so Help me God
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- Drno
Athiests as a Majority
This is what it would be like, if the majority of people were athiests.
ATHIEST KID: Mom, I'm going to go fuck a hooker.
ATHIEST MOM: Okay, son.
ATHIEST KID: Afterwards, I'm going to go smoke pot with my friends, since it's "not addictive."
ATHIEST MOM: Okay, come home soon!The athiest kid leaves the room. The father comes home from work several minutes later.
ATHIEST DAD: Hey!
ATHIEST MOM: Hi, honey! I'm pregnant again. I guess I'll just get another abortion, since "fetuses don't count as human life."
ATHIEST DAD: Okay, get as many abortions as you want!
ATHIEST MOM: Oh, and don't go in the bedroom.
ATHIEST DAD: Why not?
ATHIEST MOM: There are two gay men fucking eachother in there.
ATHIEST DAD: Why are they here?
ATHIEST MOM: I wanted to watch them do it for awhile. They just aren't finished yet.
ATHIEST DAD: Okay, that's fine with me!Suddenly, their neighbor runs into the house.
ATHIEST NEIGHBOR: Come quick, there's a Christian outside!
ATHIEST MOM: We'll be right there!The athiest couple quickly put on a pair of black robes and hoods. They then exit the house, and run into the street, where a Christian is nailed to a large, wooden X. He is being burned alive. A crowd of athiests stand around him, all wearing black robes and hoods.
RANDOM ATHIEST: Damn you, Christian! We hate you! We claim to be tolerant of all religions. But we really hate your's! That's because we athiests are hypocritical like that! Die, Christian!
THE END
Scary, isn't it?
- marychain0
what's all this aboot then?
- blaw0
A little early in the week for this kind of bullshit, no?
- You're right of course Blaw. Thursday is a better day for this kind of thing.Studiospooky
- Blaw: Right since 1994™blaw
- sorry :(Drno
- dr_pangloss0
where's the Paris Hilton angle?
- Studiospooky0
Tell me, where can I get a robe like that.
- got a few extra at home. a couple need cleaning though as the are stained with homo blood734
- OH THAT'S OKAY! I'LL TAKE THEM.Studiospooky
- daveglanz0
What the?
- dr_pangloss0
there's some fairly disturbed shit on that linked page : (
- skt0
some of the quotes on there are amazing...
A woman wants to abort a rape child? She should have thought of that before she walked down that dark alley without a male prescence, not to mention she should have thought before putting on revealing attire.
[Yes. It should (be legal). Otherwise you're screwing over the women who don't deserve their fate.]
Are you calling them victims now? Should've stayed in the house where it's safe.
- chossy0
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ath…
some folk are mental.
I once worked in a garage and was reading a book about Anarchy this guy saw what I was reading and said "who the fuck do you think you are wanting anarchy" I said "I don't want anarchy I am simply reading about it", he said "you are the kind of person that wants people pissing up against walls", I said "I'm only reading this book" he said "your a hoor a' a stupid wanting anarchy all over the place", I said how much would you like me to put into your car.
people are generally daft.
- You DO like it when people piss up the wall though, right?Studiospooky
- no as they can always get it higher than me :'(chossy
- That's only becuase you sit down to pee.Studiospooky
- If I can't piss on a wall how am I supposed to mark my territory?TheBlueOne
- GreedoLives0
misspelling atheist consistently = FAIL
- haha i am more athy than you. no no, my friend, for i am the athiest734
- elahon0
Are you fucking serious? Did Bush write this comment or something?
"How can anyone beleive we evolved from monkeys heres a few questions for people who beleive that
1.If we did evolve from monkeys then how come babies arent born monkeys
2.Even Darwin said his theories were wrong before he died so why do you still believe them
3.do you really not believe the bible it says we were created in seven days not millions of years
4.how come we cant speak monkey
Just for a fact ape like creatures are monkeys Just in case certain people get on this thread"
- chossy0
A monkey has a tail an ape does not.
- flashbender0
um yeah, I'm going to go ahead and say that the majority of the quotes on that site are people just making shit up to get a rise out of other people:
"I am a bit troubled. I believe my son has a girlfriend, because she left a dirty magazine with men in it under his bed. My son is only 16 and I really don't think he's ready to date yet. What's worse is that he's sneaking some girl to his room behind my back. I need help, God! I want my son to stop being so secretive!"
- detritus0
"No, everyone is born Christian. Only later in life do people choose to stray from Jesus and worship satan instead. Atheists have the greatest "cover" of all, they insist they believe in no god yet most polls done and the latest research indicates that they are actually a different sect of Muslims."
*chuckles sardonically to self*
- Yeah, I have to say I fall into that category. That Islamic Atheist strand of the whole, ah... okay.Studiospooky
- Drno0
I love how they try to explain fictions over facts
"My mom thinks that even though a person is kind to another, gives to the needy, never swear, never fuck a donkey, is honest,....
that person will go to hell, the only chance he has of going to paradise, is to accept jesus"
mom we need to talk :P
- 7340
... so wait,
we're NOT supposed to be letting gay people have sex in our bedrooms while burning christians at the stake?
then what am i supposed to do on thursday nights?
- Thursday Night is traditionally the best time for posting religious propaganda on QBN.Studiospooky
- Ahaha...!blaw
- Studiospooky0
Is there anything worth transposing from this thread into the “Style Predictions for 2008” thread?
- Please refer to burning Futura Black in above post.detritus
- kelpie0
that first post sounds like my kinda place.