becks

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    David Beckham decides to go horse riding. Although he has had no previous
    experience he skilfully mounts the Horse and appears in complete command
    of the situation as the horse gallops along at a steady pace. Victoria
    admiringly watching her husband. After a short time David becomes a little
    casual and he begins to lose his grip in the saddle, he panics and grabs
    the horse around the neck shouting for it to stop. Victoria starts to
    scream and shout for someone to help her husband as David has by this time
    slipped completely out of the saddle and is only saved from hitting the
    ground by the fact that he still has a grip on the horses neck. David
    decides that his best chance is to leap away from the horse, but his foot
    has become entangled in one of the stirrups. As the horse gallops along
    David's head is banging on the ground and he is slipping into
    unconsciousness.
    Victoria is now frantic and screams and screams for help!!!!

    Hearing her screams, the Tesco's Security Guard comes out of the store
    and unplugs the horse.

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    alex ferguson decides to pay a visit to asene wenger and to watch arsenal train. whilst he watches he is suitably impessed, and he asks asene how he gets his team mto perform so well. asene replys, saying that he likes to keep his teamin top mental fitness as well as physical condition. confused, alex asks for an example. arsene calls over dennis berkamp and asks him 'he is not your brother, but he is your fathers son, who is he?' 'thats easy' says dennis' its me.
    later on, alex decides to try this on his own team. he calls beckham over and asks hi. 'he is not your brother, but he is your fathers son, who is he?''. confused, beckham says 'thats a tough one boss, can you give me some time to thing about it' 'alright then, make sure you have the answer by tomorrow though' replies alex.
    david gets home, and he's thinking about the question, but really doesnt have a clue. eventually he gives in and decides to phone up ronaldo for the answer. he gets on the blower, and ronaldo answers. 'hello ronaldo, its beckham here, ive got a question for you'. 'fire away' says ronaldo. ''he is not your brother, but he is your fathers son, who is he?' says beckham. 'thats easy' says ronaldo, 'its me'. 'oh, brilliant, thanks a lot' says beckham and hangs up.
    back at training the next day, ferguson asks david if he's got the answer to the question.
    'yeah its easy' says beckham 'its ronaldo'

    'no you silly cunt' says ferguson 'its dennis fucking bergkamp'

  • ********
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    LOL, I only get that from living in Europe for more than 10 months at a time. :)

  • prom3theus0

    brilliant!
    any more?

  • bolus0

    HAHAHA LOL

    i heard that I used to tell that joke in elementary school, well, the dutch version that is, dunno if it was 'the original', the becks one was hilarious too

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    I love soccer, get rid of JazX