Triple Dog Dare
- Started
- Last post
- 21 Responses
- 5timuli
ONE-POINT DARES
1. Ignore the first five people who say 'good morning' to you.
2. To signal the end of a conversation, clamp your hands over your ears and grimace.
3. Leave your fly open for one hour. If anyone points it out, say, "Sorry, I really prefer it this way".
4. Walk sideways to the photocopier.
5. While going in an elevator, gasp dramatically each time the doors open.
6. When in elevator with one other person, tap them on the shoulder and pretend it wasn't you.
7. Finish all your sentences with "In accordance with the prophecy..."
8. Don't use any punctuation.
9. Interrupt your conversation with someone by giving a huge dejected sigh.
10. Use your highlighter pen on the computer screen.
THREE-POINT DARES
1. Say to your boss, "I like your style", wink, and shoot him with double-barrelled fingers.
2. Kneel in front of the water cooler and drink directly from the nozzle.
3. Shout random numbers while someone is counting.
4. Every time you get an email, shout ''email''.
5. Put decaf in the coffee maker for 3 weeks. Once everyone has got over his or her caffeine addictions, switch to espresso.
6. Keep hole punching your finger. Each time you do, shout, "dagnamit, it's happened again!" Then do it again.
7. Introduce yourself to a new colleague as "the office bicycle". Then wink and pout.
8. Call I.T. helpdesk and tell them that you can't seem to access any pornography web sites.
FIVE-POINT DARES
1. At the end of a meeting, suggest that, for once, it would be nice to conclude with the singing of the national anthem (extra points if you actually launch into it yourself).
2. Walk into a very busy person's office and while they watch you with growing irritation, turn the light switch on/off 10 times.
3. For an hour, refer to everyone you speak to as "Dave".
4. Announce to everyone in a meeting that you "really have to go do a number two".
5. When you've picked up a call, before speaking finish off some fake conversation with the words, ''she can abort it for all I care''.
6. After every sentence, say 'Mon' in a really bad Jamaican accent. As in: "The report's on your desk, Mon." Keep this up for one hour.
7. In a meeting or crowded situation, slap your forehead repeatedly and mutter, "Shut up, damn it, all of you just shut up!"
8. At lunchtime, get down on your knees and announce, "As God is my witness, I'll never go hungry again!"
9. Repeat the following conversation 10 times to the same person: "Do you hear that?" "What?" "Never mind, it's gone now."
10. Present meeting attendees with a cup of coffee and biscuit; smash each biscuit with your fist.
11. During the course of a meeting, slowly edge your chair towards the door.
12. As often as possible, skip rather than walk.
13. Ask people what sex they are. Laugh hysterically after they answer.
14. Sign or p.p. all letters with your initials and a swastika.
15. Dry hump the photocopier. When someone spots you, stop and cough embarrassingly, then lean in to the machine and whisper loudly, "I'll see you tonight".
- Jaline0
"When you've picked up a call, before speaking finish off some fake conversation with the words, ''she can abort it for all I care''."
Gold.
- vnmbr0
Dave this is the best post ever, Mon.
- monkeyshine0
so...what makes this different from any other day?
- THA0
LMAO
- Jaline0
Regarding 14: you could just be Hindu.
- Point50
I should get 20 pts just for reading that.
- cramdesign0
i already skip all the time anyway, dave.
- MrOneHundred0
I am working by myself, and have tried most of these already today.
- try them again... maybe no one noticed, dave.
cramdesign - how come i didnt see any of it on the web cam?emukid
- There is a whole other life going on in my head. And that webcam feed is a loop from 1997.MrOneHundred
- didn't you pull that trick once before, Keanu?cramdesign
- That was a practice run. This is the serious business.MrOneHundred
- cool.cramdesign
- try them again... maybe no one noticed, dave.
- dbloc0
funny. I've gotten that in an email before.
- kupia0
Best part is most of the men around here are named Dave in accordance with the prophecy.
- YAYPaul0
This post is quickly turning into a hilarious League of Gentlemen sketch! Dave.
- Spookytim0
Made me laugh out loud. Also reminded me of the general lampoonery the design team used to get up to at my last job. Happy Days.
- boobs0
That got me excited!
- 7point340
my favorite was the biscuit punching... it's completely unexpected and horribly funny
- 7point340
also, honestly pictured flavorful when i saw these:
3. Shout random numbers while someone is counting.
4. Every time you get an email, shout ''email''.
- 5timuli0
I asked Dave why I couldn't access any porn but he just shouted at me for having crumbs all over my desk. Then Dave called and asked to speak to Dave. Dave got confused though as I meant other Dave and reminded me to clean the crumbs off my desk.