Parents relationship...
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- OBBTKN
Like no other on my age, my relations with my parents are more and more tense day by day...
Talking particularly about my father, he´s been retired from work for a year, health issues involved, and now when the time for final retirement has come, he decided to go work again.
He´ve got ammounts of money and a wife waiting at home now. What the fuck?
Bought a for-vacations-only pretty house, thinking this way he can restore all the years he was´nt at home, but after this summer lived experiences... it´s only wasted money.
His marriage is broken (years ago, but not divorced coz they´re catholic).
His relationship with his son and daugthers is broken.
His relationship with the rest of the world is broken.Now, i´m a husband, a father, a person with no references on life.
Or he´s only is a reference on how not to do the things on life.
Allways i tended to help him, i´ve got a bad response from him.
I know, this is a design related forum, but inevitably, my life is involved on my design career.
Anything to discuss?
- _trish0
look for a new mentor - you have outgrown your dad and he doesnt want your help.
- OSFA0
Sorry to hear this man,, but you're on your own now.
Be the role model your kids need.
- Witt0
"The past is a foreign country. They do things differently there."
L.P. Hartley - "The Go-Between"
- phatlee0
Gedda a grip!
- OBBTKN0
Is not easy to manage.
But i know i´ll go alone on this.Mentors doesn´t grow on trees, thus i must need to learn to be a man.
- planet010
that's rough, i think father/son relationships can't be hard - but, I wouldn't give up on him. He's still your dad after all - he's probably done some good things for you over the years no?
Also, do you know what his relationship was like with his dad? If it wasn't great, that might be all he knows.
- Rand0
apparently brits are always good for stiff upper lip advice
- jox0
Sorry to hear about your situation my friend. Do you connect with your father on any level? Share any interests?
I know it can be frustrating, but I promise you this - if you intentionally lose touch without trying REALLY hard, you will regret it at some point. I have a close friend who recently lost his father, and I know what it does do you.
Fathers can be frustrating, I know. Mine sit on the board of my company, and while he is the economical/logical input, I am the creative one who takes chances so we CONSTANTLY fight over things, but we always compromise.
Please - try harder, because I know you care about him. Otherwise you wouldn't have started this thread. When was the last time you told him you loved him? The fact that he chooses to work through his retirement is his decision, and unless his summer house is in a Bagdad suburb, it is most likely a wise investment.
- OBBTKN0
I´m losing him, this is the reason i´m thinking in our relationships.
We´ve never said how much love the each other in life.
Is not easy to contact when your father is a sportsman and you don´t like sports.
Is not easy to contact when you´re a creative hyperactive guy and your father knows nothing about it.
Is not easy the father-son communication when your traditions demands to be rude.
I must do it harder, but i don´t know where to start...