Venting...
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- dMullins0
Thanks tOki, I really appreciate you telling us all of that, it means a lot.
- utopian0
Keep your chin up dMullins, enjoy the weekend my friend!
- tOki0
Yes happy friday wherever yall are! I'm opening my first beers now :)
- dMullins0
I've got about 6 hours before I wake up from this nap and can crack beers and drown my sorrows properly. :P Because, on a much more positive note, I've just started working freelance full-time this past week. Got my first bread and butter client—my old agency.
Now I can get shit-faced at "work" all day, as I've always wanted. LOL.
- _salisae_0
Make the choice to exclude him from your life and focus on developing relations that are loving, trusting and mutually respecting. It's damaging to your mental as well as physical health to be left with no choice but to accept such treatment. When he has some time away, maybe 2-3 years from now, see if he's able to try a little harder. If not, you've developed other relationships that are more meaningful and won't be in such a vulnerable position and can then decide whether you want to try with him or not. But he needs to understand it's not up to his whim whether he treats you well or not.
- i_monk0
Get a new dad. Check your local leather bar.
- WrappedInBooks0
This episode of Louie might make things better. It deals with moms...but the situation (maybe tangentially) seems similar.
- CALLES0
allison says it for me... on the :56 second
- zenmasterfoo0
Ok, here it comes...
Monkeyshine recognizes that he's like his dad in some respects. That can be scary, yes. Your father dismisses you and has kept you from his life. This has been training for you as a future father figure as well. You may actually be reflecting some of those dismissive traits right back at him, and even though the irony should smack him in the face, for you it's not going to hit until peace is made - him dying.
The hardest art is realizing you have to step away from yourself to make it better. Some times the harder road is the best one travelled. I say take it. He may end up disappointing you again, but you'll have made important steps to correcting what's inside you since you were 5.
Good luck. I wish you and your dad well.
- seed0
I would agree that this would be a good chance for an honest talk. Tell him that you are trying, that it was incredibly rude to stand you up and relay some of your feelings.
- e-pill0
i fucked up on a recent job.. the client asked for 3 tiers for 3 price points collections for 3 levels of retails. i submitted 5 collections for each level of retail price point, that is 15 different collections [11 different skus in each collection] with 30 colourways for each, also custom hardware, logos and over functionalized.. when i submitted, the amount of work in the short week, really blew their minds as their current team doesn't work that fast as a whole.. that when they made their decisions on the submissions.. the 2nd assignment was given to finalize 1 group, show 3- 2nd tier level collections.. which i had done but without the extra bells and whistles i had present in the first round.
i get a call early morning from the CEO. he starts out by apologizing for waking me up, then starts out saying how he was so impressed with my work ethics, with my attention to detail to the work i presented but also to the research i had done, in such a short time. he was overly impressed that i went passed what was asked and presented it all. he says how the rest of his team respects my experience and wants to see me part of their team for a long time....
then he says.. i was disappointed in your 2nd presentation as you only did what we asked of you to do and did not present the same level of work that i had done a week earlier.. he said even though i had descriptions, a collection story, 30 colourways, he felt the colourway i chose to use as the sample was incorrect, he says the words i chose to describe my own work was incorrect, he goes on about these little details that his opinion of my work that he had no guidance with just was created.. he didn't understand that even though i submitted what he had asked that it wasn't with his current expectations as i had raised the bar on my own visual to others.. that i had to now in his eyes always show that same level.. not sure if i fucked myself or not..
as i work from my home office.. him and his partners now want me to be in their environment as to see just what i do when i do it..
do i continue with this gig? its one of my dream brands to design for, but i worked in so many brands that the dream doesn't matter that much anymore.. do i cut my losses and learn that giving more is a mistake, or do i continue and just submit ONLY what they ask for and never submit more and just keep going?
im not asking for an answer.. i'm just venting!!!
- seed0
Without getting into too much detail I have had to cut all ties with my father. I grew up with constant fighting, domestic violence and extreme alcoholism. My half brother, who I've met only a few times, is older than me and still feels very hurt and abandoned. On the other hand, his presense was so chaotic to me, I recall at 4 or 5 being glad he was gone.
He is very funny when he is in a normal mood. I tried to restablish a relationship with him. I was bringing my kids to visit for a while.
Long story short, he still continued to bother my mother and I can't tolerate that. You can forgive but don't have to associate with someone if bad or threatening behavior continues.
My wife and kids would like to see him. No one on my side of the family thinks we should bother with him. I can't imagine exactly how I'll feel when he is gone.
I think that he warped me in a way as a kid. One thing that does bother me is how much I struggled to be a normal person thoughout my youth and young adulthood. I feel like I've had to learn everything myself the hard way. One positive for me is that I try to do every the opposite with my kids, I teach them everything I wish I would've known, love them and give them every opportunity to grow and succeed in life. They are really sociable and well behaved. I think we should all just try to improve ourselves and the next generation no matter what our experience is.
- _salisae_0
Epill - I think you should get paid for what you create and giving (way) more devalues the requested deliverables.
- _salisae_0
I want to buy some furniture so I choose a retailer whose aesthetic is appropriate and buy a bedroom set. They deliver it and also provide me with extras I didn't purchase. Now I'm wondering if I paid too much initially and if I go back and they don't give me all the extra goodies I'm disappointed and no longer happy with simply making a new purchase.
- cannonball19780
I drove down to my moms house and she put out an air mattress even though my sister's room clearly dosen't have anyone sleeping in there. What am I, the sleep on the floor son? I'm 31. Fuckin' bullshit.
- sea_sea0
fak yall bitchesssss.... just venting.