Condoms
Out of context: Reply #82
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- mg330
JackRyan you reminded me of an awesome condom story!
--In college at a New Year's Eve party for 2000/2001, I made a beer run to the supermarket with a friend who was a real "funny guy."
We'd already been drinking a bit, and when we got to the store we walked by the pharmacy, and this guy Jeremy goes:
"Yo! Who's got the keys to the condom box?!?" and like five people just stare at him.
The first register was close to there, and he walked over to some 17 yr old dorky white kid who was at the register and goes:
"Yo my man, you got the key to the condom box?"
the kid just kind of laughs and gives a big dumb "nooo"
The friend turns to me and slaps me on the shoulder and goes:
"Damn Mike I need some rubbers STAT! I'm gonna bang like ten of those bitches back at Fosters house!"
the register kid starts snickering and my friend goes:
"What man? You know how it is! Come on, you've banged a bunch of chicks in the same day right?"
kid goes "noooo!!!" laughing.
My friend then goes:
"Damn bro, you need to get with the program! You've had sex with someone though, right?"
kid goes "nooooo!!!!!"
My friend goes:
"Awww man, you gotta get you some you don't know what you're missing!"
and swear to god, he then did the split finger thing, sliding his tongue through them and tells the kid "I'm gettin' all that action tonight!"
then shouts:
"Who's got the keys to the condom box!!!"
and then we left.
I almost threw up I was laughing so hard it was hilarious. funniest thing ever.