First day at work
Out of context: Reply #29
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- jbranda0
This is a little old but still see it passed around:
1. Agree to organize the company Christmas party. Hold it at McDonald’s Playland. Charge everyone $15 each.
2. Arrive at a meeting late, say you’re sorry, but you didn’t have time for lunch, and you’re going to be nibbling during the meeting. During the meeting eat entire raw potatoes.
3. Attach a sign that says "FAX" to the paper shredder. Sit and watch to see how many people fall for it.
4. Build models of the Seven Wonders of the World using empty soda cans.
5. Find out where your boss shops and buy exactly the same outfits.
6. Hide a rubber cockroach in inventive places.
7. Make up nicknames for all your coworkers and refer to them only by these names. “That’s a good point Sparky.” “No I’m sorry I’m going to have to disagree with you there, Chachi.”
8. Page your co-workers to call their extensions so they call themselves.
9. Page yourself over the intercom. (Don't disguise your voice.)* 1 month ago
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1 month ago
10. Put a picture of your mother on your business card.
11. Schedule meetings for 4:14 pm.
12. Suggest that beer be put in the soda machine.
13. Wait until a co-worker goes on vacation, then relocate everything they have in their office, and move someone else in their place. When they get back act like nothing has changed since they left.
14. When in conversation, no matter where you are in the office, mutter, “I think my phone is ringing” and leave. Go get a coffee.
15. When IT support sends you an e-mail with high importance, delete it at once.
16. Whenever anyone comes in your cubicle insist they knock or don’t speak with them. When they knock, ignore them.