Quality jokes
Out of context: Reply #96
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- rizingdamp0
A guy is driving around York he sees a sign in front of a house:
"Talking
Dog for Sale." He rings the bell and the owner (Jon!!!!) tells him the
dog
is in the backyard. The guy goes into the backyard and sees a
Rotweiller
sitting there."You talk?" he asks.
"Yep," the Rottie replies.
"So, what's your story?"
The Rottie looks up and says: "Well, I discovered that I could talk
when I
was pretty young. I wanted to help the government, so I told MI5 about
my
gift and in no time at all they had me jetting from country to country,
sitting in rooms with spies and world leaders, because no one figured
a dog
would be eavesdropping.I was one of their most valuable spies for eight years running. But
the
jetting around really tired me out, and I knew I wasn't getting any
younger,
so I decided to settle down. I signed up for a job at the airport to
do some
undercover security, wandering near suspicious characters and
listening in.I uncovered some incredible dealings and was awarded a batch of
medals. I
got married, had a mess of puppies and now I'm just retired."The guy is amazed. He goes back in and asks Jon what he wants for the
Rotweiller."Ten pounds," Jon says.
"Ten pounds? This dog is amazing! Why on earth are you selling him so
cheap?""Because he's a liar. He never did any of that sh*t."