Tell me jokes or your deepest darkest secrets
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- Kidswift
Mr. T invented fools. Realising the magnitude of his folly, he then created Pity.
It took five women 2 years to give birth to Mr. T.
Mr. T's pity for fools is used by mathematicians as a demonstration of the concept of infinity.
Mr.T once punched Chuck Norris at the exact moment he roundhouse kicked Mr.T in the chest. the result was the 80's.
23. That's the number of people Mr. T has pitied in the time it has taken you to read this sentence.
They say when a bear is chasing a group of people, you don't have to outrun the bear, but only have to be faster than the slowest person. If Mr. T is chasing you, you're dead.
Mr. T's edition of the VH1 show 'Where Are They Now' was the shortest in the show's history. It was 10 seconds long, and consisted of a black screen with the words "Right Behind You" written on it.
In 1995, Mr. T was diagnosed with B-cell lymphoma but he pitied his own fool cells until the disease turned into T-cell lymphoma. Upon closer inspection by doctors, the cancerous T-cells now had mohawks, gold chains around their nucleus and were tired of the other cell's jibba-jabba.
On all 3428 instances it occured, when Mr. T and Chuck Norris both 'deflower' the same woman, the resulting spermal battles have caused the woman's uterus to explode in a flurry of pity and roundhouse kicks.
In 1989, Mr. T systematically killed every member of the band "MR. MISTER" for stealing his first name.
Despite popular belief, if there is a fool in the woods, and nobody is around to hear his jibba jabba, Mr. T is still able to pity him.
Mr. T was fired from the Psychic Friends Network for always predicting pain.
Mr. T is not black. It's just that the sun is to afraid to shine on him.
Chuck Norris' last option is violence. It is also his only option.
Chuck Norris was trained by Bruce Lee, who was in turn trained by a time traveling Chuck Norris thus completing the circle.
Video killed the radio star. Upon hearing this, Chuck Norris killed Video.
Chuck Norris once showed me a video of him making love to my wife, and it was the most beautiful thing I ever saw!
Prior to embarking on a career in show business, Chuck Norris worked at JFK airport guiding planes in to land using roundhouse semaphore. When asked why he didn't use the little flags provided Chuck beat his questioner to death using a group of Morris Dancers. Then he replied "That's why"
Chuck Norris can satisfy a woman just by looking at her. If he smiles, she can't walk right for a week.
Chuck Norris doesn't trust mirrors because there can only be one Chuck.
Chuck Norris is so fast, he can run around the world and punch himself in the back of the head.
Mr. T once shook hands with Chuck Norris, or so it appeared, in
actuality, their combined power caused an earthquake, which gave their
hands a look of shaking to any onlookers, who were probably too scared to
accurately testify anywayOn the A-team, Face , Hannibal, and Murdoch were all masters of disguise.
Mr T didn't have to wear a disguise. The bad guys didn't recognize him out
of fear.Every time a church bell rings, Mr. T pities a fool.
Every time Mr. T pities the fool, a p0rnstar
regains her v!rginity. Then proceeds to lose it to Mr. T.Mr. T was originally cast to play Arnold Jackson on Diff'rent Strokes. Unfortunately
every time he said, "whatchoo talkin' 'bout, Willis?" Willis sh!t
himself.Mr. T doesn't have internal organs. He had them removed to make more room
for muscle.Mr. T once bit off more than he could chew. He ate it anyway.
Mr. T puts the laughter in manslaughter.
- rasko40
thats not very funny at all.
- jox0
The original Chuck Norris list is funny.
- Bottlerocket0
None of this revivalist 80's crap is 'cool'
- Kidswift0
This is the joke thread not the moaning designers Oh thats not so funny thread.... use your pies!
Yawnnnnnnn lets see your material clowns....
- Bottlerocket0
It's not like this thread started on a high point....
- Kidswift0
I hear that! Kidsiwft you suck!! I hope you get eaten by a carniovous squirrel and rot in hell....
That should end this malarky once and for all.
Move along nothing to see here>>>
- Concrete0
Mr. T is not black. It's just that the sun is to afraid to shine on him.
Mr. T puts the laughter in manslaughter.
My Ribs hurt.
How do you follow that?
- Concrete0
Kidswift puts the NT in TNT!
- elahon0
>>Mr. T puts the laughter in manslaughter.
Already done. And on a t-shirt to boot.
- Kidswift0
So a zero is sitting next to a eight at a bar. The Zero turns to the eight.... nice belt
*if you read this and groaned then be safe in the knowledge of me standing staring out of the window of my 40th story office window laughing down on the city and all you little ants whose precious time i have wasted with inane jokes...
opps time to up the meds
- flavorful0
Now that's funnny!
* The asterik part.
- dirtydesign0
Two condoms walk past a gay bar. One condom says to the other,"Wanna go get shitfaced?"
- Rand0
flop sweat