Speeding Ticket
Out of context: Reply #12
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- paraselene0
this one's true:
when i was sixteen and growing up in rural hell, i used to rock a little beetle with no muffler. one day a copper pulled me over for doing 90 in a 55. he rolled up to the window and asked 'ya know haw fast yuuz goin', darhlin'?' and i, of course, was forced to reply, 'no, sir. my spedometer tops out at 80, so i'm not too sure.' well, he asked for liscense, registration and proof of insurance and, as he pored over my documents, got a funny look on his face. he leaned over and peered at me:
'ater, sez'ere.'
'yes, sir,' i replied. 'that's my name'
''ich unna them boys is yer daddy?'
[internal monologue: oh, fuck. which one to pick? my actual dad or one of his three, equally deviant, brothers? this is a no win situation and i'm definitely facing a ticket. reckless driving, too, as in the good ol' us of a anything that's more than 30mph over the limit is on beyond just plain speeding. i'm screwed.]
so, honesty being the best policy and all, i told the truth:
'my dad is gael, sir.'
copper grunts: 'mmf. ah seeee. the purty one.'
bad decision.
got my license revoked for that one, didn't i?!?!