainable forever.
This new job is offering a salary waaaay higher than the highest I’ve ever had, the kind of money that might allow my wife to stop working for awhile. Plus benefits. Game changing. It’s for a top global hedge fund, and the catch is they expect all employees to be IN office 5 days a week, NO exceptions.
While I desperately want that salary and stability, I can’t imagine the sacrifices I would make to my family, and the the immense pressure it would add to my significant other, who also has to go to work hybrid.
I’m taking the interviews, but I don’t think I can take an offer. Hoping this can give me leverage to turn my current contract into full time. Or at least a good raise. It’s been exactly one year since I took this job, after being laid off.
Ok. Recruiter is calling me in 5 min. I have an interview with the ECD on Monday.
- For me it would be a hard pass, family first and life is too short.utopian
- Yeah. Kids are 4 and 8 and I can’t imagine how things would work with me gone that much. I would have to hire help at that point.monospaced
- the freedom of remote for me is something that money would have a hard time competing with. I don't have kids, but quality time with my wife beats any salary.capn_ron
- I feel you! It's such a hard balance. My wife and I built careers around prioritizing our family first. I frequently bum myself out thinking about the money...nocomply
- In slightly similar place. Contract role ending in May, found an ideal role, it's hybrid in office T, W, Th, with at least an hour car commute each way.mg33
- My current 3x a week commute is by train, less than an hour each way. In fact, going home I'm out of the office at 4:46pm, and home by 5:30.mg33
- ...on the other side, but our family is tight and it feels good to not be a slave to the man!nocomply
- I live about 20 miles north of Chicago. Commuting is a breeze: I'm 2 minutes from my town's station by car, and a 4 min walk from the downtown station.mg33
- Hey Ron! You still in SD?nocomply
- fuck that._niko
- Thanks all. Good to hear I'm not thinking about this wrong.monospaced
- FWIW my wife took a full-time on-site job last year. We needed the money. Good pay, but 1-hr+ commute each way. She was out of the house 10-11 hours each day.nocomply
- But we couldn't make it work. She turned in her notice, but they needed her and revised her role to part-time remote.nocomply
- Pay is significantly less, but our balance and family dynamic is way better.nocomply
- We'll revisit when our boys are a little older. (Currently 8 and 11.) We'll never get his time back.nocomply
- @nocomply - I'm not in SD anymore. Moved out to Coachella Valley near Palm Springs. How are you doing?capn_ron
- imagine all the kool trump merch u you could buy for the family with the xtra cash though.neverscared
- It's 2026; keep the gig you have and enjoy your life. My wife is the primary bread winner AND we're balanced.
Godspeed @mono!!!ideaist - Hard to put a price on being there for my kids and family during these years. Hang in there everyone, the right thing will eventually come along.monospaced
- Be careful with the leverage play, they may can you. Thinking you’re unhappy or not a long term fit. Regarding the job, the little i know about you...canoe
- ...i think you’ll get more out of being present for your kids rather than having a boat? :)canoe
- Good points.monospaced
- You're not thinking about it wrong, but is it the sort of prospect you could do for a couple of years and then cash out and go back to family life?Nairn
- But no. We had some friends here last week and the father admitted he was sad that he as missing out on so much of his daughter's upbringing by working so muchNairn
- ..and I was quite weirded out by his seemingly not wanting to change that fact. It reminded me ma bit of me own upbringing...Nairn
- ..my father and I are very close, but if I think back to my youth, my.memories of him are mostly about him working too much. Sadness and arguments.Nairn
- My dad growing up worked too much, our relationship is kinda lacking, and maybe that’s why I cherish this time so much.monospaced
- So you know the answer :)Nairn
- Yes. It’s refreshing to hear all of this feedback too.monospaced
- You knew it. Family first. Money can't buy back the time you'll lose without them. Good luck!OBBTKN
- I recently had to choose between a job with better life balance and one in tech that offered my salary again in stock. I passed on the tech job and couldnt ...robotinc
- ... be happier. Cash is nice, but not if it throws the rest of your life into chaos. My perspective anyhowrobotinc
- Good man.monospaced
- Whats the title of the position?Raybandana
- Design Director, not that it matters.monospaced
- you are doing the right thing, man. all the best!renderedred
- mono I just went through this considering an offer at JPMC, I passed.whatthefunk
- Fascinating!monospaced
- I applied there I think.monospaced