Need jokes
Out of context: Reply #101
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To Women everywhere, from the Men who have had enough!
1. If you don't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't expect us to act like soap opera guys.
2. And when we're going out, absolutely anything you wear is fine. Really. Just fine. The first thing you put on. Truly. Now let's get going.
3. Crying is blackmail.
4. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it, that's what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
5. We don't know what day it is, and never will. Write all birthdays, anniversaries and other special occasions in bright red on the calendar.
6. Just come out and ask for what you want. Let's be absolutely clear on this point: Subtle hints don't work, strong hints don't work, really obvious hints don't work. If you're really serious about it, just come right out and ask us.
7. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument and all comments become null and void after 7 days.
8. You can either tell us to do something -or-tell us how to do something, but not both.
9. Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during commercials.
10. All men see in about 16 colors. Peach is a fruit, not a color. And life is easier if you bunch all those "eggshell" colors into "pretty much
white."