Audiobranding
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- godot
You think they gonna ditch it in the redesign?
Yay or nay
- jox0
nay
- jevad0
nay
- nick0
no deal.
- Dolan0
We can only pray to all gods that are holy. At least gimme an off switch!
- canadian0
I would hope not.
- JazX0
no and in fact I wish they would add more and with more options, like being able to choose your butons sounds and what not.
- industry730
I love the AB.
But I think we should be able to switch it off, (set a cookie or something)there's nothing worse then doing my morning check of NT at the office and not realizing my speakers are all the way up.
BOOM, NEWSTODAY!Speaking of cookies, REMEMBER MY LOGIN!
- Jnr_Madison0
Hope not too.
- unfittoprint0
i want it louder.
as in 'FUCKING LOUD!!!'
- magicpatch0
Newstoday - For a Louder Tomorrow. Volume 1.
By magicpatch.
Scene 1:
The Rush.
CU - woman waking up for work.
FADE OUT
We will now call this woman the "worker".
Worker gets up in mad panic as she is already running late for work, checks swatch, checks face in mirror... no time for a shower, clothed - off to work.
VO - the worker
A typical morning for me, late as usual, desperately rushing to work so i can check the current threads at NT... what did bonseff think of my shirt?CU - on bus sweating, filtering though purse, to find any lipstick that will do the trick to last for today.
FADE OUT
Hello Marcy. says the worker,
good morning Ms. Harcraft, says Marcy the receptionist.The worker, looks over her shoulder, and sees the boss and floor manager conversing... not sure what to think.
CU - of messy hair and bright pink lipstick.
VO - Honest, im not this bad all the time, last night was a bit rough... i did not make it to bed until 4:00 am
The worker looks at her swatch,
the pop-swatch says 8:45.VO - shit, i was supposed to be here 15 mins ago...
Flashback - Loud club music starts playing and shows the worker coke fueled dancing -crazy style, like shes fucking john travolta in saturday night fever, sweat, strobes, bright colors, all with a tint of yellow...
SPLIT SCREEN
Left - The Worker sees the boss approaching her...
Right - The boss walking down the isle, sipping his black coffer with his " I LOVE NY" mug...CU - Boss has an abnormal growth on his nose, exactly where his thick brimmed glasses rest on.
CU - the worker, desperately cleaning her desk, tidying up all incriminating evidence, to make it look as though she is working.
(She has a look in her eyes like she has just lost a $10,000 bet to a bookie that she cant pay)
CU - bosses feet in front of the workers cubical.
Ms. Harcraft, may i have a word with you in my office please...
The workers eyes slightly roll back, but not enough to make it obvious that shes grossed out.
All she can think about is today is the day of NT's redesign, im going to be the last one in,.. what the fuck will i miss...
Mad panic sets in the workers eyes.
FADE OUT.
Scene 2.
"The Talk"
From the back wall of the hallway, you see the worker walking towards the boss's office.
Step by step gets louder until the sounds is like a dinosaur thumping out of jurrasic park.
When we realize that it is her heart about to beat out of here chest...
CU - The workers hand twisting the doorknob of the boss's office.
She walks in, the boss greets her, then offers her to sit down...
The worker sits.
SPLIT SCREEN:
Left - The worker - fake smile, not knowing what to think, but has a good idea of what this is about.
Right - The boss, almost picking his teeth with his tongue, and a vibe of I am better than you is in the air.
CU - Boss offers the worker a chocolate, from a box that looks to be from 1986...
CU - Dust on box, and finger prints on the receiving end from where he would normally pick it up.
Chocolate? says the boss...
errm... no thank you i just had breakfast.
Fine, fine, says the boss putting away the chocolates...
So Ms. Harcraft, do you know why i have called you in here.
I think so, does it have to do with my annuals?
Partially, yes, but on the other hand, we have installed a web monitoring function through out our network on the 3rd, 12th, and 33rd floor of this building.
CU - Puzzled look on the workers face.
FLASHBACK - The worker tries to think of how much porn she has downloaded and starts to think she is not getting out of this alive...
VO - Fuck! im busted
CU - the boss's sneering eyes look her up and down, still picking his teeth with his tongue.
