Clients....
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- mayo0
So far this morning I've had one client tell me,"Well, *I HAVE* gone to art school, you know." when i suggested that making both item names AND the descriptions on his menu would defeat the purpose of using bold. Not to mention it just looks like ass.
Then I had another client give me a list of words she wanted used in her ad.
client - Use it just like that. we've calculated that it's a nice flow.
me - :|
So you don't want an "and" in front of the last word?client - No, just straight line it and then send each to the right.
me - ;|
I'm sorry, i don't understand what you mean by that.client - well, if *I* were trying to interpret what *I* just said, i would say to carriage return each word with no comma and then move each word over to the right a little.
me - Like a *gag* stair case?
client - YES! A STAIRCASE! That's an excellent description.
If the day continues like this, I will seriously over-react.
- jpea0
how about 'we want to do something viral'. dipwads.
- t_rock0
are the unfortunate result of our greedy nature
- xau0
Gee... I thought all designers were psychic. Oh yeah, and all designers use Macs? Right?
mayo:
Staircase story had me blowing designer tea out my nose.
- ********0
most recent clientism:
'yeah, site redesign looks great. One thing - can we keep our logo on black, becuase we like the way the white lettering 'pops'.'Its still white on black, I just moved it across...'
'Can we just make it pop a bit more.....?'
(Sure, I'll invent some new RGB colors like "#gggggg" and #-55-55-55, hows that for you ?
- BonSeff0
i just had to redo a site for a guy, his taste is like the voice of those miller highlife ads. it was pretty funny and make my life easier
- clone0
make it "cooler"
- clone0
who's heard this?:
"I don't know what I want, but I'll know when I see it."
fucking retards
- Beech0
make it more matrix-y
- BonSeff0
who's done this?:
"I don't know design, but I'll charge you when i publish it."
fuckin hacks
hehe -yokes
- unfittoprint0
http://www.ninagordon.com/audio/…
You are now about to witness the strength of street knowledge
Verse One: Ice Cube
Straight outta Compton, crazy motherfucker named Ice Cube
From the gang called Niggaz With Attitudes
When I'm called off, I got a sawed off
Squeeze the trigger, and bodies are hauled off
You too, boy, if ya fuck with me
The police are gonna hafta come and get me
Off yo ass, that's how I'm goin out
For the punk motherfuckers that's showin out
Niggaz start to mumble, they wanna rumble
Mix em and cook em in a pot like gumbo
Goin off on a motherfucker like that
with a gat that's pointed at yo ass
So give it up smooth
Ain't no tellin when I'm down for a jack move
Here's a murder rap to keep yo dancin
with a crime record like Charles Manson
AK-47 is the tool
Don't make me act the motherfuckin fool
Me you can go toe to toe, no maybe
I'm knockin niggaz out tha box, daily
yo weekly, monthly and yearly
until them dumb motherfuckers see clearly
that I'm down with the capital C-P-T
Boy you can't fuck with me
So when I'm in your neighborhood, you better duck
Coz Ice Cube is crazy as fuck
As I leave, believe I'm stompin
but when I come back, boy, I'm comin straight outta ComptonChorus:
[City of Compton, City of Compton]
[Eazy E] Yo Ren
[MC Ren] Whassup?
[Eazy E] Tell em where you from!Verse Two: MC Ren
Straight outta Compton, another crazy ass nigga
More punks I smoke, yo, my rep gets bigger
I'm a bad motherfucker and you know this
But the pussy ass niggaz don't show this
But I don't give a fuck, I'ma make my snaps
If not from the records, from jackin the crops
Just like burglary, the definition is 'jackin'
And when illegally armed it's called 'packin'
Shoot a motherfucker in a minute
I find a good piece o' pussy, I go up in it
So if you're at a show in the front row
I'm a call you a bitch or dirty-ass ho
You'll probably get mad like a bitch is supposed to
But that shows me, slut, you're composed to
a crazy muthafucker from tha street
Attitude legit cause I'm tearin up shit
MC Ren controls the automatic
For any dumb muthafucker that starts static
Not the right hand cause I'm the hand itself
every time I pull a AK off the shelf
The security is maximum and that's a law
R-E-N spells Ren but I'm raw
See, coz I'm the motherfuckin villain
The definition is clear, you're the witness of a killin
that's takin place without a clue
And once you're on the scope, your ass is through
Look, you might take it as a trip
but a nigga like Ren is on a gangsta tip
Straight outta Compton...Chorus:
[City of Compton, City of Compton]
[Dr. Dre] Eazy is his name and the boy is comin...
