Rumors
Out of context: Reply #41
- Started
- Last post
- 47 Responses
- kingjulien0
I heard Mike Tyson takes his teeth out at night and places them in a gold decanter on the nightstand, where they marinate in oil and vinegar for prosperity. I also hear he and Elton John were seen arguing in Vegas last weekend about whether to attend the New Edition Reunion tour or just freebase with Bobby Brown at the after party at Circus Circus' upstairs spinning bar, where Jimmy Walker was doing an impromptu standup performance with two of the original members of Menudo. At the bar Tyson started handing out two dollar bills and pressuring friends to donate to his political action committee, which was formed to create the flossiest natural juices and berries ethnic hair care line ever, to be sold exclusively at Long's, and where Bryant Gumbel's long lost 5th brother, Gerald Gumbel, will take over as the official spokesperson/model. I heard that Chunk from the Goonies and Johnny from the first Karate Kid were seen hitting on Lisa Ling formerly of the View, who had just flown in from Afghanistan with a ridiculous supply of opium poppies, which she's now peddling on eBay in this weird goulache type drink, which you have to sip out of those cereal bowls with the built in straw. I heard Lisa was then seen huddled in the corner with Quentin Tarantino, QT as we call him, who was on horse tranquilizers at the time, and wanted her for his latest film, a remake of Soul Man, with C. Thomas Howell now the Professor at Harvard instead of James Earl Jones, who's on sabbatical in Thailand with his new masseuse, Ngoc Vo, Woody Allen's new step-daughter, who last week at this time was designing the new Air Jordan 25's . The soundtrack will consist of Phil Collins' Take Me Home and Rockwell's I Always Feel Like Somebody's Watching Me and of course, Color Me Bad's I Wanna Sex You Up.