We have noticed that you have spent an incredible amount of time on a website called - Newstoday. I have checked out this site, why are you spending so much time here... close to 75% of your day has been logged with surfing this site.
Can you explain this?
FLASHBACK - the workers brain goes through an enormous amount of sites, topics and reactions all from NT.
umm... er, well all i can say is that it is a constant source of news, and I want to stay on top of the market, to make sure I am working at a competitive level...
CU - Bosses left brow raises and pushes glasses up with index finger...
I noticed your user name also, when we cleaned your computer, it says in the personal setting that you have over 6,000 posts... is it necessary for you to be involved with so many topics...?
well, i must say that i can relate to them on a consistent basis, and feel that it is my duty to help others out.
The boss - leaning towards his computer, brings up NT on his compaq laptop, which looks to be a little bit of mustard, on the lid...
Soooo, says the boss, within this _Joke Me thread, you have posted over 200 jokes, are these supposed to be helping people out?
CU - single bead of sweat from the workers brow...
As she gulps, she tries to say something when i comes out like garbage,.. yehjkhfg,,, i mean, she clears her throat... that is just part of it, not everything... (whimpers the last words of the sentence)
I think i have to say no more to this, we cannot afford to pay you to be surfing the net all day.
Either you get your shit together, or... you know where the door is... what is your decision?
CU - clock from radioshack, slowly turing to 8:35...
click... 8:35The worker answers: I want to keep my job.
FLASHBACK / VISION
The worker dangling boss over niagra falls, saying - WHO YOU TRYING TO FUCK WITH EH?
YOU CANT HAVE THE BEST OF ME YOU SUCKA - Starts laughing...
OVERHEAD
Arm of the worker dropping boss into Niagra falls... falling falling falling, just about to hit the bottom.
CU - Boss's I love NY coffee mug, hits desk with a SLAM!
Alright! its good to see you have made the right decision, exclaims the boss, with a tone of victory and betterment.
VO - What a prick, man, i would do this fucker in.
(as the VO says IN - CU of boss's hand pointing - OUT)
She leaves, feeling like a sack of shit, walking by her coworkers, with a sense of shallowness.
Shelly - the annoying coworker, slips out a mini - I told you so
The worker looks back at Shelly, only to notice that she is smiling in the distance...
VO - what i would do to kick her face in
FADE OUT
Scene 3:
The Desk.
CU - Back of the coworkers computer ( wires all over the place, a real fucking mess of cables and devices sticking out of this ratty old machine they call a workstation)
From the audio port on the sound card, is a plugged cable running underneath the carpet.
CU - shitty diagram of cable running from CPU to intercom system amplifier...
Little does the worker know, that another coworker by the name of Mr. Dob has rigged the sound card to play through the intercom and PA sound system.
FLASHBACK / VISION
The worker imagines what the boss just told her, and also realizes that she is missing out on the NT redesign.
VO - I can do it, no one is watching, all i need is a little fix...
SPLIT SCREEN:
Left: The workers hands on keyboard.
Right: the words Newstoday being typed out in the browser.The worker looks in both directions, sighs, takes a deep breath, not knowing what she is about to see...
she hits enter:
Fade out on finger hitting enter:
FIN
- magicpatch0
dont ask me why...? i just started typing and could not resist :-D
- godot0
Was that the first ever NT film?? Pretty good! Um, you got issues with your job, magic? ;-p
I think they gonna keep the noise but probably change the voice. It IS annoying at work... Not that they care hehe
PS Anyone know who that girl on the AB is? Which of those guys has kids?
- jevad0
haha magic - that was awesome!
- zeroblade0
video coming up?
i'd like to see john travolta hehe.
nice (anti)work magic.
- JazX0
we got plans for an NT Movie then? Haaaaaaaa that would be so much fucking fun. Actually, I think there could be some support for that kind of thing through some educational grant if we did it right haaaaaaaaaaaa...
- swollenelbow0
the movie would turn into a bad porn about 15 minutes into it.
- jevad0
yeah and everybody would be fighting to wear the cock hat....
- rasko40
Magicpatch: more! I was engrossed.. that would be so funny :)
- JazX0
and whom is the director? 4cY?
- swollenelbow0
tazzagee, directs the boys..."mush mush, take me to my trailer!" she says, and then with a stern voice she would say "Now act for me! ACT!"