Client Paradoxes
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- era4O4
Just realized one of my favorite paradoxes:
Client says "We hired you because we want you to use your expertise to tell/show us what looks/works the best."
Client says "This is different from what I've asked of you. I would think that you, as a professional, would learn how to follow directions by now."
Client says "This is merely what I told you to do. I brought you aboard to go beyond the barebones requirements to make this project the most creative it can be. If I wanted barebones requirements, I could've done this myself."
Client says "I appreciate you trying to inject your creative 'style' into this project, but this isn't about your 'style' or 'ego' as a designer, it's about creating what I've asked you to create. It's my brand. My style. Not yours. It's about client satisfaction."
Client says "Please review my checklist and tell me where it says you can deviate from what I've asked. I understand that I didn't provide styles for roll-overs or animations or loading sequences but I would've thought you could 'read between the lines' and divined how to do this so it matches what's in my head."
Client says "I don't think this is worth what we agreed upon. You've ONLY done what I've asked you to do. You haven't added that special 'something' that makes this a work of art. After all, isn't that what I'm paying you for?"
Client says "I want you to go back and think about why I've hired you. Redo this project and use your gut and training and creative mind. Start from scratch. Earn your money."
Client says "I want you to go back and think about why I've hired you. Redo this project and think 'what would my client think about this?' rather than trying to get all creative and fancy with your animations and flash effects."
Client says "If you only do what I tell you to do, then I really don't need you, do I?"
- Ravdyk0
make a poster of it
- TheBlueOne0
Designer to client: "You're fired."
- PonyBoy0
- "Redo this project and think 'what would my client think about this?' rather than trying to get all creative and fancy with your animations and flash effects."TheBlueOne
- with your animations and flash effects."TheBlueOne
- ethanfink0
You might need to control the client a bit more.
Yes your creative vision is where you are brought in, but half-assed clients will take advantage of "creative license". These clients end up not paying, and leaving a hole in the relationship, and reputation of everyone involved.
I just hope you are being paid by the hour, not by the project.
Underpromise and overpreform, thats what I was taught.
- airey0
say it aint so, life is confusing and nothing like the brochure!?!? fuck this, i want to speak to management about a refund. at the very least a new one.
- era4O40
Well, these are just some of the things I've heard over the years -- including the time I spent in the dot-com boom. And rest assured, my responses to the client have gotten better formed over the years to the point where most just reference a list of deliverables, line items or terms in our agreements.
Tell someone they're in danger of being in breach of a contract and their demeanor changes quickly. :)
- nikdaum0
Heard the other day on a con call:
"We are all really enthusiastic about this idea. We have faith in the idea. But if the idea doesn't do well in testing, we will have to scrap it."
I guess that means they have more faith in testing than the actual idea.
- Countryman0
my favorite is:
"I need you to design this _____ faster without sacrificing quality"
you can fill in the blank yourself
- "I need you to pay this ___ more without arguing."era4O4