Verse Three: Eazy-E
...straight outta Compton
is a brotha that'll smother yo' mother
and make ya sister think I love her
Dangerous motherfucker raises hell
And if I ever get caught I make bail
See, I don't give a fuck, that's the problem
I see a motherfuckin cop I don't dodge him
But I'm smart, lay low, creep a while
And when I see a punk pass, I smile
To me it's kinda funny, the attitude showin a nigga drivin
but don't know where the fuck he's going, just rollin
lookin for the one they call Eazy
But here's a flash, they never seize me
Ruthless! Never seen like a shadow in the dark
except when I unload, see I'll get over the hesitation
and hear the scream of the one who got the last penetration
Give a little gust of wind and I'm jettin
But leave a memory no one'll be forgettin
So what about the bitch who got shot? Fuck her!
You think I give a damn about a bitch? I ain't a sucker!
This is the autobiography of the E, and if you ever fuck with me
You'll get taken by a stupid dope brotha who will smother
word to the motherfucker, straight outta ComptonChorus:
[City of Compton, City of Compton]
[Damn that shit was dope!]
- RevoltOne0
Can you make it more "edgy"?
- clone0
i want my site to be like "***" but neater and faster and cheaper and yesterday. you don't mind if i watch you work right?
- ********0
*bump.
This was too good not to share. Site is designed and developed, and ready to go TODAY. Now I get this:
"In terms of the layout, the **** logo doesn't seem to come across as much as it could. Can I suggest the following:
**** logo in the top left (stradling the margin) followed by the words "sponsored by ****, followed by **** logo (bigger) in the top right. Then have the big bold "**** Thursday 9 June 2005" under the **** logo on the left had side. I suggest that the "in association with the **** and **** and their logos are then included at the bottom left of each page (to fill the gap). I think that you can then dispense with the margin and spread all the text across the entire pages."Tit.
- tny0
"... I think that you can then dispense with the margin and spread shit across the entire pages."
- ********0
Oh yeah. His last threat:
"I'm sure that I will think of more."
Not if I kill you first.
I just took great pleasure in shooting him down.
- davey_g0
So sick of stupid words from clients, like:
Pizzaz, Jazz it up, Make it pop, Where's my logo-why so small? Just needs a quick smoothing over, quick color change...and My secretary took a stab at that logo-wanna look?
Sometimes you just gotta go off on at least one client a year...fucking blow up on them! It's probably the most fun you can have and they seem to respect you more afterwards, if they don't fire you first.
I'm out.
- iDp0
clients fucking suck...yesterday we got an email from this client we recently quoted a decently steep price for some work and this is what they fucking said...I shit you not.
"We are very very impressed with the comps! I'm sending your check tomorrow! Very impressed!"
ass fucking holes.
- zaven0
today:
me(answering the phone):yesclient(shouting): hey where have you been? I'm waitng those correction since january! you didnt do anything! Im not gonna pay anything!
me(checking my sent mail folder): i wrote you an email on 2nd of february with the link on the correction pages, and with an attacment with all the low res picture so you can provide me the exact name and bla bla...
client:(still shouting and checking his mail): yes yes I have an email from you here.. let me check.
me(hearing he is reading my mail for the first time..)
Client(remarking he is the one that pull out the money):well you have to call me when you send me an email! I'm a busy person I cannot read all the email I receive.
Fuck!
I go to the cinema now!