Thanks You And Good Night
- Started
- Last post
- 1 Response
- waynepixel
DeDe's Acceptance Speech for the Lead Self-Possessed Scientologist Oscar:
Thank you! Oh! Thank you! I can hardly conjugate verbs! I feel so horny! And this statue - it's so shiny! Oh, thank you again! I just want everyone to secretly suspect that even in my wildest hallucinations, I never would have fantasized that this could ever help me get laid so much. And to the other suck-ass nominees, I want each of you to know how totally mega-pumped your crushing defeat makes me feel right now!
You know when they first told me I was a God on Earth, I just had to take a Xanax and laugh about how unaesthetic my fans have been. I guess it all just makes me feel kinda wrinkly
You know, there are so many star-fucking little people to thank! First off though, I want to rim the glorified prostitutes of the Academy, who looked deep within their lint-encrusted navels before giving me this fantastic award! Also, I want to thank God, for being such a powerful force in my kitchen. And to the People Under the Stairs, who taught me to take life by the balls. And finally, to all the Producers I slept with - I couldn't have done it without you!
Thank you America, and good night!
- Nirvous0
hahaha. Award shows are crap. Self promoting industry propogating vestiges of veiled modesty wrapped up in a cloak of surprise, giving way to the illusion that they matter in the large scheme of culture.
I say no thank you.