Best Comeback...
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- ********
..I've heard this week.
From today's funny papers in the US:
"I'd break you like a wedding vow on the Jerry Springer Show."
- tehgee0
"ill gut you liek a fish"
-mike tyson
- ********0
Not really come back but...
"They are going after him with a vengance not seen since the Cobra Kai sought Daniel San."
- ********0
Overheard in NYC club a week ago:
"What are you looking at?"
"Is that your wife?"
"Yes."
"Then I'm looking at your wife's ass."
Fisticuffs ensue.
- ********0
"ill gut you liek a fish"
-mike tyson
tehgee
(Jun 10 05, 07:09)omg i was just typing that but got distracted.
wasn't that the best thing ever.
'you're gonna get that kid killed.... sit down.'
haha. can't wait.
- UndoUndo0
Overheard in NYC club a week ago:
"What are you looking at?"
"Is that your wife?"
"Yes."
"Then I'm looking at your wife's ass."
Fisticuffs ensue.
TheTick
(Jun 10 05, 07:13)...................................
brilliant
- opiate0
I woudl'nt even piss on you if you were on fire.
- UndoUndo0
your mutha's ass is so big.....
- ********0
Lord
Man: Haven't I seen you someplace before?
Woman: Yes, that's why I don't go there anymore.Man: Is this seat empty?
Woman: Yes, and this one will be if you sit down.Man: Your place or mine?
Woman: Both. You go to yours, and I'll go to mine.Man: So, what do you do for a living?
Woman: I'm a female impersonator.Man: Hey baby, what's your sign?
Woman: Do not enter.Man: How do you like your eggs in the morning?
Woman: Unferrtilized.Man: Your body is like a temple.
Woman: Sorry, there are no services today.Man: I would go to the end of the world for you.
Woman: But would you stay there?Man: If I could see you naked, I'd die happy. Woman: If I saw you naked, I'd probably die laughing.
- opiate0
priceless JAzX
- codfather0
Whatever anyone says, just prefix it with your mumma...
"You stick of shit"
reply:
"Your mumma stinks of shit"
OR
"You're really good looking"
reply:
"Your mumma's really good looking"
- ********0
One Liners:
Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm
Drink 'till she's cute, but stop before the wedding
Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines
Early bird gets the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese
I'm not cheap, but I am on special this week
I almost had a psychic girlfriend but she left me before we met
I drive way too fast to worry about cholesterol
I intend to live forever - so far, so good
I love defenseless animals, especially in a good gravy
If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?
If you ain't makin' waves, you ain't kickin' hard enough!
Mental backup in progress - Do Not Disturb!
Mind Like A Steel Trap - Rusty And Illegal In 37 States
Quantum Mechanics: The dreams stuff is made of.
Support bacteria - they're the only culture some people have.
Televangelists: The Pro Wrestlers of religion.
The only substitute for good manners is fast reflexes.
When everything's coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.
Ambition is a poor excuse for not having enough sense to be lazy.
Give a man a free hand and he'll run it all over you.
If I worked as much as others, I would do as little as they.
Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder...
24 hours in a day ... 24 beers in a case ...coincidence?
- Jaline0
Haha. Oh that one by TheTick IS funny.
- smoothblend0
your mom goes to college
- swampygav0
If I had a penny for everytime I had a frostie I would have about 100,456 pennies
- waynepixel0
Best Comeback...
..I've heard this week.
From today's funny papers in the US:
"I'd break you like a wedding vow on the Jerry Springer Show."
TheTick
(Jun 10 05, 07:08)Hahahaha. That pritty fucking good.
- jdcomba0
how many emo kids does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
- jdcomba0
eh, noone cares but...
none because they're all sitting in the dark crying about it!
*crowd goes silent
- ********0
I'm sure a bass player from some emo band in new jersey is crying even now on his parents sofa thanks to a crack like that.
- tehgee0
jezz
youre the reason peopel hate jersey
(stolen from jevad!!!!!!)
- The_Separatist0
'It's a small world'
'Unless you have to clean it'