Interesting Clients...
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- jevad
Herwith follws an excerpt from a telephone discussion with Miss X, who works for a very large software company, Company Y. Now, Company Y have a MASSIVE guidlines book and are very strict about it. I floow it to a t, except where I find loopholes for artistic expression of course! All the following is true - I couldn't make this shit up....
Miss X has been with this company 3 weeks, and is the Junior Marketing exec. Miss X is supposed to know how to do her job. Miss X however, appears to be a blathering idiot...
[phone]...
ME: Hello?
X: Hi - is this Nic? This is [idiot] here - I wanted to talk to you about the piece of DM you just did for us. I like where it's going - but I'm not sure about the colors and maybe it needs a couple more jazzy photos to like, you know, liven it up?
ME: Um...those are your corporate colors, we use them on everything we do for you, because they are your corporate colors, and we get shouted at if we don't use them..[trying to be funny]...
X: Yeah...well...I just thought maybe we could try something different with this piece - maybe throw some yellow in there to liven it up...[At this point I looked around the office to see if someone was taking the piss or trying not to laugh...]
ME: Uh...lemme get this straight - you want me to *not* use the colors that your brand guidlines booklet implicity decrees must always be used on everything we ever do, and use a color that it says never to?
X: In what booklet?
ME: The brand guidelines booklet.
X: What's that?
Me: Ha ha! Exactly! [Thinking she was trying to be funny like I had just been]
X: What's the brand guidelies book?
ME: It's the book that says what can and cannot be done when designing things for your brand!
X: Oh cool - we have one of those? Can you give me a copy?
ME: YOU SENT IT TO ME LAST WEEK!
X: Oh....um....I'm gonna call you back in a minute...
[hangs up]I was in total disbelief at what I had jsut heard and was sure someone put her up to that - but everyone was as amazed as I was when I recounted everything - but when I told the CD he went ballistic because apparently he was having some trouble with her this morning..
I don't know if they had the tea-girl covering or what - but this is a multi-national BOHEMOTH of a company, and their supposed Junior Marketing Exec doesn;t know what fucking branding guidelines are! Or remember that she sent them to me!
I'm still not convinced someones pulling a fast one....
- unknown0
ehh... is that the worst of your problems?
how long have you been dealing with clients?
- jevad0
5 years.
And I have never, ever come across anything as fucked as this...
- kpl0
haha, I wish I had stupid clients to work with, and laugh at them.
unfortunately the only people I work with are very perceptive and they tell me quite accurately how much I suck.
- unknown0
count yerself lucky man!
- sexypixel0
haha jevad, thats pretty bad. Just shows how many muppetts get good jobs, she must give good head.
- mrdobolina0
KPL, those photos on your site are f'ing nice.
- jevad0
got a good story jon?
^_^
- unknown0
too many to mention
not long ago - managing director of client company standing over my shoulder for about an hour and suggestings things like "can you make the text red and large so it stands out... and use that comic font..." - then our MD joins him also peering over my shoulder and make conflicting suggestions (also crap)
- unknown0
hey StyleJunky that's the way the CEO and CFO of the company I work for give us input all the time.
move this here, move that there, what if we just eliminated that image, grrrrrrrrrrrr so annoying. and neither have any design or business training what-so-ever!
:P
- unknown0
i know - makes you feel like a fuckin coffee boy
- unknown0
next time it happens i think i'll say "hey guys, would it help if i pulled down my pants and bent over while i make these changes?"