Dear QBN
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- Khurram
I'm wrecked this morning. WRECKED.
So I wont be doing any work. Instead i'm gonna spend the whole day (with an hour for lunch) on this forum like the days of yore.
I'll be partaking in all inane threads with the usual inflammotry rheotric. In return i expect a host of wankery from you on subjects as diverse as religion, politics, hedge etc.. fucking take em all on.
Cheers,
PS - I wanna give a special shout-out to Michael Francis Thomas who stood me up last night cos he's a two-timing whore!!!!!!!
- Dancer0
~ Franics ~
*sniggers
- moth0
It's David actually.
- Khurram0
Don't talk to me YOU
[img]http://www.websmileys.com/s...
- ian0
Well don't just suffer and bitch, do something constructive. Start a new movie quiz thread or FMT or something!
- moth0
I didn't agree to nothin gov.
- moth0
I've known 12 year old girls less ornery than you Khurram.
- Khurram0
So other night, i'm at my usual Monday night club. This is where i fuck my hipster student girls. And as me and my wing are queing up, i see the alley down the back. This alley peopel use as a public toilet when the line for the club is long and they can't be hanging about. Many a time i've caught a girl squatting pissing there.
So i goes to my wing, "bro, tonight i'm gonna pull a girl back there and FUCK HER."
So we get in the club and it ain't all that. We chode around for a bit, dance to David Bowie. Wing ain't feeling it, not many chicks about and he says "You fancy leaving and trying again tomorrow night?" I'm like - NO hang in there bro, gimme half an hour.
So this chick comes dancing into the scene, cute as. FUCKING cute. And me and wingman are sat on the sofa chairs and she sits on the stage and i'm like, ok MY time to shine. And i open
"Hey, how's it going, I'm Khurram, who are you?" holding my hand out to shake.
"Hi, I'm Rachel.... are you here all on your own?" I turn around and wing has gone.
"Yes, i'm all alone... like pinocchio... will you be my friend?"
"Haha, sure, why are you in a club all on your own???"
bla bla bla bla bla bla
So we're talking, and i'm cutting space and escalating FAST. And very soon we're cheek to cheek and talking. And i show her my super secret hand shake, and we're holding hands now and she tells me shes from Manchester, and im like "Manchester?? Wow, that deserves a kiss!!" So i go in for the kiss and we're making out and she like flips and is chewing my face off. And then her friends see this and they're all like "Oh no! Gotta rescue her from the brown man!" And the come over and grab her off me and are like "We need to party with her for a while". And Rachel looks gutted. But in the mean time my wing is back and i turn to him all like "Dude, you didn't wing me!! I got cock blocked and you didn't handle the obstacles! The fuck kind of wing are you??"So i'm all mad an gnnn grrr all red in the ear... and lo and behold Rachel comes running back to me. GAME OVER. So she's like "Hi, I came back". And i'm smile, grab her hand, pull her onto my lap, and we're going at it again.
So then she goes to me "Have you got a condom?". And i'm like "Of course..." "Where can we go?" She asks, looking around the club. And i think AHA!! My piss soaked alley!!
So i'm like "Sko!!!" (that's short for - let's go). And i rise up, grab her hand and drag her out the club. We go to the piss soaked alley and i throw her against the wall, I hoist up her skirt and start finger fucking her. She grabs my cock and i have some trouble getting erect. And she says "WHy can't you get hard?? Is it cos i'm ugly???" LOL. I say "NO! Honey, my bladder is full, i need a piss". So i go in the corner of the alley and urinate. And she's kneeling behind me kissing my arse cheeks. Which was weird. And i swear my piss was splashing on her face... hehe
So then i get up again and i have her against the wall and she pushes me back and i fall ontop of an upturned box, sturdy enough to take my weight. And she straddles me playing with my cock fingering her cunt. I then pull out my camera and take some pictures:
http://img370.imageshack.us/my.p…
And well a good hour of shagging was had.
Glory times!!!!!!!!!!
- Khurram0
the fuck??
anyone know a good way to get pictures hosted?? this isn't working...
- Khurram0
- yay!! That's my willy that is.Khurram
- duDE!!! not cool
rson - will this be used as your mug shot?thumb_screws
- Khurram0
she kept calling me mohammed :(
- creative-0
COULD ALL DOUCHBAGS KINDLY FUCK OFF NOW
Thamks xxx
- Khurram0
fuck off creative you wanker, noones obliging you to read my thread you fucking tit. Yeah, that's right.... TIT.
- Khurram0
awww, i'm just kidding, i can't be mad at you!!!
xxx
- moth0
oh dear.
i did warn you Ian.
- Khurram0
i actually have a video of that but i'm not gonna put it up, cos it has my sex talk all lkke "mmm, yeah baby, your pussy so juicy, eugh yeeeeah." lol, which would be embarassing for all you to hear.