oi
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- kelpie
someone tell me a joke, I am having a week from fucking Hades.
- ********0
joke thread
- kelpie0
I WANT MY OWN FUCKING JOKES AND I WANT THEM NOW DUTCHMAN.
- kelpie0
sorry :/
- paraselene0
so there's an englishman, a scotsman and an irishman being chased by pirates.
they run into the pub to hide, and find three big burlap sacks behind the bar.
each one gets into a sack and hides.
the pirates come rushing into the bar and see these three dodgy lumpy sacks. they pick up the sack with the englishman in it, and give it a kicking. the englishman, from inside the sack, says "woof! woof!"
"right!" say the pirates, "there's a dog in that one!"
they pick up the second sack, with the scotsman inside, and give it a good kick, to which the scotsman replies, "miao! miao!"
the pirates, thinking the sack to contain cats, move onto the sack with the irishman inside.
they give it a good wallop and the irishman shouts, "sack of potatoes!"
- kelpie0
haha, thanks for that :)
- ********0
it's tatties, tatties tatties he shouts... pfft.
anyway, my dog has no nose...
*waits for standard response.
- kelpie0
that must be really shit for him...
- ********0
*waits a little more...
- rafalski0
potatoes.. hahaha... I still cannot get over the weird look I get when I order lasagne and say no I don't want the potato wedges they come with :)
- ********0
bollocks kelpie....
anyway, if you had said, "how does he smell" I would have answered "with his cock"
- paraselene0
well, if we were really going for verisimilitude, i think he'd probably shout SPUDS!
- kelpie0
fnar. that just makes no sense. that's why it's so good.
- kelpie0
now the whole fucking thing makes no sense
- ********0
or he would maybe just shout verisimilitude's
cos it's a word on the tip of everyones tongue
- ********0
ask your printer
- ********0
cos that 1% makes all the difference.
- paraselene0
verisimilitude THIS gingerbeard!!!
*streaks through thread
- ********0
highly unbelievable
- ********0
the mind can make of earth a heaven or a hell
- chossy0
I dropped a smoothie in my car today :/ it went all over my gear stick and down the wee space for where the handbrake goes, I can't get acess to this area to clean it adequatley so in a month my car will smell worse than skt's pant yo!
surely this will crack your face :)