Tales from the Strip...
Out of context: Reply #20
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- TheBlueOne0
Like I said, I have too many, so here's a few synopsis:
4) The time we sat at a bar and the guy next to us started up a conversation. When we asked what he did he said "My name is Thor and I live an alternative medieval lifestyle." We moved seats a minute later.
5) The night the hottest girl in the place hit on me and insisted I drive her home. I readily agreed.By her third time on the stage my friend came up behind me and whispered in my ear "Dude, did you see her legs?" "Yeah, hot!" "No, no..look closer...um..needle marks." Yup. Sure enough needle marks behind both her knees. Ah. Wasn't about to play patty cake with anyone that dances with Mr. Brownstone, if you catch my drift. But by this point it's 3:30am, snowing out and the girl is done and now has no ride home. Now I always tried to be a gentleman, no matter how what sleazy level I some how got to. So I keep my word to drive the girl home. We get out to my car and say "OK, where do you live?" "The Bronx." "OK, great, where?" "I don't know, I'm staying at one of the other girl's houses. I just got here from Pittsburgh last night. It's somewhere off of Pelham Parkway. I think.." I now bury my head in my hands.
So I take off figuring I can drive around Pelham Parkway and maybe she'll see something that looks familiar. The whole time she is crawling all over me, grabbing and clutching. I am squirming trying to keep her off of me. Eventually we find the place, and I excuse myself from any touchy feely things, give her a kiss on the cheek, get her number and say "I'll call you tomorrow..." [yeah. right]. She gets out, I take off down the street. Now I'm so tired and distracted and it's snowing and crazy shit. And I'm driving straight off this side street into Pelham Parkway when suddenly I realize my car is sliding. Breaks, useless. I am now staring at traffic I am about to drive headfirst into that's zipping by at 50mph. I am about to die, I throw the emergency break on. I throw the automatic transmission into fucking park. Anything. Whatever I can do. And somehow, luckily, I get the car stopped inches form the traffic. But the transmission made an evil, evil sound. I start driving and again and the car is making all these evil grinding noises.
The transmission actually lasted another four months before falling out.
- If you can tell from my stories I no longer frequent strip bars. They have ill effects on my health and livelihood.TheBlueOne
- more stories please...e-pill